Offside
by PhoenixAtBreakingDawn
Summary: Rewritten Version. At 17 Bella Swan met NHL hockey player Edward Masen, after a whirlwind romance and a broken heart Bella is left with so much more. As fate would have it nothing has gone the way she has planned. Now nearly six years later Edward is in for the surprise of a life time, fatherhood. How can Bella and Edward fall back in love with fate getting in the way? E/B
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note; alright everyone, here is the official first chapter rewrite of Hockey Changes Everything. I'm going to try and be finished with the rewritten chapters tonight so they will all be posted either tonight or tomorrow, and hopefully the story will be completely finished with in the next couple days. Please review and tell me what you think, because you guys are all the reason this is being rewritten. **

**Chapter One**

**January 2006**

**Bella **

I closed my eyes once more, I didn't know what to think anymore. When he first broke up with me I honestly thought it was a joke. Then the words 'I don't love you anymore' came out of him mouth, and I knew it was true. The look on his face said that his words were tearing him apart inside, but he still said them, he wanted to be done with me; this wasn't some cruel joke. A month after the last time I saw Edward things on my end started to change, and after another two weeks I was sitting in a hospital room, listening to a nurse tell me that I was pregnant. There was no doubt in my mind that the baby was Edward's, he was and is the only guy I have ever been with.

So here I am, sitting in a living room next to a fire in the middle of January, knees pulled to my chest holding myself together for this little baby inside of me. Esme, Carlisle, Alice, and Rose said around me, some on the floor and others on the various couches, all trying to help me figure out what the hell I was going to do. Heaven forbid if they didn't support me, these people, well they were the only family I had now, and if they hadn't supported me I would be out on the streets, pregnant and alone. Today was a day like many others where we all gathered to try and find a way for me to tell Edward, I still hadn't because I was afraid of his reaction.

"Maybe you should just tell him Bella, you don't know that he won't want something to do with you and the baby." Rose said acting like it was really no big deal.

But it wasn't that easy, I couldn't just go to Pittsburgh and show up at his apartment saying 'I'm pregnant it's your baby' he would roll his eyes and slam the door in my face. I looked to the window, watching the thick flurries of snow outside, just wishing that I could be like the snow, free, with no one telling me what to do.

Winter in New Jersey was cold, and pretty, it was my favorite time of the year. It was the time of year when I just wanted to spend all day, and every day in Manhattan, Central Park to exact. I wanted to skate in Central Park and at Rockefeller Center; just like I had done with my parents when they were still alive. "It's not that easy Rose, he told me he didn't love me. I don't want him to come back into my life just because I'm pregnant, because he thinks he's obligated."

"Bella, the boy is obligated" Esme said, resting a hand on my shoulder. "What about a letter? So you don't tell him face to face, at least this letter will give the boy the opportunity to make a decision without having to tell you face to face." She said causing me to just shrug.

"Bella, honey, right now there isn't much that you can do. If you don't tell him, both he and this baby could be missing out on something good. Just try something, anything, if he doesn't respond then you know that he doesn't want to be part of your lives, if he does, then this baby is getting a father, which I know is something you want." Carlisle said, always the wise one.

I groaned, and as I leaned farther in to the couch I knew everything they were saying was right. I rested my hand on my stomach and smiled, though it was still to early to find out what I was having I was still excited, and kind of happy to have a piece of Edward with me. I knew I was young, and that my reasons sounded immature and naïve, but I knew I would be able to do this. I had always been mature for my age, and I had help. Carlisle and Esme already told me that they would be here to help me if I decided to keep the baby, and honestly, I didn't think I would ever be able to get rid of my baby.

"Just think about it honey, no matter what you decided we're here for you." Esme said as she patted my shoulder, and moved in to the kitchen.

Just a few minutes later after a snack, I went up to my room hoping that being alone would allow me to make a decision. There were a lot of things that I needed to think about, and my room was always a good place to do so. Another reason was because tonight was the night the Devils were playing the Penguins, and I wanted to watch not only because the Devils are my favorite team, but because Edward plays for the Penguins. Yeah, maybe it was a little pathetic of me, stalking my ex-boyfriend as he played professional hockey, but it was the only way I could see him.

Over the last couple months I had watched as many games that included Edward as I possibly could. He had become easily irritable, almost as if he had been taking lessons from Emmett; he had gotten in to more fights and had started to really rack up some penalty minutes. In the time I had known Edward, I had never seen him this angry in any hockey game.

Trying my best to avoid following Edward's every move on the screen, I grabbed my notebook off the table and started to write. I paid little attention, scribbling down random things, and it wasn't until after that I realized I had written a letter to Edward. Everyone was right, Edward deserved to know about our baby, and this letter would tell him everything because despite the phone calls I had made, I would never be able to tell him. To put it simply, I was, no am, a coward.

The next morning I woke up bright and early, I wanted to make it to Pittsburgh before lunch, and I wanted to give him this letter. Giving him the letter in person was my sad attempt at seeing him once more before everything went to hell, and I just hoped that he was there when I arrived. In half hours time, I had showered, thrown my hair in a ponytail, put on a little make up, and dressed in a pair of jeans, with two long sleeve shirts, and a pair of green high top sneakers before running out the door to my Audi. The letter was tucked safely inside my bag, and I took my vitamins before pulling out of the drive, maybe this meant something good was going to happen?

I arrived at the arena shortly after lunch, and as I look around the parking lot I could see that Edward's car was still here. Before I could go inside Emmett McCarty came out of the locker room door, and I knew that he would have to let me in to see Edward. "Emmett!" I called climbing out of my car and jogging over to him. "Hey Emmett!" I called again, this time he turned toward me.

"Uh, hey Bella, what are you doing here?" he asked me nervously, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Is Edward still here?"

"Yeah, he's on the ice, but he asked to not be bothered. What's up?" he looked down, his eyes wide, "are you" but before he finished I held out the letter to him.

"Can you make sure that he gets this? It's important."

"Not a problem" he said taking the letter from me. "See you around."

As I walked to my car I could see Emmett watching me, making sure that I climbed in my car and drove away. I wasn't sure why that was, Emmett always seemed pretty cool when I had talked to him, now he just seemed nervous. I just hoped that in a couple days time I would hear back from Edward.

**December 16, 2012**

**Hoboken, New Jersey**

"Logan, if you don't hurry your little butt up, you're going to be late for hockey practice, and if you're late for practice then we don't get home in time for the game!" I called up the stairs to my five-year-old hockey-obsessed son.

A minute later my messy haired son appeared at the bottom of the stairs with a crooked smile on his face. My goodness how much he reminded me of his father sometimes. Grabbing his helmet out of the hall closet and stuffing it on his head his stick came next. "Where is your hockey bag?"

"Car 'member? You didn't wanna bring it in last night." He said as he ran out the door without a jacket.

I groaned and grabbed his jacket off the hook, following him out the car. This was the time where I was relieved that we only lived five minutes from the arena where Logan played hockey. No matter how much I yelled up stairs, or tried to coax the kid out the door we always arrived five minutes before practice started.

After parking the car and helping Logan with his bag I walked to the small concession area they had to watch over the practice and get some coffee with Alice and Rose who were already there waiting for me. "Who dressed you?" Alice giggled as I walked to their table.

I rolled my eyes, when you have a five year old at home, sometimes the only thing you have time to slip on is a pair of jeans, a sweater, and Ugg boots. "You're hilarious" I said rolling my eyes and sitting down.

Both her and Rose smiled before Alice made her average complaint about winters in New Jersey. "I seriously hate winters in New Jersey" now this sent Rose and I in to fits of giggles, she had been saying this since we were children, and I didn't think that it would ever change.

"How are you Bella? It's been forever since we've seen you." Rose said sipping at her coffee.

"I'm good, tired, but good. Logan is all over the place and I've been busy with the shop. Lately we've just had so many new customers I've been thinking that it's time for us to expand. We're still a new shop, but we've had so many repeat customers it might be a good idea. But what about you guys, I know I've been few and far between lately."

"I'm good, excited to finally be graduating, I'm getting so sick of taking exams." Rose laughed. For the last five years Rose had been pursing an engineering degree, and she was ready to come back home and open a shop in Newark.

Alice sat across from us quietly (for once) but I could tell she was holding something inside, something that was going to make everyone happy. "So I was in the shop last week talking to a customer, she wanted to customer order a few items from me, when an older women came in. Turns out, this woman had seen my designs and heard about me through a couple people, and she wants to help me get my line started. My own personal line, I wouldn't just be selling a few things here and there, my own line that would start off in high end boutiques." Alice said finally blurting out what she had to say.

For the next half hour we talked about this opportunity Alice was presented with before the girl ganged up on me about Christmas. "So Christmas is right around the corner, what does the little man either want or need?" Alice asked causing me to groan.

Over the years Alice and her family had done so much for me, they supported me while I was pregnant with Logan, and helped me get on my feet and get my college degree while taking care of a child. They made sure Logan had everything he wanted, and though I was thankful that they were so generous I hated that I couldn't do all of this on my own. But as Alice had started to make her own money, and Rosalie's trust came in, the girls had started to try and help me as well, mostly around the holidays.

"He's been talking about this Volchenkov jersey, and how he wants it signed, but I know he really wants tickets to a Devils vs. Penguins game. I'm working on the Jersey, but it's difficult because Logan is always with me." I said as they rolled their eyes.

"We'll take care of it" Alice said as Rose piped in.

"Are you sure about that game Bella? I mean there are hundreds of other games that we can get you tickets to, but that game? I know it's been five years, but there is a chance that Edward is going to see you and Logan. He's never shown any interest in the two of you these past five years, I don't want him to get any ideas now."

I shrugged. "I'm sure Logan wouldn't be disappointed if it was any other game, but this is the one he really wants to go to. If we do go, I highly doubt that Edward is going to pick me out in the crowd, he won't know that we're there, and I'll make sure of it. Hockey is hockey to Logan, either way, I know he'll be happy."

Pushing the button on my cell phone I stood up. "Alright ladies, I have to go pick up a hopefully tired five year old and get some food in him. I'll give you a call sometime later in the week."

**Edward Masen**

**December 16, 2012**

**Penguins Locker Room**

"Edward, grab my hockey tape out of my bag will you?" Emmett called as I headed from the gym to the locker room. I nodded and walked over to Emmett's locker, digging around in the hockey bag before everything toppled on to the ground.

"Son of a" I said as I bent down, picking everything that had scattered and throwing it back into the bag. Getting down on my knees to pick up his tape, which had rolled under the bench I saw an envelope down there as well. Picking it up I saw the edges had yellowed, but that my name was written on it in cursive. "What the?"

Tearing the envelope open I took the contents out and started reading.

_January 12, 2006_

_Edward, _

_ It feels so strange to be writing you name now, it actually feels more strange to say it out loud, but that's a different story. It's weird to think about you as I write this out, or even to read it, because you know I re-read everything. It's been just over two months since we've last seen each other, two months since you broke my heart, and sixteen days since I've found out some of the most amazing, most life changing news. I know you, you're already thinking of the hundreds of things that I might possibly tell you, and if you stop thinking and just continue to read you may eventually find out. I was sitting downstairs earlier today, sitting by the fire in the big armchair, the one where I always sit and think, wrapped in a big blanket, watching Pride and Prejudice, sipping a big mug of hot cocoa, and I couldn't stop thinking about the day we met. I remember that day, Esme and Carlisle had agreed to let Alice and I go to Pittsburgh with Rose, and since we didn't want to order out or go to a restaurant, we decided to get food and cook in out little kitchen in the hotel room. I accidently ran my shopping cart into yours and as I looked up in to your eyes I saw that they were the brightest, most vibrant green that I had ever seen. They had this twinkle about them, this twinkle that was so special, and every time I looked in to your eyes that twinkle continued to be there. I had no idea that you were and NHL hockey player, and I think that had to be one of the reason we connected so well, I didn't care who you were, you were just Edward Masen; the green eyed boy with crazy bronze/copper colored hair, from Chicago who loved hockey. It was these things that made me fall in love with you. It also made me think of the time you took me to the arena in Pittsburgh, I think it was a month after we started dating. You put me in a pair of hockey skates, and chased me around the ice. It was the same day you picked me up and threw me over your shoulder, skating around the ice like it was no big deal. It was the day I met Emmett and Sidney. They were the first two hockey players, other than you, that I had ever met, and I think they accepted me the most. But by far, my favorite memory is the day you surprised me in the middle of school. You dazzled the secretary to let me out of class because she kept telling you that you weren't authorized to sign me out, but you wouldn't take no for an answer. When she finally let me out, you took me to lunch, and we just talked and talked for hours. It wasn't about anything important, just the little things we didn't know about each other. Who we were, what we wanted in life, what we wanted from each other, and everything in between, I still want the same things, do you? It was the same week that you took me to my first live NHL game. I had watched so many on TV with my father, but we had never been to one; it helped that it was against my favorite team too, the Devils, and you were so angry that I loved them. I had grown up watching them after all, first with my dad, and then with Carlisle. You hated that I refused to wear a Cullen jersey, and you knew that it would never happen until your name was on back of a Devils jersey. After that night, it seemed to me that things had gotten better, and then that night came, the night that changed everything. That night really did change everything, and I'm not sure if it was a good or bad thing yet, but I'm leaning toward good. After that night I was so much more emotionally attached to you than I should have been, and it was around that time that you seemed to be drifting further and further away. The day you broke up with me, you quite honestly broke my heart, tore it into a million pieces, and it took me weeks before I was able to even try to start piecing it back together. As time continued to move on things in my life started to change, and then I finally got the news. I know you're still wondering what in the hell I'm talking about, and I want you to know that what I'm about to tell you doesn't have to change anything between us. We broke up, and we broke up because you didn't love me anymore, I understand that. I'm not writing this letter in some desperate attempt to get you back, but I'm writing because I had to tell you about this somehow, and I'm too much of a coward to do it face to face. I'm pregnant, just a little over two and a half months. I can't tell you if we're having a boy or a girl yet, it's still too early to tell, but I'm going to take care of it; I mean not it 'it' but through all nine months, until it's born. I think I might keep the baby as well, Carlisle and Esme have offered to help me take care of everything, and I think I might take them up on that. This letter doesn't have to change anything for you; this letter is my way of letting you know about everything that is going on, and from here you can make your decision. If you want to be involved, which I hope you will, you know where to find me. If not, well you don't have to reply. _

_Yours Bella. _

I wasn't sure why this was in Emmett's bag, and I really wasn't sure why this letter wasn't given to me six years ago. I had a kid out there, a kid I knew nothing about, with Bella. Bella, the person I lied to because someone made me believe that I should be focusing on my career, not some silly little girl. I was wrong, so wrong to lie to her, and I never should have left, but my mistakes were mistakes. Now I find out I have a child out there, a little boy or little girl, a baby who was five now.

I wiped the tears that had started to form in my eyes, and sat down. The thing that pissed me off and surprised me most was that Emmett had hid it. Emmett my best friend since child hood knew all along, he knew and he never told me. Pushing my self from the bench I clutched Emmett's stupid fucking tape in my right hand and the letter in my left.

He was sitting down on the bench out on the ice talking with Jasper Hale, the newbie, Sidney, Ben, and Kris. "Dude, I was starting to think that you got lost in there." He joked as I chucked his tape at him as hard as I possibly could. "What the fuck!" Emmett said shielding his face. I held the letter up and his eyes widened, "where did you get that?"

"I should be asking you the same fucking thing! I was getting your tape like you asked me, and your bag fell. As I was putting everything back inside I noticed this on the ground. The funny thing was, my name was on it, not yours. So I opened it. How the hell could you keep this from me! For nearly six years! You knew that she showed up, and this letter, what were you going to do with it? Did you ever plan on giving it to me?" I yelled, and I knew I had to be crying right now. Emmett said nothing, just looking at the ground, avoiding the situation, like he had when we were children. "Own up to your mistakes Emmett! Tell everyone how the only girl I've loved showed up here, tell them how you kept this letter from me! Did you know what was in this letter?" I asked as I looked around. Every member of the team, every member of coaching staff, had stopped what they were doing to listen to us.

"Of course I knew!" he yelled "I knew the minute I saw her that she was pregnant! And I knew that she was seventeen years old and was just going to get an abortion because she had no one! She was alone Edward, and the moment the people who took care of her found out, they were going to kick her out. Having a baby would have ruined your career, just like staying with her would have. I told you to leave her for a reason, and you were naïve enough to listen. If I would have given you the letter there was no way you would have stayed, you would have done the honorable thing and went to her. You would have married her and stayed there, you would have played house, and you would have had nothing! I did you a favor by keeping this letter from you! Look at you now, a big time NHL player who is making millions of dollars a year, you should be thanking me right now." He spat out.

Before I knew what was happening I dropped the letter to the ground and threw a right hook at Emmett. My fist collided with his jaw and he fell back, quickly getting up, and we started to fight. It took Jasper, Ben, Sidney, Marc, Kris, and two coaches to pull us off each other. Sidney, Kris, and Jasper held me back as I spat blood on to the ice.

"You're right, I would have asked her to marry me. But I wouldn't have quit my job, she wouldn't have let me, she knew how much hockey meant to me, she knew how much I loved playing, it was my life. You're right about another thing though, I was naïve enough to listen to you and breaking up with her. I shouldn't have, we saw a future with each other, and by making that decision I screwed my life up. But don't think I will ever thank you for what you did, your ruined my life. Not only that, but you've ruined our friendship, we've been friends since childhood. I don't appreciate you keeping this from me, because in turn you've kept me from my family. MY FUCKING FAMILY!" I yelled wiping away tears.

Rather than looking ashamed of his actions, he just laughed. "The stupid bitch probably got an abortion. Seventeen year old girl, pregnant in high school; people are going to make fun of her. She probably couldn't handle it, got an abortion, do you really think she kept it?" he yelled as I lunged at him, Sidney and Jasper grabbing me again, as I struggled to get away.

"She kept the baby you ass hole! She kept it! She lost her parents at fifteen, do you really think she would miss out on the chance to have a family? Another thing, she would never be so heartless to kill an innocent sole, you're an asshole. God Emmett, you were supposed to be my best friend, we've been friends since we were kids. We were drafted together, we went to the same college, and you do this? I can't believe you" I said turning around and walking back in to the main locker rooms.

I didn't know what I was going to do, tonight was an important game. We were playing the Devils, and I couldn't exactly leave hours before a game to go track down an old girlfriend, and a child, I didn't even know where they were. I knew tonight Bella would be watching from home, she had always been a Devils fan, which in turned pissed me right off, and I doubted that anything had changed. "Edward" I heard from behind me to see Sidney trying to catch up with me.

"What's up?"

"Emmett had no right to do that, but I promise I'm going to help you track Bella and that kid of yours down, no matter what it takes. If she really did keep the kid like you said, then he or she, well they deserve to have a father. I know you, you'll do anything to try and take care of them. Just, don't make me regret it."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two  
Bella Swan  
December 2012**

Well after picking Logan up from hockey practice I was eventually persuaded to stop at McDonalds on the way home. So happy meal, hockey bag, and five year old on hand I walked into the townhouse ready to collapse on the couch and stay there for the rest of the evening. "Hurry up and chow down buddy, you need to shower before the game starts." I said setting his meal down on the island.

I knew Logan, or well both of us were excited for tonight's game. It was the first game in a three game series against the Penguins, and I knew that Logan was hoping for tickets to the second game in early February. After making sure he ate and showered, the two of us cuddled in a fuzzy blanket together and turned the hockey game on.

The game was an unusual one, in just the first and second period the Devils scored four times. The Penguins were getting calls left and right for things they knew not to do, and their passing was horrible, they weren't playing as a team. As the third period started the Penguins hadn't started to play any better, which was good for New Jersey.

I of course found my eyes drawn to one player, the player that I didn't need to pay attention too. Tonight was different; it was like they had traveled back in time. Edward had been in the penalty box six times tonight, much like when we had first separated, except it wasn't for getting in scraps with other players, but calls such as tripping and hooking. Something was wrong, I knew that, he was distracted with something, so was the rest of the team. As immature as it was for me to say I really didn't care what was wrong with him. Edward took the easy way out of our situation, he abandoned us, and I had zero sympathy for cowards like him.

By the end of the game not much, or anything, had improved for the Penguins. The Devils finished the game in a shut-out, six to zero, and the Penguins skated away with their heads hung low. Our boys were excited about the win, they had played really well, but it was to easy for them, little to no effort was put out on the Penguins behalf. There was something going on with their team, but rather than let it affect their game they needed to figure their shit out, until then, we were going to take advantage of their screw up.

I leaned my head back on the couch before looking down. Logan was fast asleep on my lap, and somewhere between the second and third period the little man must have fallen asleep. It had been a long day for him, first school, then homework, and hockey, he was probably beyond tired, as was I. Picking him up I tried my best to cradle him as I moved up the stairs. He was getting heavier, and I knew soon enough there was no way I would be able to carry him upstairs to tuck him in. I knew after everything that had happened today I shouldn't have allowed him to stay up for the game, but Devils vs. Penguins games were the only ones I allowed him to stay up for.

As I laid him down on the bottom bunk of his bed I kissed his forehead and turned to walk out of the room. As I leaned against the door frame Logan turned and his eyes fluttered open. "Sorry to wake you. Night buddy, I love you."

"Mom, why don't I have a dad like Alex or Josh" he asked. I was stunned, I didn't know how to answer that question, not truthfully at least, and I wanted to answer it as honestly as I could.

I made my way over to his bed and sat down next to him, "your dad left long before you were born. But I want you to know that I love you more than anything, and that's what counts, okay?" I said brushing his hair out of his eyes.

He nodded, "I love you too" rolling back over I walked toward the door, a tear falling from my eye. Walking in to the kitchen to try and clean up a little a sank to the floor. This was only the beginning of the questions, Logan was five, as he got older the questions were going to start to be more inquisitive. I didn't know what I would do, I didn't know what to do now, I didn't know how to stop these questions from ruling my life.

Slowly picking myself up I walked around the downstairs portion of the townhouse. Picking up toys, and placing things where they needed to be I just stopped and stood in the middle of the living room. I had done well for myself, I had a baby at seventeen, I graduated high school, went to college, and how I had my own place and a successful business. I was a good mother, and, I honestly didn't know what I had did to deserve all of this.

Walking from the living room to the front hallway I grabbed Logan's hockey bag and dragged it in to the laundry room. Taking the jersey out of his bag I tried my best to get the smell out without having to stick it into the washing machine. After that I grabbed the bottle of Febreze and sprayed his gear, and shoved it back in to his bag.

As it got later and later I continued to do more house work, it was the perfect distraction from what I didn't want to think about, but that didn't stop me. I hated that Logan didn't have that father figure in his life, I knew Carlisle tried his best to be around, but it wasn't really the same. It sucked being pretty much alone except for a few people; my parents were dead, they had been since I was fifteen. I was thankful for Esme and Carlisle, without them I would have been sent into the system, they were my saviors.

But none of that helped Logan. I didn't want him to grow up with only one parent, but Edward wanted nothing to do with either of us. He was so stupid to leave me, no us, behind. Around midnight I finally made the decision to call it a night, I had to be up at six thirty to make sure Logan was ready for school, and then I had to be at the Café to get everything settled. It was holiday season, and everyone was pouring in to stay out of the cold, or get something warm to drink, so we were busy. I often wished that Edward, or someone else, was around to help me with Logan, it would definitely make things a lot easier.

By eight thirty the next morning I had dropped Logan off at Kindergarten and made my way to the bakery where my friend and manager Angela was already in the kitchen making pastries as the other workers were out front opening. "Sorry I'm late Angela. Logan didn't want to get out of bed this morning. I probably shouldn't have allowed him to stay up for the hockey game last night." I said with a laugh.

"Bella you know that it's not a problem. Logan is your first priority, I can handle the shop when you need me too." She said causing me to smile; well at least I had a little help at the shop.

**Edward Masen  
December 17, 2012**

The next morning I woke up to a pounding on my door. I wasn't one to get up at six o'clock in the morning any day, especially after a game, I liked my sleep. "Edward, I know you're in there! Get your ass out of bed!" a voice I recognized as Sidney's yelled.

I groaned but made my way to the door where he was still pounding on my door. "Shove it Sid! I do have neighbors, and I'm sure they don't appreciate you pounding on my door." I said as I opened the door in a pair of pajama pants and no shirt. "What the hell do you want, it's six in the morning." I said opening the door wide enough for him to walk inside.

I made my way into the kitchen to make myself some coffee, sitting on the counter.

"Hoboken" was all he said.

"Hoboken? What the hell are you talking about, Hoboken?"

"Bella. She still lives in New Jersey, somewhere in Hoboken. I guess she owns this little café/pastry shop in Hoboken, it's called Eclipse Café."

Raising my right eyebrow I looked at him, "and how do you know this? I mean she couldn't have been that easy to find."

"Dude, I have friends all over the country. One of them happens to live in Hoboken, and recognized the name. He said she owns the Eclipse Café on the corner of First Street and Park Avenue, he didn't know much after that, he's been in a couple times and has seen her, but they've never held a conversation." He said as I leaned my head on the back of the cabinet.

"What do I do from here, I mean, do I talk to coach and see if they can give me time off? I know that there are a lot of a big games coming up, but after last night I don't know if I can continue to play without letting this rule my life. You saw what happened last night, my head was clouded, all of our heads were, we let what happened in the locker room bother us. Jersey won in a shut out, I can't let that happen again, but if I don't go looking for them I don't know what is going to happen."

He smiled, just smiled and said nothing for a minute. "You're in luck. Coach was watching as everything took place yesterday, and I'm assuming that is the reason he didn't go bat shit crazy after the game yesterday. I went in to the locker room before coming here and told him everything, he agreed to give you two weeks off, and as long as you make it back by the game against the Senators in January, you're fine. This is your chance to connect with your family, see what is going to happen, reconnect with Bella, your kid; this is your chance."

I looked down and ran my hand through my hair, my one nervous quirk. "It's been almost six years Sidney. What if she doesn't want anything to do with me? I broke her heart when she was seventeen years old, and I know that she probably thinks that I abandoned her when she needed me most. I don't know how to convince her that Emmett kept the letter from me. That first day she stayed with me in Pittsburgh she met you and Emmett; I had drive all night because I wanted to see her, and then I brought her back." I ran my hand through my hair again. "Did you know that that day was the first time she had ever been in a hockey arena? God to see her get comfortable on that ice and then just be so playful, she was so happy, then you guys came in. It hurts to know Emmett could do something like that to me. We've been friends since we were kids, and I used to think nothing could come between us. I guess that was naïve of me, a lot of decisions I made in the last couple years have been naïve."

"In due time things will straighten themselves out. Right now the most you can do is try to explain everything to her. Tell her the truth, and whether she believes it or not, just see where it goes from there. Take this time Edward, go find her, talk with her, just don't sit here and think about what could have been. Don't mull things over, the more time you take, the less likely you are to do something."

"What time does my flight leave?"

"Noon, but be there an hour before. Your hotel is already book, right in Hoboken, so all you need to do is check in and start your search. Make sure you're back here in two weeks." He said turning to walk out of my kitchen and out of my apartment.

"Sidney, thank you, for everything. Because of you I might actually get to spend Christmas with my family."

He nodded, just nodded. "You're a good guy Edward, and you don't deserve all of this hurt. Just make sure you get her back here, I always thought she was good for you."

By two o'clock that day I was checking in to my hotel. It was nice, not to fancy, but comfortable, and I'm glad that they hadn't gone overboard and booked me a suite. But the room didn't matter; I was here to find Bella. Tonight, rather than going to look I was going to look around. The first thing I did was shower, I hated having airplane all over me; after that a restaurant for dinner, and roaming around the city.

By seven thirty I was walking past Eclipse Café, it was still open and the final customers of the day were trickling out, but I didn't dare step inside. It would be my first stop tomorrow; I just hoped that she would be here. As I peered through the windows I realized how homey it seemed. There were couches, chairs, and tables scattered throughout the café, but not too many to make it crowded. Lamps sat on either side of the couches, and chandeliers hung over the tables, they were all dimmed so the light wasn't too harsh. Behind the cash register sat a wall of complete chalk board, specials and meals, pastries and coffees were marked, and I couldn't wait to get a closer look the next day.

From what I could see it reminded me of Bella. A place you could be comfortable, with good food, sweets, and coffee, three things that were important to Bella. Shoving my hands in my pockets I walked back in the direction of my hotel. I needed to figure out what I was going to say when I saw her again, but was that something I could even plan?

As the elevator made its way to the twelfth floor I stared into the reflected walls of the elevator. I didn't know the man who I was staring at anymore, he was a shell of the person he used to be and it was time for him to find himself.

The moment I stepped foot in my room I got changed and went straight to bed. I was physically and emotionally exhausted with the events of the last couple days, and to top it off I was stressed beyond belief. What would she think of me coming back? After all of these years, it wasn't going to be easy, especially now that there was a child involved. A child, it was weird to think I was a father, but despite the fact that I had helped to create said child I wasn't really a father. I had done nothing other than get Bella pregnant, where was I during those nine months, when she needed help and I was missing? I was a sorry excuse for a father, and maybe I didn't know, but I was still a horrible person. For breaking her heart, for being naïve, and for listening to someone I thought had my best interest in mind; for the last six years my life had been a lie.

As I got ready the next morning I couldn't help but yawn. I had gotten little to no sleep, and I knew that it would only make for a terrible day, but I needed to find her. After showering and brushing my teeth I pulled on a pair of dark wash jeans and I sweater. Pair of casual shoes, and a pea coat were next followed by a black scarf, hopefully I would be warm enough as I walked through town. Deciding to just grab breakfast at Bella's café I headed out and by ten thirty I was there.

As I walked inside there were more than enough people scattered throughout and the girl at the cash register, wasn't Bella. "Hi, I'm Angela what can I get you." She asked when it was finally my turn to order.

"Um, a medium coffee, two cream two sugar, and a chocolate chip muffin." She started punching prices into the register, allowing me to awkward stand there and contemplate how I was going to ask her about Bella. "Can I ask you a question?" she looked up at me quizzically then finally answered,

"Sure"

"Is Bella Swan here, I came here to look for her." She smiled as I handed a twenty over but shook her head.

"You actually just missed her, she opened early and waited for me then left. Her son has a game today, so she's at the arena."

I nodded, "which arena?"

"The only one in town, the Hoboken Community Center. It's just a mile or so from here." She said handing me my change and items I ordered. We said nothing else and I quickly ate my muffin as I went over what she just said. I had a son, a little boy who would probably be five years old by now. I wondered so many things, what he looked like, his likes dislikes, favorite subject in school if he had one, his name, birthday; all the little things I should know.

As I walked toward the arena I called Sidney, he would want to know all of this, or well I think he did. Right now I didn't care, I just needed to tell someone."

"Hey! Did you find her yet?" Sidney said as he answered his phone.

"Not yet, or well sort of. I went to her shop today, and the girl at the register said she was at the Hoboken Community Center; her son has a game today. A son, Sidney, I have a son, how awesome is that?"

I could hear him chuckle, "a little boy, that's amazing Edward. You have to send me a picture when you finally meet him; he's probably an Edward Masen look alike. Everyone here, minus Emmett, wants to know what is going on, you have to keep us in the loop." He said making me laugh.

"I'm at the arena now Sid, but I'll call you back when I know something else." As I looked at the building in front of me I smiled. My present and future was somewhere inside this building, and I just knew that it would hold something great for me.

**Bella Swan  
December 18, 2012**

"I didn't know what to say when he asked, I was completely stunned. I mean, what do you tell a kid when his father completely dumped you flat and let without a word? I don't know what to say or do anymore, and Logan is only five. What happens when he gets old, I know what I told him won't hold over for much longer." I said to Rose, Alice, and Esme, Carlisle was unfortunately working today.

"What did you tell him honey?" Esme asked.

"That Edward left before he was born and that I loved him more than anything which was what counted."

"Have you ever thought about maybe going to talk to him again? I mean with their schedule being online you can plan when and where. It would be on your conditions, and maybe he's had a change of heart. You said you gave the letter to Emmett right?" Alice asked causing me to nod. "Is there a chance that Emmett would have kept the letter from Edward, meaning he never got it? I know Edward is the bad guy in this situation Bella, but I never pegged him as the guy to leave his girlfriend while she was pregnant."

"I don't think so, and ex-girlfriend, it's not the same." I said giving her a pointed look. "And besides, Emmett has been Edward's best friend for years. I don't think he would have done that to him." I said as the four of us sat down in the arena as the second period of Logan's game started.

"There you are! I thought that maybe you decided to skip out on your sons game!" I said as Ryan Taylor, the only other single parent on the team, said as he sat down in front of us. Ryan's son Alex was one of Logan's best friends, and Ryan treated Logan like a son, it was nice to have some play the fatherly roll once and a while.

"You know my life revolved around hockey, maybe missing one game wouldn't be so bad." I laughed, looking up at the ice for a moment. "How are you?"

"Crazy busy, I never thought running a five year old everywhere on top of work could se so hectic. There is no time for anything anymore." He said causing me to laugh I knew the feeling.

"I know what you mean, if I'm not at the shop I'm here at the arena. And if we're not here, I'm taking Logan to school, or to get new gear, and the little time we spend at the house we're either watching hockey or sleeping." Out of the corner of my eye I could have swore I saw Edward, but as I turned around no one was there. This day was just getting weirder and weirder.

We didn't say much more as the second period drew into the third period and with fifty seconds left in the game, and the other team with a tripping call, our boys were playing nicely, hoping for one more goal to win it. We were tied at two, and suddenly Logan and Alex were racing up the ice after the puck had been cleared. Logan passed to Alex, no open shots so the puck went back to Logan, with a pull back Logan slapped the puck as hard as he could, his stick shattered but the puck made its way over the goalies left shoulder and into the net. The buzzer sounded and everyone started to cheer, it was nice to see the boys win, though they usually did.

After shaking hands the boys made their way into the locker room, and Alice, Rose, Esme, and I went to stand outside the locker room to wait for Logan. "MOM, MOM!" Logan yelled as he dragged his bag behind him. "DID YOU SEE THAT?" he yelled as Rose gave him a high five and picked him up. "Woah" he said confusing all of us.

"What?"

"Edward Masen is over by the doors, and he's look at me!" he said as I spun around and stared directly into the eyes of my son's father. My breath caught, and suddenly it felt like the whole world was crashing down around me.

"Logan, please go with Auntie Alice and Rose, and Nana Esme" I said quickly as he looked at me.

"But moooom" he whined. "He's famous, can I please go meet him?" he asked as I shook my head.

"Logan just go with Alice and Rose and Nana, I won't be far behind." I said as Rose set him down and took his bag. Esme and Alice did their best to distract him, but I knew he was staring at Edward. Once they were out of sight I walked over to Edward. This couldn't be happening, it was all just a dream and when I opened my eyes he would be gone, but that wasn't the case.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three  
Edward Masen  
December 18, 2012**

After getting off the phone with Sidney I ran the mile to the community center where they were. By the time I got there the team was in the middle of the third period, and I found myself sitting in a seat at the back, hiding behind a pillar. Down toward the front I could see Bella, Rose, Alice, and Esme talking with a man who I couldn't see, as they tried their best to talk and watch the game at the same time.

Suddenly everyone started to make a ton of noise and two boys skated around looking for an opening. The back of their sweaters read Taylor and Swan, and they were both exceptional players. The Swan boy, my son, was a defensemen, but from what I was watching he was fast, and tiny which always worked toward his advantage, but he was also a goal scorer. Before anyone knew what was happened he took a slap shot and shattered his stick, but the puck went right over the goalies shoulder and into the goal. I didn't know what to say, I was so proud to be here, to watch him score, to at least have a chance to see him play, he played like I did at his age.

As people started to clear out to go home and to collect their kids I stayed in my hiding place behind the pillar. I didn't want to make a big seen of my being here, so I waited until most people were gone, and wandered over to the door where most parents were. Suddenly a little boy ran out of the locker room with wet hair and ran in to Bella's arms.

Let me tell you, Sidney was completely wrong when he said that he would be a Edward Masen look alike. The little boy was of average height for his age, but more than anything he looked like Bella. He had this long curly mess of brown hair that hung in his face and over his ears; he had Bella's nose and lips, but as I looked closely I saw that he had my eyes. I gulped, he had something that actually made him a part of me, minus half of my DNA, but something that people would recognize if we were ever together. More people left so I wasn't looking through crowds to watch them, and as Rosalie picked him up his eyes connected with mine.

He said something to all of them and Bella twisted around so she could see me. Her eyes widened and she gulped, she wasn't happy that I was here. "Logan, go with Alice and Rose, and Nana Esme please." I heard her say, but the boy wouldn't budge.

"But moooom, he's famous can I got meet him?" he asked again, making me confused. It was obvious that he knew who I was, but he didn't know I was his father. He knew me as the NHL player, which didn't surprise me. I didn't expect Bella to tell him, why should she? I hadn't ever been in his life, and up until this moment she probably thought that I wanted nothing to do with them.

"Logan just go with Alice, Rose, and Nana, I won't be far behind." Rosalie took his bag and his hand leading him out the door, and Bella and I watched until he was out of sight. It was then that she approached me. It was really the first time that I had taken a good look at her. She no longer looked like she did at seventeen, there were no ruminates of baby fat, she was just a little taller, and she looked like a woman. Her hair was now shoulder length, and had an auburn tint. She wore more make-up, but not too much; looking at her made me realize just how much I had missed her.

She looked pretty and simple in a pair of dark wash jeans, a flannel shirt with a puffy blue vest, and a pair of Ugg boots, it was simple and Bella. She moved nervously from heel to toe and back as she bit her lip, all signs that made me realize how uncomfortable she was standing here.

She looked around for a moment before the man she was talking to earlier came over to her. "Hey where's Logan, I thought we were all going to grab something to eat after the game."

She gulped again, "Um, can we take a rain check Ryan? Something came up" her eyes motioned toward me, and the guy, Ryan, nodded. "Good game Alex" she said.

"Of course, I'm just a phone call away if you need anything, remember that." He said as he gave her a hug. The hug, though it looked, as it meant nothing to either of them made me jealous. I wished I could be the one to do that, to be the one to comfort her when she needed comforting, but I couldn't. I wasn't going to let anything get in my way, I had already let someone ruin my life once, I wasn't going to let it happen again.

She looked down then looked at me. "You look good" then she rolled her eyes, looking around. "No scratch that, what the hell are you doing here Edward?"

"You look great, beautiful" I said causing her to roll her eyes.

"Complementing me isn't going to work, not even just a little. So if you're here to complement me, leave. You left once, it shouldn't be hard for you to do a second time." The Bella in front of me wasn't the Bella I remember, she left me speechless, because I didn't know how to deal with this Bella, but at the same time she intrigued me, I wanted to stay.

"No, that's not why I'm here. We need to talk." I said as she rose both her eye brows and laughed.

"Talk? You want to talk?" she laughed again. "Well, I thought us talking was something that should have happened five years ago, but things don't always go as planned. I thought that maybe, the father of my son was going act like the adult I thought he was and try to be a father, but no, he decided his career was more important that his family. Now look at where he landed himself, standing in front of the women who decided his fate. Its funny how things turn out, huh?" alright, angry Bella was not pretty, she was scary but I needed to do this.

"Bella, if I would have known!"

"What do you mean, would have known? Six years ago I went to the arena and handed Emmett a letter, a letter that told you everything, a letter you read and never gave any indication you cared around. So everything you're telling me right now is a crock of shit, go back to Pittsburgh Edward, you're not needed here."

She didn't say anything else as she headed toward the doors, and just as she was about to push it open I yelled, "I didn't know! Emmett never gave me the letter, I found out two days ago." She said nothing, but looked down and continued to walk. She didn't believe me, she thought I was lying, who could blame her. For six years she had thought I wanted nothing to do with them, and now here I was telling her that I knew nothing and I wanted them.

I ran out of the building and watched as she walked over to everyone who was waiting for her. She said nothing as she picked Logan up and buckled him in the car, and soon after she just drove away. Nothing was said, no glances exchanged, and I don't know how much longer I stood there until I finally kicked a rock across the parking lot. I didn't deserve to be part of my sons life, but I wanted too; I had lost what was important to me long ago and I hoped that she would grant me the chance to try and be that person once more.

**Bella Swan  
December 19, 2012**

The morning after the Edward incident, which I had taken to calling it, Logan and I were due at Carlisle and Esme's like every Sunday for brunch. After spending half an hour trying to wake Logan up I started to get ready. I was definitely ready to spend a day in leggings, not stressing about what had gone down; something we all knew I was going to do anyway.

Pulling on a pair of gray leggings, an off white tank top, and an off the shoulder blue long sleeve shirt I found a pair of socks so my feet could be toasty warm. My boots were lying on the floor of my walk in closet, and as I fixed my hair and make up I could hear Logan messing around in his room.

"Buddy what are you doing?" I asked popping my head out into the hallway.

"I'm looking for my batman, I can't find him!" he said as he ran out of his room still in pajamas.

"You left it at Nana and Pop's last weekend remember? He'll he there when we get there. And get dressed!" I laugh as he groaned. I went back in to my room to finish getting ready, and I knew he wouldn't be ready when I walked out just a couple minutes later.

"Alright, morning sunshine!"

"I want to go back to bed, it's to early to be up." He said making me laugh, he used that excuse every Sunday, but we both knew that if it was a normal weekend where we didn't have to go to his grandparents he would be up at this time. "So about last night." He said making me groan. Sometimes this kid made me ask myself how old he really was. He seemed so much wiser than a five year old should be.

"What about last night?" I asked him as if I didn't remember what had happened.

"Um the famous hockey player!" there was the duh tone, "I know we don't like the Penguins, but he was FAMOUS."

"Oh, that last night. There are some things you're too young to understand bud. But Edward and I, we used to be friends. Something happened, and we don't talk anymore."

"You used to be friends? Cool!" he said wiggling out of my arms as I started to chase him down the stairs. "Can't you make up with him? I want to meet him, like as bad as Auntie Alice wants to go shopping." He said making me laugh at his analogy, the kid was smart.

"It's not that easy Logan, some things are just to difficult to fix."

"Not if you try really, really, really hard." Sometimes I wished I could be like a five year old, where the way to fix a problem was sharing your snack at snack time, or giving a juice box away. The grown up world sucked, a lot, and I just wish I could go back to nap time, and dolls, where boys pulled your hair and had cooties.

Carlisle and Esme lived about twenty minutes outside of Hoboken in the same house Alice grew up in, and the one I practically lived in until it actually became my home. It was massive, with three stories made of all concrete, but in a pretty way. We walked up the path to the massive wooden door and lion door knocker that Logan loved. This was my home, Carlisle and Esme had made sure it was. After everything that had happened in my life they were there for me, and I thanked them for it every day.

When I first got pregnant with Logan they were there for me, they stood by my side, gave me help, and told me I could stay there until I finished college. They were my rocks, I didn't have Edward around, and when he never answered my letter it was as if my heart broke all over again. The day we first met in Pittsburgh was the day my life changed. The way his green eyes pierced mine, how they looked into my soul, I knew somehow, that he was the one; I guess I was wrong about that. I honestly had no clue who he was, and I think that was one of the winning qualities in me, I didn't care that he played a sport professionally, and money didn't matter to me. He held out his hand and introduced himself, a spark running up both of our hands, we were connected that way. We didn't exchange numbers, and it wasn't until the following day where I ran into him again, this time at the mall, that we exchanged numbers. It took me a grand total of three days of texting to fall completely in love with him; after that the rest was history.

Our relationship was different, I couldn't see him everyday as I was a senior in high school, and eventually things evened out. The first time we slept together was when I was ready, he didn't push, and for me it was awkward, but he did his best to make it good for me. He told me afterward that it was beautiful, and he loved me, that in no way did he find it awkward, to him that wasn't how he saw it. Two weeks later he broke my heart, and it took me a while before I was able to face the world again. Then I started getting sick, naively I thought it was because of the copious amounts of sweets I had consumed when I was lying in my room crying and wallowing in self pity. I found out two weeks later I was pregnant, pregnant and alone, oh how I felt like I was in a teen drama; boy leaves girl, girl gets pregnant, what the hell was I going to do?

Then I wrote the letter, the letter I thought that would solve my problem, only did it make it worse? I should have refused Emmett, told him I needed to see Edward face to face. I would have known for sure he got the letter. Was he telling the truth when he said he only found out a couple days ago? Did Emmett never give him the letter? I needed to know the truth; I needed to go to the source. I pulled into Carlisle and Esme's at the perfect time. Esme was walking in the door and I got out as Logan ran inside, I needed to find out the truth.

"I'm sorry, but there is something I need to do. Can you watch him please?" Esme asked no questions, just nodded as I ran back to the car and back out of the driveway. After five hours of straight driving I found myself in Pittsburgh, back at the place that determined my fate six years ago.

I pounded on the door that led to the locker rooms, and a boy with shaggy blonde hair opened the door. "Excuse me Miss, but is there something I can help you with?"

"I'm looking for someone," I said as Sidney walked up behind him.

"Bella, what are you going here?" he asked me with a confused look on his face.

"Where is Emmett?" I asked shoving past both of them. I looked in the locker rooms and weight room, gathering a crowd behind me, before I finally found him on the ice with a few other players and coaches. "EMMETT" I yelled as he cut on his skates and stopped by the goal.

I ignored the fact that I wasn't supposed to have street shoes on the ice and made my way over to him, Sidney was close behind him. "Uh, Bella, what are you doing here?" he asked me nervously.

"I need to know the truth. When I brought that letter here six years ago and asked you to give it to Edward, did you ever give it to him?" Emmett said nothing, making it known that he was guilty, but I needed the truth. "Please, I need to hear it from you. Tell me the truth, Emmett."

He shook his head, "No, I could tell you were pregnant when you showed up. I knew Edward, he would have given up everything to be with you. I couldn't let him do that, not after how hard he has worked to get away from everything in Chicago, not after what happened when we were kids." I said nothing I just stared at him awe struck, how could his best friend do this to him. "He was never supposed to find out, and you were supposed to think he wanted nothing to do with your or the baby. I didn't think you were going to keep it, I thought you would give it up or get rid of it." He said as I choked out a sob.

I knew the entire team, coaching staff, managers, and everyone was watching us. I was heartbroken, I was angry, and before I knew what I was doing I slapped him across the face. Before I could do anything else Sidney grabbed me around the waist, "he's not worth it," he whispered in my ear as I let out another sob.

"You had no right to do that you asshole! I was seventeen years old, I needed him and you took him away from me, from us! You should have never done that! And think, what thinking went on Emmett? You've been hit in the head with a few to many hockey pucks, because you didn't think! You did the things you did for your own selfish reasons! As a matter of fact Emmett, our SON is in Hoboken with friends, living with me. I was never going to give him up! He was the last piece of Edward I had left." I half yelled half sobbed.

"You were a stupid little girl who didn't know any better. You gave up everything to raise a child who nobody wanted! Your parents were dead, you knew nothing about being a parent, what kind of life is that for a child? He would have been better off with parents who knew what they were doing, parents who were old enough to be parents. Not some seventeen year old girl who was naïve enough to let a hockey player knock her up!" he yelled as I lunged toward him, Sidney tightened his grip on me.

"You know nothing about me Emmett, don't try to believe that you do! Maybe I was seventeen, but I had a good support system, I had a home. I finished high school, on time, I went to college and finished on time! I graduated this past May, I have a successful business that I run, a house of my own, and I can support my son with my own money. I had people who loved me and my son, people who helped me get through school so I could have a life I wanted for the both of us. I'm doing fine with out Edward, until he showed up at my son's hockey game last night telling me he knew nothing. This whole world is turning my life upside down! I should have never gotten involved with all of this, its making me crazy!" I choked out, pulling myself from Sidney's grasp.

"One of you needs to tell Edward he can come home now, nothing can change. You ruined it for him Emmett, I hope you're happy with yourself." I said walking off the ice, and then running out of the locker room. I didn't know if I was telling them the truth about calling Edward off, but I needed time to think, time to figure out what the hell I was going to do about all of this. My life was a mess.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four  
Bella Swan**

After running from the locker rooms I ran to my car, I didn't know where I was going, but I knew I was too hysterical to try and drive back to New Jersey. Suddenly there was a knock on my window making me jump. Standing there was Sidney, "are you okay?" he asked me as I sniffled.

"I don't know," I said running my hand through my hair. "I just, I don't know what I'm going to do now, this, all of this, it's so complicated." He moved around to the passengers side of my vehicle and climbed in so I wasn't letting the heat go.

"You should talk to him, just him with no one else around, it might make things better. Just please don't hurt him Bella, I'm sure that statement isn't allowed, but, these last six years have been horrible for him; and when he found out he was a father, despite how angry he was at Emmett, he seemed happy. I've been talking with him, and he feels betrayed by everyone."

"I know the feeling. When he broke up with me, I didn't know what was going to happen with me. He was the first good thing that had happened to me since my parents had died. I though he was the one, but I guess like every decision in our relationship it was naïve of me. I used to sit in my room after the break up and just continuously ask myself, 'why me, what have I done to deserve this?' I never got any answers. I found out a month after we broke up that I was pregnant with Logan, and I didn't want to do something that made people think I was pulling this card to make Edward stay with me. The first couple weeks I had made the decision to keep Logan from Edward, then I realized that even if he wanted nothing to do with us, he needed to know."

Sidney didn't say anything, but it looked like he was in deep though. "For the next year after everything between you and Edward ended things he wasn't the person I remembered. He didn't laugh anymore, he didn't smile, he constantly got in fights, he was just plain angry, all the time. I think it was around thanksgiving the following year that he showed up acting like himself again. No one questioned it, no one wanted to. We don't know what made him change his mind, but we're all glad he did, it was as if he finally put the past behind him. We all know that he still loves you Bella, he acts like he's happy to persuade us, but we know he's not. His world revolves around you, it always has."

I looked at him, "I can't be that seventeen year old girl he fell in love with, I've grown up. This ideal he has, it's the old Bella; I'm not perfect, I can't be, I'm different, I have a kid, a business, things and people I love. I can't pack up and leave, I have responsibilities."

Neither of us said anything, soon my cell phone started to ring, but I ignored it. "I should go. I have to pick Logan up from Carlisle and Esme's tonight, he has school in the morning. And I have a long day ahead of me." I said as he nodded.

"If you want to talk to him, he's stay at the Hilton hotel right in Hoboken. He'll be there until after New Years, the fourth, and I know he wants to spend the holidays with you." He said causing me to nod. "Just think about it."

He climbed out the car and walked back into the training facility without looking back. It took me a good five minutes before I started my journey back to New Jersey. I didn't know what was being held for me, but something made me want to go back, something, or maybe someone important.

**Edward Masen  
December 19, 2012**

I wasn't sure that I completely knew what I wanted in life any longer. Before I found out that I had a family out there in the world all I wanted to do was play hockey. My career was also something I loved, something I didn't want to stop, so why should I. When I found that letter it was as if everything had shifted, as if I knew what I wanted before hand was wrong, and this was everything I was hiding. I wanted to be with my son, with his beautiful mother, I wanted the three of us to be a family. After what happened yesterday afternoon, I didn't know what my future looked like. It was in Bella's hands; I was just that idiot who was standing in the road staring at what he missed out on.

I was staring at the closet in the hotel room, my suitcase had been unpacked because I was supposed to be staying for two weeks, but would Bella ever let me see our son? Maybe it would just be smart of me to go home, Bella didn't want me around, I should just respect her wishes. Running my hand through my hair I realized that I needed to get out of this room. I couldn't give up, not already, it had been a day, there was still time. "This room is making me crazy, I need to get out of here." Pulling jacket on and grabbing my wallet I left the room and started to wander through town.

As I walked through town I thought back to the year I turned fifteen. After those initial months with my permit, and being taught how to drive I finally got my license. Which meant my own car, and no longer having to rely on my parents driver to take me where I wanted. I was able to do what I wanted, and go where I wanted, it allowed me the escape that I wanted. No matter what had happened I always found myself at the arena where I played hockey, any fight with my parents, bad grade, girl breaking up with me, another missed birthday by my parents who didn't care, hockey was there for me. And here I was, thinking of running away from it.

Once more I found myself at a hockey arena, the same arena where my heart continued to break the night before. "You looking for something, you seem lost?" a familiar girl said.

"Um, could I get some ice time? As well as a pair of skates, a stick, and some pucks?" I asked her as she nodded. She said nothing but grabbed a stick and some pucks as she asked me for my size.

"You look like someone with a problem; I remember back when I played there was another kid and myself who always found ourselves at the rink when something was wrong. God I loved those days." She said as I took a closer look at her.

She had straight brown hair that came to the middle of her back, and a crazy familiar face, one a couldn't place. Nice hazel eyes that were set perfectly between her nose, and suddenly it came to me. "Olivia? Olivia Delgado?" I asked as she stared at me.

"Edward Masen, as I live and breathe, I thought that was you. Aren't you playing hockey in Pittsburgh, that's where you went when you left school isn't it?" she asked me causing me to nod.

"Yeah, but certain events have brought me to Hoboken." She gave me a look, but I didn't say anything. Bella and Logan spent so much of their time here, I couldn't make things awkward for them. "I just wanted some ice time, to clear my head."

"I can give you an hour before the five to seven triple A team comes on, after that we're full up for the night." I nodded taking the skates, stick, and pucks that she had sat out for me. She swiped my credit card and pointed me toward the entrance of the ice. As soon as my skates were tied on my feet I dumped the pucks on the ice. Suddenly I noticed nothing.

_Slap_, in when the puck, for the stupidity I had to think coming here would solve things. _Slap,_ for ever believing that I could trust Emmett. _Slap,_ for being an idiot and believe that Bella would ever believe me._ Slap_, for wanting to go back in time and never breaking up with Bella. _Slap, slap, slap_. One right after another they went into the goal, and before I knew it there were no pucks left. The stands were starting to fill with parents as they brought their kids to practice, other children, older brothers and sisters were watching me, they probably knew who I was, and wondered why I was shooting pucks at a community center in Hoboken New Jersey.

I skated over to the goal and started to pick up the pucks and put them back in to the bucket. I skated over to the bench to tie my shoes on, and suddenly collided with a woman as I stepped off the bench. "Sorry ma'am" I said as I looked down and realized I had collided with Esme Cullen. "Oh, hi Mrs. Cullen."

"Edward Masen, what are you doing here? Are you the reason Bella was in such a hurry to leave this morning?" she asked me as I looked at her. "You haven't seen her today have you?" I shook my head. "She came this morning and dropped Logan off, then left. We haven't been able to get a hold of her, and no one knows where she went."

Before I knew what was happening I blurted out, "I'm sorry about everything Mrs. Cullen. I never meant to hurt Bella, and I know that I did, and for that I'm such an idiot." Before she could say anything my phone started to ring, making me pull it from my pocket. "Would you excuse me for a minute" she nodded as I walked over to the side to answer my phone. "What's up Sid?"

"She was here."

"Excuse me?"

"She was here, she walked in to the locker room around four o'clock, and gave Emmett a piece of her mind. She slapped him and tried to beat his ass twice but I had to hold her back. She was here because she wanted to know the truth. Let me tell you she's distraught about the whole thing, and she doesn't know what to do." I ran my hand through my hair, she knew the truth, but what did this mean for me, for us? "She doesn't know if she wants to let you in, she's afraid that you're going to come back in the picture and leave when things get to be to much. She is on her way back to New Jersey now, and I told her to go and talk to you. I don't know if she will but I told her where you were staying."

"What did he say, was he scared of her. I don't know anymore, but I have to call you back later." I said not even letting him say something as I hung up and turned back to Esme.

"Someone important?" she asked, trying to see if I was seeing someone.

"No ma'am, or well, it was a team mate, Sidney Crosby. He called to tell me that Bella showed up at the training facility in Pittsburgh today. Apparently she gave Emmett a run for his money." I said as she looked at me. "I should explain, would you like to get something to eat and I'll explain things?" she nodded and we made our way to the concession stand to get something.

An hour later, after a lot of explaining Esme Cullen was staring at me awestruck. "You're telling me that you broke up with Bella because Emmett persuaded you to think she was getting in the way of your career and you needed to focus? Then you never knew that Bella had driven to Pittsburgh to give you that letter, and Emmett has had it the whole time? Then just a couple days ago you found out you were a father, to a five-year-old little boy? Does Bella know any of this?" she asked me and I shook my head.

"I came here yesterday afternoon, one of the girls at her shop told me she was here and I tried to tell her. I don't think she believed me though, at least not until she turned up in Pittsburgh this afternoon and demanded the truth from Emmett. Sidney said she slapped him across the face and tried to hit him a couple more times, but he stopped her."

She didn't say anything as we sat there for a couple more minutes, but she shook her head. I didn't know what she was thinking, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to know. Right now things were really screwed up, and I hope that since Esme now knew the truth she might try and convince Bella to speak with me. "Thank you Edward, for explain everything to me, but I need to get Logan from practice. You should try and find Bella, explain this to her, she really needs to know the truth." She stood up, as I did the same holding her chair out for her.

"Thank you for listening to me Esme" she just nodded and made her way toward the stairs where it looked like my son, who's name I had learnt was Logan, was waiting for her.

"It looks like things went well," Olivia said as she sat in the seat where Esme resided just a second before. "I didn't meant to eve's drop, but when the hell were you ever involved with Bella Swan?" she asked as I laughed.

"A year or so after I left school. I was twenty, we met in Pittsburgh in August of 2006. She was only seventeen and I knew she was young, but she meant everything to me."

"What happened?"

Did I want to tell her, I asked myself as I took a sip of my coffee, but I guess I sort of had to? "I let someone convince me that hockey was more important. That she would wait for me after I got everything together. I was an idiot for listening to him, I broke up with her after that, and I just found out he ruined my life, the one person I never thought would."

"You're talking about Emmett aren't you?" I nodded "that sounds nothing like the Emmett we grew up with." She said as I nodded.

"You wouldn't recognize him now, I don't recognize him. Over the last six years Emmett has kept so much from me, including the fact that Bella was pregnant and came to me." Shit, holy shit, I didn't want that to come out.

"Wait, you're telling me you're Logan Swan's father?" I just nodded as her eyes widened. "Emmett kept the fact that you were a father from you? Didn't Bella tell you?"

"In a letter, which she gave to Emmett to give to me."

"Jesus, what kind of hole did Emmett dig himself into? Bella Swan is a tough little cookie, let me tell you that never lets anyone get in her way; and if she doesn't like something she'll tell you. She's a good friend with my husband Jake; her dad was best friend with Jake's father. Jake played hockey for the Black Hawks as he turned twenty-one, but was injured that first season. He can't play contact anymore, so it ruined his career, but he came back here, and started to coach this team. I met him two years ago through a mutual friend, we married last July." I smiled. "Bella gives Jake a run for his money sometimes though, especially if he does something she doesn't like. Or when he is around Logan, he loves that kid like a son. You know he's the best little defensemen we've seen around here in ages."

I smiled. It was nice to hear Bella giving people a run for her money, like she used to. I had never seen her like that, but from stories that Alice and Rose used to tell me, she was like that until her parents died, and they missed that part of her. I was also happy to know that despite the fact that I played hockey and let it come between us, she didn't stop our son from playing the game. The thought of having a family, something that I had always wanted; a family that actually cared for me, and one that loved me, was perfect and I hoped she would allow this to happen. I loved Bella, I always had, and I hoped she knew that, if she didn't maybe once she realized it she would allow herself to become mine, for good.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five  
Bella Swan  
December 21, 2012**

As the days rolled on I thought more and more about what Sidney had said to me. My brain was in constant thought, whether I should let him in, whether I should just tell him to leave, whether I really wanted his presence around again. Well I knew I did, that was the thing; I had never really gotten over Edward, and now that he was back, well old feelings were starting to rekindle. So maybe I should do the right thing and let Edward in, after all, he had been telling the truth. Christmas was right around the corner, and I knew that Edward didn't have anyone to spend it with; considering he wasn't in Pittsburgh and I knew he never went home to Chicago.

Out front I could hear Angela and the other girls conversing with customers, using the Christmas spirit to their advantage, and I loved that my little café was doing so well. This season was doing me well, many people didn't want to wait in the long lines to get into Carlos Bakery, and since we weren't far from where they were located, people often came here, and really enjoyed themselves and the food. It was a touristy season, Hoboken was famous from The Cake Boss, NYC was maybe half hour away, and Newark was fifteen minutes up the road.

Due to the extra business, I was currently in the back with an apron on over my clothes, and my sleeve rolled up to my elbows making more pastries. I had pulled my hair in to a messy bun, and I knew that there had to be flour matted on my face, there usually was. Suddenly the door from the front opened and Juliet, one of our newer girls popped her head inside. "Bella, Esme is here for lunch, are you ready or do you want me to send her back?" she asked me before looking at my mess in front of me. "Send her back?"

"Yes, I need to get these cookies finished." Using the back of my hand I tried my best to wipe the flour off my face but I knew there was no point to that. Esme would just shrug off the fact that I was covered in flour, that or she would roll up her sleeves like mine and help me out. As Esme walked in the door I smiled, you would never be able to tell that the woman before you was forty-seven years old. You wouldn't guess that she had a twenty-two year old daughter either, she aged gracefully, and I couldn't hope but do the same, as I grew older.

"Bella, sweetheart, you need to stop working all the time. I swear you're going to have gray hairs before you turn twenty-five." She said as she kissed me on the opposite cheek the flour was on. I wiped my hands on my apron before giving up and grabbing a dish-towel, flour was simply impossible to remove. "So, are you ready to take a break and grab some food?"

"Can I just finish up these cookies? Christmas is this week, and everyone wants extra cookies, I swear I made extras but they're just flying off the shelf." I said as Angela entered the room.

"No not happening," she said removing the rolling pin from my hand. "Juliet and Regina are out front closing for lunch, we can take turns eating and making cookies while we're closed. Actually, take the rest of the day off, you need a break." She said as I looked at her pointedly, "Come back and pick Logan up from the shop at four, I don't want to see you until then." She said practically pushing me out of the kitchen making Esme chuckle.

Angela and I had met while we were both in Culinary School. I was eighteen, juggling a baby and school, but had an eye for the business side as well as the baking side. Angela had been a little older and my first friend, she had recently moved out of her house and was settling in to a new apartment. We became friends fast. When graduation came, I was drawing up plans for the café, and Angela was all over helping me. She was the best manager/friend a person could ask for, and it helped that the Cullen's and Rose, as well as Logan loved her. "Thank you" I said as she pushed me out the door. It was nice to get to spend a little extra time with Logan, even if it was only a few extra hours or minutes. She made sure that I got as much time with him as I could, and for that I was thankful.

Esme and I walked out of the café and to her car as I pulled my winter jacket on over my sweater. Before she said anything I knew we would be going to her favorite Italian Restaurant, La Bella Italia. We went there whenever we had lunch together, and I was pretty sure that the staff knew us by name now. As the waiter showed us to our table I caught side of Edward sitting alone, looking for someone, wait looking for me. "Esme, what the hell is this?"

"He wanted to talk to you Bella, and had no way of contacting you. I know that it's only been five or so days, and you may need more time to think about this, but he's only here for another week or so. You need to let him tell you everything, his side, not Emmett's, or Sidney's, or anyone else's, just his." She was right, I knew she was, but I didn't want to be alone with him. I still loved him, but I wanted to claw his eyes out.

"Just please, tell me you're staying for lunch?" I asked as she shook her head.

"This is something that you have to do on your own. Nobody else needs to be here with you, you're a strong young women you can do this; without Rose or Alice, without Carlisle or I, you can do it by yourself." I closed my eyes and gulped before taking a deep breath. I could do this, Esme said so; but why the hell was I so afraid to go and talk to him? I know that I need to hear everything from him. There were so many questions I had, so many things I wanted explained to me.

"Everything will be okay sweetheart, he doesn't want to hurt you. Quite the opposite really, he wants to tell you the truth. He just wants a chance, a chance that he never really got to have." It was that statement right there that I understood why he was here. Every chance that I thought I gave to him was taken away the moment I put that letter in Emmett's hands. No one ever asked him if he wanted to be a father to a five year old, no one gave him nine months to get used to the idea, it was thrown at him, he had no time to prepare for this.

I walked toward the table where Edward was sitting and he quickly got up to pull my chair out for me. Esme smiled and walked out of the restaurant; leaving me there to face the man I still loved. "I see some things haven't changed, Edward." I said as he pulled my chair out.

**Edward Masen  
December 21, 2012**

"I see some things haven't changed, Edward," she said as I pulled the chair out for her, her statement making me chuckle.

"Nope, still as humble as ever." I joked making her roll her eyes.

"I can see that."

I had the greatest urge to stick my tongue out at her, but I was supposed to be mature right now. I couldn't just jump back in to the way things were, I didn't even know if they were ever going to go back that way. "How have you been?" I asked her hoping for the truth.

She shrugged, then looked at me. "Hurt, confused, stressed, busy, trying to be a mom." she looked down for just a minute, "why did you leave? What did I do wrong?" she had tears in her eyes now, and it took me only a second to grab her hand and start shaking my head.

"No, it was never you Bella, it was me. And I know that's what everyone says, but it was me. I let someone convince me that our relationship was distracting me from doing my job, from doing the best I could. I was naïve, so naïve, and I never should have listened to him, he has ruined everything." I said as she looked up.

"Emmett?" I nodded. "Why has he done all of this? Manipulated you, humiliated me, taking a father away from Logan? That little boy is so good, and only bad things have happened to him." She said. "All he's ever wanted is a father, someone to play hockey with, someone to look up to, he hasn't had that." She said wiping a tear from her eye.

"I swear if I would have known Bella I would have been here in a heartbeat." I said as she nodded. "I would have left Pittsburgh to come take care of you."

"No!" she said just a little loud, making people look at us. "No, you love your job Edward! I would have never asked you to leave it for us. We could have made it work, I would make sure it would have worked." She said looking at me. "If you would have left you would have resented me, then you really would have left for good."

"No, I would never" I started to say as the waitress came over to take our orders.

"Hello, I'm Tanya and I'll be your server today, can I start you off with a couple of drinks?"

"A bottle of wine please, white preferably." I said looking at Bella to make sure that was okay.

"And are you ready to order, or would you like a few more minutes?"

"I'll have the chicken Florentine with a garden salad, ranch dressing on the side; and she'll have the mushroom ravioli with chicken Caesar salad." I said as Bella looked at me quizzically. Waitress Tanya walked away and I continued to look at Bella as she stared at me.

"You remember" is all she said making me nod.

"Bella, I would have never left you. Leaving the first time was my biggest mistake, but missing out on having a family. A family I always wanted, it would have never happened. I was a free agent back then, I could have played for the Devils; or once you turned eighteen if you wanted you could have come to Pittsburgh, we would have made it work."

"I have regrets too, I wished that I would have give you that letter. I wish that I wouldn't have given up when I didn't hear from you; that I kept calling, kept making trips to Pittsburgh. But I had Logan to think about, I couldn't hang on to a dream, especially because I thought you had gotten that letter." She said making me nod.

"I was an idiot for leaving you Bella. My entire life my escape was hockey, but I always wished for a family, a real family. My life growing up was shit, yes we had money, but I didn't have love, and I've always wanted my children to know I love them; from the moment I found out. You don't know how many times I've pictured the two of us together again. You always had a swollen belly, pregnant with my child, I would lean down an kiss you stomach, telling that precious baby how much I loved him or her, how much I loved their mommy. I should have found my way back to you years ago." I said as she looked at me with tears welling up in her eyes.

"I don't know what the reasoning behind Emmett's actions were, other than being purely shellfish. He was my best friend, and he knew that I would have taken care of you. I let him tell me that our relationship was getting in the way of my career, that in the long run if I wanted to be with you, I would have money to support us, and you would wait for me. That you would understand why I did what I did; I believed every single word he told me, and I was stupid to do so. Because of my actions, I lost everything, the women I loved, no love, and that chance at making a family with her, at having a family."

She looked down at the table as I said those words, I wasn't going to lie, I still loved her, I think I always will, and I wanted her to know that. She sniffled then looked at me again. "You know you're life, hockey, it changes everything. When I ran in to you with my shopping cart six years ago my life changed, then you leaving me it changed again. When I found out I was pregnant I had no doubt I was birthing a hockey prodigy" she laughed at that part. "Logan has changed my life in every single way, and I may have had him young, but I don't regret the way I have done things. I tried to be the best parent I could to make my parents proud, to make you proud, Carlisle and Esme. I can't blame you for leaving me Edward, you were doing what was best for your career, I just wish that I could have been there supporting you, that we could have been there."

"What was it like? Being pregnant and being a mother without having me around?" I asked quietly.

"At first it was scary, really scary. Then I was sad because I was alone, but eventually I got around to being happy. For the first couple months I really hated that you weren't around to share it with me, I had always thought that you wanted a family, even if we were to young. I realized that I need to be happy, to do the right thing, and the right thing was for me to take care Logan, I knew I would never be able to put him up for adoption. So I graduated high school with my class, walked across the stage big belly and all. I went into labor at the beginning of August, and made the decision to do it all natural. Hurt like a bitch, but I got through it, I got through everything despite how hard it was. Carlisle and Esme helped so much, more than I could ever thank them for. I started school five months later, in the spring semester, and got my degree in the culinary arts as well as business administration. This past May I opened the café, and the rest is history. It wasn't easy, being a mother and going to school, but I had the best support system, and it helped that I lived with Carlisle and Esme, and that Esme stayed home during the day. I didn't have to put Logan in daycare and I knew he was getting the proper care. The September after Logan's fourth birthday, I enrolled him in Pre-K, and we moved into a town house, we started our lives as a real family." She said and I thought I might cry.

"Do you, um, do you happen to have a picture of him, as a baby?" I asked choking up a little, as she nodded and took her wallet out of her bag.

Looking at the picture of a baby Logan with little tuffs of brown curly hair, and his bright green eyes made me smile. I may have not seen him as a baby, or toddler, or when he lost his first tooth. I wasn't there when he smiled, or rolled over, or started crying, his first Christmas, baptism, first hockey practice, hockey game. I may have missed all of those things, but he was young, and there were still so many firsts for me to see. I made the decision at that moment that no matter what happened, I was going to do my best to be a father, a good father, and some way, I was going to be there for all of his remaining firsts.

"He was maybe three months old when this picture was taken." She said as a tear fell down my cheek. He was laying in his crib in a pair of monkey pajamas, smiling up at the camera, just looking so happy. "He looked a lot like you as a baby, he still does." She said making me shake my head.

"No, he looks like you." I said as she laughed.

"Looks like me, sure, act like me, well that's a different story. That kid is you in every possible way. Wise for a five year old smart, polite, and the way he talks about hockey. It makes me forget that he is only five years old sometimes. He even wants to play NHL hockey when he is older, he's your son in every way." She said making me sit just a little taller.

"I want you to know that if I would have gotten that letter I would have been here."

"I know," she said.

"And I want to be here now. I want to be here for ever laugh, smile, tear, argument; I'm in it for good. I know there are some details we need to iron out, I know it won't be easy, but I want to be his father Bella." I said, as she looked at me tears falling down her cheeks.

"Those are the exact words I pictured you would say six years ago," she said as her voice broke. "I believe you, I just, wish we could have had this years ago. To know someone broke something that could have been so good." I took my finger and wiped away a tear, bringing her eyes up to mine. "Do you have anyone to spend Christmas with?" she asked quietly.

"No, I'm staying at the Hilton here in Hoboken for Christmas. I didn't know how things were going to pan out, so I have a room there until just after New Years." I said as she nodded. "I have to be back the third for the game against the Senators on the fourth. I was able to get two weeks off to try and figure things out here."

She took a deep breath, "How about you spend Christmas with us? Logan and I, well we have this tradition, and I'm sure he'd love to share it with you. Every Christmas Eve the two of us go into the city and go to Central Park to just walk around. Afterward, despite how it's always crowded, we go to Rockefeller Center and ice skate. Then Christmas morning we open presents at the house, and then get all dressed up to go to Carlisle and Esme's. We open presents and have a small brunch, then around six thirty we have a huge dinner that leaves you stuffed for days." Her big brown eyes looked up at me, she was so hopefully, and seemed so excited, that I just couldn't say no, not that I wanted to.

Through everything that has happened lately, this was the one thing I was grateful for. It was my chance to actually spend Christmas with my family, a while day of presents, and food, laughing and joking with friends and family. Most of all, it was my first Christmas with my son, and that was the greatest Christmas present of all.

"With those eyes, how could I say no." I smiled, for the first time I noticed how our hands had gravitated towards each other. "It will be perfect."

Having accidently let our food get cold we ordered another round, and this time actually ate our lunch. We talked, about Logan, his little quirks, his likes dislikes. I found out that despite him being Italian, on Bella's side, he hated pasta, minus Spaghetti-O's he loved Spaghetti-O's. That he loved batman, and his favorite hockey player (this month) was Anton Volchenkov. I also realized how much Bella had changed, how she had grown up, but there wasn't a single thing that I didn't love about her.

Just over an hour later we walked out of the restaurant hand-in-hand, still laughing and smiling. Since Bella's car was still at her café and she needed to pick Logan up from Angela's watchful eye, we made the decision to take the mile and a half walk back. Grabbing at her pockets for gloves she didn't notice the ice in front of her, and before you knew it she was falling. I grabbed for her, and unfortunately slipped as well, but at least she landed on me and not the cement. Me, well I was half in a snow bank, half on ice, but I saved her fall.

"Still a klutz I see" I joked causing her to stick her tongue out at me like the mature woman she was, and that was the old Bella.

"I distinctly remember a professional hockey player slipping as well, maybe you aren't as smooth as you like to think Mr. NHL." She joked as I started poking at her sides making her squeal.

"Aren't you going to help me up? Mr. NHL down here, with a soaking rump!" I joked as she stood up.

She thought for a minute with a playful smile and shook her head. "Nah, you look fine right down there. I think that rump of yours needs to be a little more moist." She turned around to walk away as I caught her hand. "Why Hello, is there something I can help you with?" she laugh as I gave a little tug and she came toppling to the snow bank with me. She let out that girlish giggle I loved to hear before we finally both stood up.

"And to answer your question," I said "take me and never leave me?" she looked away quickly, and I knew she wanted to say yes.

"If things were that easy, I would." I knew they weren't, we had Logan to think about, and I could tell we still loved each other, but we both needed to find that balance.

Suddenly my phone started to ring, and as I looked at the caller ID I scrunched my eyebrows. "Give me a minute?" she nodded as I answered. "Hey coach, what's up?"

"Edward, I'm so glad you answered. Is there somewhere we can meet up? I'm here in Newark, and I have an offer for you, well a couple of us have an offer for you. Nothing is set in stone, but this offer is something I don't think you can refuse." He said as I looked at Bella. The joy on her face made me smile, it made me want to laugh, and cry, and just be with her.

"Uh yeah, but I'm in Hoboken. Could you meet me at Eclipse Café here? I was just headed that way." I said ignoring what happened before the call and grabbing Bella's hand.

"Of course, I'll be there if fifteen or twenty minutes. See you then."

As I hung up the phone and Bella and I continued to walk I could see the curiosity in her eyes. "What was that about?"

"I'm not really sure, coach said that he had and offer I couldn't refuse." She said nothing more and ten minutes later the two of us walked in to the café where Rose, Alice, Esme, Angela, and a few other girls were waiting. Logan was off behind the counter choosing a cookie from the bunch and everyone eyes were focused with our intertwined hands.

"Edward, whatever happens, just make sure you think about this offer before you answer. You have to think about Logan now too." She said as I nodded, the ringing of the door sounding and coach walking inside. Bella nodded and kissed my cheek before walking over to the girls and pulling a now cookie filled Logan on to her lap.

"Ah. Mr. Masen, now about that offer." I noticed another man following closely behind coach. I had seen him somewhere before, but now that I thought about it I couldn't remember his name. All I knew was that decision was going to be very big, and leave me with a decision I didn't want to make.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six  
Edward Masen  
December 21, 2013**

"How does that sound Edward?" Lou Lamoriello asked me as I sat there in a stunned silence. If things went right I would have an opportunity for a transfer, not a trade to the New Jersey Devils. It would be a chance to be closer to Bella, to Logan, a chance for us to be a family; and I wanted all of those things, but I didn't want to leave my team behind. Running my hand through my hair I listened as he continued on, "Hoboken is just eleven miles from Newark, and it gives you the chance to be closer to his family." I just nodded, I wanted to be with my family, but did I want this?

I leaned my head back against the couch, closing my eyes I felt the couch shift next to me. Coach and Lamoriello had gotten up and were shaking hands, I got up and went to do the same, and as Lamoriello walked out of the café I looked to coach. "I want to be with my family, but I don't want to leave the team. Bella and I, we need to discuss this." I said as he nodded.

"We're not trying to get rid of you Edward, we're just trying to make everything easier on you."

"I know, I just, I don't think I really realized that we were going to have to work something out. I guess since we hadn't figured anything out until today we were going to talk about it later." I said

"Nothing is set in stone yet Edward, remember that." He said walking out the door and allowing me to sit back down and once again run my hands through my hair. I noticed Bella sit down next to me and I turned to look at her.

"You knew who that was, didn't you?"

"Of course, I've been following that team for as long as I can remember." She said with a smile, and I knew that she had a clue of what happened, and it was what she wanted to happen.

"Dan Bylsma went to Lou Lamoriello, and he told him what happened. The letter, Emmett, me not knowing, and coming here; how they gave me time off so I could come here and find you, try and explain everything, make it better. Sidney had to have said something to him; he knows that I want to be with you and Logan. So Bylsma went to Lamoriello with a proposition, and due to my situation they're in talks of transferring me to the Devils. Nothing is set in stone, and I would have to say yes before anything happened, but if everything went through it's a possibility that I would be in Newark instead of Pittsburgh." I said as she looked up at me with teary eyes.

It was in that moment that I knew she expected me to drop everything and come to Newark, to be with them. "What did you tell them?" she asked quietly though I could hear the hope in her voice.

"I wanted to discuss this with you first. It affects more than just me now, it's our life, and I have to do what is right for everyone." How could I tell her that I loved her and Logan despite barely knowing them, but I didn't want to leave Pittsburgh? "Bella, are you okay?"

"You do want to leave, am I right?" she asked me as I looked down at the floor. "I understand you know. This is all happening so fast, I mean twelve hours ago we weren't talking to each other. I don't know what to do Edward, I'm happy that you have this opportunity, and things might be working out, but I can't ask you to leave everything behind." She said as I nodded.

"I don't want to walk away from you two Bella, but I love my team despite everything that has happened. Sidney has been a huge part of all of this, helping me get here, getting you to talk to me, but I can't just leave me team behind. You and Logan are my number one concern, but I love my job."

Bella didn't say anything, and I hadn't noticed that except for her and a couple of the workers, we were the only ones here. She turned around and her eyes connected with Logan's, I hadn't seen him hiding behind Angela. "I think before either of us decided anything, we need to tell Logan. We need to know how he is going to react to everything." I nodded, here I was pretty much with my mind made up and we hadn't even told our son I was his father; pretty messed up, right?

All I could think about was what if he hated me? If Logan hated everything about me, what would we do? What would I do?

**Bella Swan  
Later that night**

As I got Logan ready for bed that night I couldn't help but think about how I was going to tell him about Edward. There were so many possibilities that I had thought about, and I didn't know the answer. I didn't know what was going to happen tomorrow, or next week, or next month, those were things that I couldn't determine. Edward and I hadn't really discussed what we were going to say to Logan; I wanted to tell Logan before Christmas, but that was only days away.

I didn't exactly regret inviting Edward to Central Park with Logan and me for our Christmas Eve tradition, and I didn't regret inviting him to Carlisle and Esme's for Christmas, but maybe things should be set in stone before all of that happens. In the last couple days Edward had proven to me that he wanted to be part of our lives, and I appreciated that, I appreciated that he really wanted to be part of Logan's life. "Mom" Logan said pulling me out of a trance as he pulled Buzz Lightyear pajamas on.

"Yeah, Buddy?"

"Can Alex and Josh spend the night tomorrow?" he asked as I let out a breath. For a minute I thought he was going to ask about Edward again. He hadn't said anything on the way home, which surprised me because I knew he recognized him in the café. It wasn't that I was relieved he didn't ask, but okay I sort of was. I didn't want to stumble over explaining this tonight, so yes I was relieved.

"Yeah, I'll call Ryan and Mrs. Nolan in the morning." I said tucking him in to the bottom bunk of his bed.

"Mom" he said again as I looked at him with my eyebrows raised. "I know I asked you a couple days ago about my dad, but is that really the reason he isn't around?"

I didn't say anything for a minute, and then shrugged. "Until a couple days ago, yes, it was. Someone led me to believe that, but I now know different." I knew he wanted more information, and I already knew what he was going to ask. "I know what you're going to ask me," I laughed tickling him just a little, causing him to squeal. "Yes, in the last couple days I've been in contact with him."

"Who is he?" he asked me, making me look down at the floor.

"Logy, that is something I would love to tell you, but unfortunately I promised your father that that was something we would do together." He looked at me with a smile on his face. "Within in the next few days you will find out, but for now I think you spending a day with your friends is just what you need." I said hoping he would forget about everything as I handed him his teddy-bear.

"Mom" he said one last time as I got up to turn the light off. "One last question," he paused for a minute. "Do you think he loves me?" this caused me to sit back down and push his hair out of his face.

"I know he does. He loves you more than anything, and we're trying to work everything out for you. He loves the both of us."

"Then why wasn't he here when I was a baby? What made things different then? Didn't he love you?" he continued to ask questions.

"Hey silly goose you said one question, that was more than one." I laughed kissing him on the cheek. "I think that's enough questions for now. Now it's time for bed, and when you wake up tomorrow, maybe I'll answer those questions for you." Kissing him again I switched the lights off and shut the door behind me.

Walking into the living room downstairs I grabbed my cell phone off the coffee table and started to scroll through my contacts. Stopping at Edward's number I closed my eyes, I really hoped that soon, everything would just fall in to place.

When I first had Logan I hoped that one-day, Edward would come back to me. That he would realize he was missing so much, something that was so beautiful, and he would come home. I never thought about how bitter I really was about everything, but every time I saw him everything came back to me, every word he told me, every broken promise, and how much he didn't want me, didn't want us. Now here I was, learning that everything was a lie; how did I cope with something like this? Taking a deep breath I plopped on the couch, before hitting the button to call Edward.

_Ring, Ring, Ring_. Every time that stupid ring went again it seem as if it was mocking me, I'm not going to answer, you can't get a hold of me, te-he-ha-ha, I hated it.

"Hello, Bella? Are you there?" a breathless Edward answered. "Bella, Bella is that you?"

"Yeah, yes, sorry Edward, um, why are you out of breath?" I asked causing him to laugh.

"I was just getting out of the shower when I heard my phone ring. I kind of ran out of the bathroom hoping it was you." I rolled my eyes and pushed myself up so I wasn't slouching. "So what's up, why'd you call?" he asked me as I paused, why did I call?

"I don't know," I said truthfully with a little giggle.

"You don't know?" he asked laughing, "Did I get that right?"

"Yeah" I groaned running a hand through my hair. "Logan asked about you again tonight" I said as the two of us sat there in silence for a moment. "I mean, it's not a bad thing, but it made me think about when we were going to tell him. I want to tell him before Christmas, or even before Christmas Eve. I know that it's only a short ways away, but I want to tell him soon; I can't keep making up excuses, I feel so bad." I said.

"What about tomorrow?" he asked me as I bit my lip. Well I guess there was no time for stalling.

"I kind of promised Logan that he could have some friends spend the night. But if we take him out to lunch we could tell him then, then he can decided if he still wants his friends to come over." I said as Edward stayed silent.

"Do you think it's wise to tell him something like this when he has the possibility of friends coming over later? We could wait till the day after tomorrow, have a late lunch then tell him then. It would give him a little time to think about everything before Christmas Eve, and before I show up for Christmas." He said as I went 'o crap' in my head.

I bit my lip hoping he didn't catch on, because I had forgotten to mention it to Esme when we were waiting for Edward to finish talking. "Bella, you did tell them, didn't you?" shit, he caught on.

"It may have slipped my mind with everything that had happened earlier today. Us talking, the offer, I forgot to tell Esme and let her know. But I promise the moment I get off the phone with you I'll call her." I said making me realize how frustrating this must be for him. "Edward, they aren't going to say no, you're as much as a part of the family now as anyone else." I said as he groaned.

"I know to them it won't matter, but it does to me Bella. I want to feel as if I'm excepted by all of them, not the miss fit father." He said making me look at the floor. "I wish that we could spend Christmas together, just the three of us, as a little family, but right now I don't think it would be smart, Logan doesn't even know who I am yet. All I want is to be with the two of you, and I know that I said I don't want to leave the team, and I'm not doing it so I don't have to be around you, it's just that they've been there through everything." He said and before I could open my mouth he continued on. "But if what you want is for me to come there to be with you two, then so be I'll, I'll be there in a heart beat." He said making me gasp, I couldn't ask him to do that.

"Edward, I can't ask you to leave your team. So maybe until we figure things out we'll have to commute back and forth from Pittsburgh and Hoboken, you're not the only one who can move. So that is something else to be considered." I said, as much as I didn't want to leave my family behind, or the shop, I knew that one of us had to give, we couldn't live in two places if we wanted to try and make things work.

"You have family there Bella, friends, and so does Logan. You would be giving up so much more, and it's not like by going to Newark I would have to stop playing hockey, I would still be playing, just with a different team." He said causing me to mentally shrug before we hung up the phone a second later.

The next day came and went to fast for my liking, and with Logan, Alex, and Josh running around the house I had no time for a little piece and quiet. Most of the thinking I did came later that night after the boys had gone to bed, and while I lay awake thinking about what would happen the next day. Edward and I made plans to meet at La Bella Italia again for lunch, it ensured that a freak out wouldn't happen when we told Logan the news, but I couldn't help but think about how it may be safer for us to here, in the comfort of our own home.

Another problem was that I still had no idea what to say to Logan, I knew I had explained a little, told him that things were different than I originally thought, but how would he take the actual news? The ploy was that we were going to meet Esme for lunch, but maybe telling him that he was meeting a friend of mine, or that he was coming here would be different, and work better.

By ten o'clock the next morning I had called Edward and changed our plans, he was now going to arrive at the house at one for a late lunch, and we would tell Logan here. Alex and Josh had both been picked up, and now I was walking around picking up just a little before going to get ready. Logan was downstairs watching some cartoons as I showered, and I knew that the picking up I had done would be shot to hell seeing as Logan gets board really easily.

Just as I had finished pulling my pants up Logan stormed into my room and flopped on my bed. "I'm bored" he whined causing me to laugh and walk into my bathroom to put some make up on. "So who is this person I'm meeting?" he asked me flipping on to his stomach and resting his chin on his palms. "Is it your boooooyfriend?" he drawled out, making me think of Alice.

"No, he's not my boyfriend" I said looking out of the bathroom, "he's just a friend, and I want you to meet him." I said hoping he would leave it at that. "You might want go get dressed, I'm sure you don't want to meet him in your SpongeBob pajamas." I laugh as he looked down and rolled his eyes. Sliding out of my bed he slowly moved in to his room, grumbling the whole way.

Twenty minutes later I was hopping in to Logan's room trying to tie my shoe and get my son, realizing that this would only end in disaster. "Logan, what you doing?" I asked knocking on the door before opening. As I opened the door I realized that there were toys everywhere. "What happened in here?" I asked laughing, realizing that Logan was still in his pajamas.

"Alright, please, please, please get dressed." I said as I started picking up some of the toys. Thankfully Logan didn't put up a fight and got dressed in jeans and a long sleeve shirt just as the doorbell rang.

Gulping I stood there for a minute as Logan stared at me. "Are you gunna stand there looking all jumpy or are you gunna get the door?" he asked me as I playfully narrowed my eyes at him.

"Are you sure you're only five?" I asked him as he giggled "Sometimes I swear you're older" I laughed picking him up and carrying him down the stairs as he continued to giggle. Setting him down at the bottom of the stairs he ran into the living room as I went to get the door. Opening the door Edward seemed really nervous, more nervous than I was, which I could understand, this was going to be difficult for the both of us. "Hey" I said opening the door so he could step inside.

"Hey, how are you?" he asked breathlessly as he pulled flowers out from behind his back for me. "I wanted to bring something, I just didn't know what, so I thought maybe a little bit of spring would help." He said nervously as Logan popped his head out of the living room.

"So I am meeting your boyfriend!" he said with a toothless smile.

"No"

"Well Alex said that Ryan always brings his girlfriend flowers when he see's her!" he said as I looked at him and rolled my eyes.

"Wait, Ryan has a girlfriend?" I asked as the kid giggled and darted back in to the living room. It was a minute before Logan came running back as he realized who this so called 'boyfriend' (not really) was.

"WOAH" he said as I picked him up. "You're Edward Masen! You're dating a professional hockey player!" he said looking at me causing me to once again roll my eyes.

"Last time silly, he's not my boyfriend, just a friend." Logan rolled his eyes like I had then looked back at Edward.

"If you're not my mom's boyfriend who are you?" Edward stalled for a minute causing me to jump in; I didn't want to tell him right off the bat. Before I could even say anything Logan looked at me and rolled his eyes, "right a friend" I nodded as he gave me the 'I know you're lying' glare.

"It's nice to meet you Logan, I've heard a lot about you." Edward said shaking his hand as Logan smiled.

"I know who are you, and you're a really good hockey player, but you play for the wrong team." Logan said causing me to laugh at him and the look on Edward's face.

"Really now?" Edward asked him.

"Yupp! The Devils are the bestest team ever, they have Volchenkov!" I mouthed that it was his favorite player as Edward nodded.

"It's good that you think that, because if things go as planned I should start playing for the Devils in the middle of January." He said as Logan's face lit up and a huge smile spread across it.

"Logan why don't you and Edward go talk while I start lunch?" I asked him as he nodded.

It was nice to get a little quiet while I cooked, having Edward around to distract Logan was actually relieving. For once I didn't have to worry about Logan and burning food, I had someone who could watch him for me. And what Edward said, that he would play for the Devils if everything worked out, did he really want to be with us that much? I knew that we both had to give up a lot if we wanted this work, but I didn't want Edward to make that decision because he thought I didn't want to give my shop up. There was so much at stake, but Angela knew how to run the shop, and Esme would help, I could open another franchise in Pittsburgh, there were so many things that we had to think about. Logan had friends here, but he was still young he could make new ones. I hate to pull him away from Alex and Josh, but Pittsburgh wasn't that far, we could come back often, I would make sure they could talk over the phone, I would make sure everything worked out.

I closed my eyes, before realizing that I had been cooking and thinking for more than an hour. "Uh guys, lunch is ready." I called out as Edward walked in the room with Logan thrown over his shoulder. Right now, we really looked like a family.

**Edward Masen  
December 23, 2012**

When I got the call from Bella this morning for some reason I thought that maybe she wanted to back out of the whole thing. But no, thankfully she just wanted to do the lunch at her house rather than some restaurant. I was so nervous to tell Logan, what if he didn't want me around? What if he hated me? And I'm sure all of those emotions showed up on my face the moment Bella opened the door.

It was so easy to be happy around them, Bella loved Logan so much, and with out even knowing him I knew I loved him too. My first impression of him was funny, one, he thought I was Bella's boyfriend (sometime I hoped I would soon be), two he harassed me about not being part of the Devils. As Bella went to make lunch I got to spend some quality time with Logan. He was funny and full on energy; he loved everything to do about hockey, and the two of us even got into an indoor hockey game in the living room with the coffee table and end couch as the two goals. I wasn't sure how Bella would feel about us destroying the living room for a little fun, but I was willing to live with the consequences.

Almost an hour after Bella had gone into the kitchen she called us for lunch. Logan made a b-line for the dining room but out of nowhere I scooped him up and threw him over my shoulder. All the way to Bella's kitchen/dining room Logan giggled, and I couldn't help but feel like an actual family.

Bella had made beef stir-fry for lunch and as the three of us sat there and talked I knew that I had found my home. I didn't regret telling Logan that if things went through I would move to New Jersey, I just hoped that they would. Lamoriello made it seem as if it would, but I knew that nothing was set in stone.

"Can someone tell me the real reason why Edward is here?" Logan asked putting his fork down and crossing his arms. Are we sure he's only five?

Bella looked at me, I guess this was as good of a time as any. "I guess, that's something we can do." Bella said as I sat back in my chair. "Edward isn't just here so he can meet you, yes that was part of it, but we both have something important to tell you. It's something that you've wanted for a while, so I hope you're happy about it." Bella paused for a second as Logan looked between the two of us confused.

"You know how for the last couple weeks you've been asking me a lot about your father and why he isn't around?" Bella asked as Logan nodded. "Well I can finally tell you the truth now." She said as he looked at me.

"You're my dad aren't you?" he asked quietly as I nodded.

"Yes Logan, I'm your dad." And for that moment the entire room was silent.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven  
Bella Swan  
December 23, 2012**

I looked back and fourth between Edward and Logan. Logan's eyes were focused on Edward, neither of them said anything, and I could see tears in Logan's eyes. I had no clue if those were happy tears or sad tears, confused, excited, right now Logan was a closed book to me. "Logan, honey please say something." I said as he wiped a tear away. Logan was usually a pretty level headed for a five year old, but at this point I'm not sure if he really understood what was happening.

"What?" he asked looking between the two of us. "Why did you leave, what did I do, why did you want me?" Logan cried as Edward looked at him almost completely devastated.

"Logan you did absolutely nothing wrong, nothing what so ever." I said wiping away a tear of my own now. "I know I told you that he was gone long before you were born, and yes that is true; but I never said that he didn't want to be here. Originally yes, I thought that was the case, but someone very cruel kept your father from being with us. That man thought that your father's career was more important than his happiness, he never knew about you Logan, and I thought he did. Logan if that man had made different decisions, if he had done the right thing then he would have been her all along; you would have had a father like Alex and Josh, and you wouldn't be sad right now." I wiped away one of his tears and wrapped him in a huge. "I don't want you to change how you feel about him just because you found out something new. I want you to continue talking to him like you were before, like nothing happened. Edward is your father Logan, and from now on he is going to be around, he loves you very much." I said as he cried in my arms.

I knew my son better than any other person on this planet, and as he started to calm down I knew that he maybe understood, just a little bit, everything that I had said. As we waited for Logan to clam down I looked at Edward, he looked devastated, almost as if Logan wasn't going to accept him. I knew my son, he would except Edward, he always wanted a father, and though everything here may be a little screwed up, once it all worked out he would be happy he was here.

"Is that why you are going to play for the Devils now?" he asked Edward "So you can be with me and mom?" Edward nodded, right now it look as if he was at a loss for words. I knew both he and Logan were confused, I mean, who wouldn't be, but it would all work its self out. "Okay" Logan said making Edward and I look at him. "I guess I can give him a chance." Logan crawled in to Edward's arms making Edward smile.

I was so happy that Logan excepted Edward, that though there was some tears and questions it wasn't a big production. After lunch the three of us went into the living room, which I learnt had been turned into an indoor hockey rink, and finished Logan and Edward's game. At five o'clock Logan asked if we could turn the Devils vs. Lightening game on and I conceded, he was to be in bed by 8:30 the latest.

That night it was as if we had transformed in to a perfect little family. I was curled up in Edward's arms, and Logan was in between us wrapped in a little blanket. By the beginning of the third period Logan was sound asleep, he stayed between us till the end of the game, and it was then, when Edward carried him up the stairs, that I wished for nothing to change. As Edward tucked Logan in to his bed I went in to my room to change into my pajamas. I didn't know if Edward was going to stay here tonight, or if he would return to his hotel room, but some part of me wanted him to stay with us.

"Hey" Edward said as he lightly rapped on my bedroom door.

"Hey" I breathed as he came into the room farther.

"Thank you, for everything" he said as I smiled at him, trying to unhook my necklace. "Here, let me get that for you." Coming up behind me Edward's hands went to my neck, playing with the clasp as I pulled my hair away.

As the necklace fell from around my neck I turned around to look at Edward, "you don't have to go" I said quietly "if you want to stay tonight, you can."

He didn't say anything, just nodded, and I knew that everything between us would work out.

**Edward Masen  
December 23, 2012**

As I carried Logan up the stairs I allowed myself to think about everything that had happened through out the day. I was so overwhelmed, but so happy, so very happy. I had finally gotten my family, my son, his beautiful mother, and there was nothing else that could make me happy right now. Being with Bella and Logan was better than I could ever imagine, it was like we had automatically had melted into a family, as screwed up as our situation was, it didn't really matter at that moment.

I knew we still had a lot of explaining to do. Logan would ask questions in the future, his entire life, and as he got older he would understand better, but the fact that I wasn't there in the beginning would always stick with him. But here I was, carrying my son up the stairs, and tucking him in just like any normal father would do, and I was so happy.

As I went to walk down the stairs to go back to Bella I noticed an orange glow coming from the room at the end of the hall. The door was slightly cracked and I gave a light knock as I popped my head inside. There in the middle of the room was Bella, in a white silk tank top and matching shorts, getting more comfortable for the night. "Hey" I said quietly as she turned around.

"Hey" it was no louder that a breath, and at that moment all I wanted was to crossed the room and ravish her, but I didn't.

"Thank you, for everything." I said as she started to struggle with her necklace, one that I had given to her years before. "Here, let me get that for you." My hands went to the lobster clasp at the back of her neck, as Bella's shot around to pull her hair out of the way, quickly making contact with mine. She was breathing heavily, as if she was nervous, and I couldn't help but want to kiss this woman.

"You don't have to go" she said quietly "if you want to stay tonight, you can." At that moment I was relieved, since the moment we had told Logan I was his father I had wanted to stay right here, never leave them again. I wanted to be in the place I should have been when she was pregnant, when he was a baby; I never wanted to leave the two of them again.

We stood there for just a moment, looking in to each other's eyes, not saying anything. Looking in to her eyes I felt as if I was invincible, that together the two of us could conquer anything, and I just hoped that she would have me. I sat down on the edge of Bella's bed as she stood in front of me. Without her make up, or her hair all done, she reminded me of the old Bella. Still so youthful and pretty, but she was grown up now, and I couldn't believe that I had lasted six years without her; she was twenty-three now, I was nearly twenty-seven, and I didn't feel like the old Edward.

I wasn't the young hockey player who chased tail because I could, I wasn't the boy who fell head-over-heels in love with a girl the first time they ran into each other at the grocery store; we weren't the same people we had been six years ago. I felt as if I no longer fit the stereo type of a hockey player, but at the same time I wasn't sure if I had ever fit the stereo type of a hockey player.

Bella leaned in and wrapped her arms around my torso, "do you ever think about what would have happened had we stayed together?" she asked quietly. "I think about it all the time, and lately I don't know what to think."

"Bella, I think about it all the time. My biggest regret is leaving you, because of that I missed out on the beginning years of Logan's life, I missed out on loving you, being with you; it's the biggest regret in my life. But I can't live in the past, neither of us can, we have Logan to take care of, and if you'll have me I want to take care of you. I love you, I always have loved you, and right now whether you want to be with me or not I'm in this for our son. I will always be around because of him, I just hope you'll have me."

It was in that moment that Bella leaned in and connected her lips with mine. I don't know if that meant yes she would be mine, that she was my girlfriend, or what not, but I was hoping to was a yes. For a while the two of us just sat there kissing, at some point she had move and was straddling me, and before I knew it clothes were being removed, and the obvious sexual tension was being set free. I just hoped that we weren't moving too fast.

**Edward Masen  
December 24, 2012**

The next morning I opened my eyes to the unfamiliar room that was Bella's. I hadn't taken everything in last night, but I was impressed by what surrounded me. She had just a wall of windows that led to a little balcony that looked out over the backyard, a four-poster bed, a lounge chair, and a dark brown dresser. Next to that was a door that led to her bathroom, and another closed door ,which I assumed led to her closet. What really got me was her bed, it was so comfortable, more than the one I had back at my apartment in Pittsburgh, and a hell of a lot more comfortable than the one at the hotel.

Rubbing my eyes I realized that my clothes were folded on the lounge chair by the window, making me what had happened last night. Making love with Bella was better than I remembered, and it made me question if she had been with other people in the years we had been apart. I hadn't exactly been celibate, I mean I wasn't a man-whore, but I did have my fair share of women. I didn't expect Bella to wait for me, she was a grown women, and I was sure that she had needs.

Climbing out of bed I pulled on my clothes before slipping downstairs to where Bella was making breakfast. Logan was sitting at the island with a little chefs hat on assisting Bella, and I couldn't help but laugh at them. "Dad!" Logan called "You ready for today? Mom said you're coming with us!" he asked as I nodded giving him a kiss on the cheek.

"Morning" Bella said as I leaned across the island to give her a kiss, it was like we were finally a real family.

"Ewww, you girls have cooties!" Logan said as Bella and I laughed at him.

"You know buddy one day you're going to grow up and like kissing girls." Rather than saying anything Logan scrunched up his face and ran from the kitchen likely to go watch cartoons. This being the case I walked around to Bella, wrapping my arms around her waste, placing butterfly kisses on her neck.

"You know, if you keep distracting me like that, our food is going to be burnt." She said quietly making me chuckle. Releasing my arms and giving her one last kiss I took Logan's spot at the island and continued to make conversation with her as she finished up breakfast.

As Bella called Logan in for breakfast I smiled, we were a family now, a real honest to goodness family, and later today I would get to show so many people the truth. I knew Bella and Logan were excited to go to Central Park and Rockefeller Center and honestly I was too. We were going to have a fun day, and then tomorrow was Christmas, what more could I ask for?

"Alright, I'm going to run back to the hotel and shower and change, I'll meet you back here in an hour." I said kissing both of them on the cheek as bull followed me out in to the hall.

"Take my car, you'll get there and back faster." Nodding a gave her another kiss and ran out the door, "Edward" she called out the door "for the record, I love you too." I smiled, last night I had told her I loved her, and now she was saying it back to me. I ran to the car faster than before, now I just wanted to get back to my family as quick as I possibly could.

I pulled up to my hotel just a few minutes later, and as I opened the door to my room I wasn't expecting the person who was sitting before me. "Sidney?"

"About damn time you showed up Masen, I've been here since last night. I thought that maybe you would want a little company on Christmas, because last I heard things weren't going so well." I nodded as I rummaged through the drawers for some clean clothes. "Where the hell have you been?"

"At Bella's, I stayed with her and Logan last night." Raising an eyebrow at me I rolled my eyes. "I saw Esme, you remember who she is right?" he nodded "Well I ran in to her a couple days ago, and explained to her what happened. She sat there and listened, and actually helped me to talk to Bella. Or, well more so she told Bella they were going to lunch, when Bella was actually having lunch with me. It was there that I told her everything that happened, and we talked, and have been talking, and made the decision to tell Logan I was his father. We told his yesterday afternoon, and I've been with them sense. I'm spending today with them, and tomorrow I'm going to the Cullen's for Christmas, I'm spending Christmas with my family." I said with a huge smile on my face. "I'm sure they wouldn't mind if you came with me."

Shaking his head he stood up. "No, this is your time with your family. I'm sure my mother would be delighted if I told her that I was coming home, or even showed up as a surprise." He gave me a man hug (I have no idea what else to call it) before looking at me. "Coach said that if everything works out you'd be moving to Jersey, playing for the Devils?" I nodded. "Emmett looked pretty much heartbroken that you weren't coming back, but I honestly think that's because everyone hates him now. He doesn't talk much these days, it makes me think that he maybe actually feels bad about what he did."

I shrugged, I don't know if I care or not at the moment. "Emmett and I, well we've been best friends since we were kids. But I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust him, or look at him again. He almost ruined my entire life, I was lucky that Bella went to Pittsburgh to confront him, I'm not sure if she would have talked to me if that wouldn't have happened."

"I know, and dude trust me I'm not asking you to forgive him, I just wanted to tell you. Have a great Christmas, I have to try and get a flight to Nova Scotia on Christmas, oh they joy."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight  
Bella Swan  
December 24, 2012**

As Edward left to go back to the hotel I couldn't help but smile. So maybe what was happening between us was going a little quicker than I imagined, but I had never stopped loving Edward and he had never stopped loving me. In my eyes we were getting back together, not dating for the first time. I loved the fact that the three of us were going to be a family, like we were supposed to be. Today we would share this tradition with Edward, I was excited about that, no one would know what was going on between us, we would be a normal family.

After all this time, thinking that Edward had left us behind, that he didn't care, that his life was more important than his family; it was a nice change, actually knowing the truth. I knew a lot of what happened, happened because Edward and I were far to naïve at the time he left; we had to think beyond what happened and who administered it, it wasn't just Emmett. One of us could have made the decision to go see one another years before this, I could have tried again after leaving that letter, there were so many things I could have done, that he could have done, but neither of us made that jump. Don't get me wrong, I did blame Emmett for some part of this, he had been the one to fuel Edward's decisions to leaving, and he had hidden the letter from Edward. Emmett had taken everything away from Logan, from Edward, from me, and I hated him for that.

From the moment I thought Edward wasn't going to be around I had always made sure that there were people around who would be good father figures to him. Carlisle was amazing, not only did he play the part of doting grandfather, but also he was always around for Logan's firsts, something I wished Edward could have been around for. Then when Logan started playing hockey Jake took on a small role too, he wasn't able to play professionally anymore, and since we grew up together he started helping Logan learn the right ways, new tricks, he wanted him to be good; and when Logan meet Alex in pre-school, they quickly became best friends and Ryan was around. Ryan knew what it was like to be a single parent, he was a good dad, and had been through a lot, but he took care of Alex, and when Logan was around them, he took care of Logan too.

I owed a lot of people a lot of things, especially Carlisle and Esme. They had been there for me for so much; when my parents died I surely would have went into the system if it weren't for them. Both sets of grandparents were dead, and my parents were only children, there were no family members to take care of me. The Cullen's had made sure that I had a family, and that I had everything I ever wanted, they were the best people I have known.

With the people I had, I tried my best to give Logan the best life I could possibly give him. I was young, a teenager, and still had to finish high school, go to college, make sure we had a roof over our head. I didn't know what I was going to do if Carlisle and Esme kicked me out, but at the same time, I don't think I believed that that was something they would ever do. As time went on and I realized that I could actually be a suitable parents things got easier, well until Logan wanted to start hockey. For so long I battled with myself over if I should let him do it or not; but in the end I had to say yes. Whether Logan knew it or not (which he obviously didn't), him playing hockey was giving him a part of his father. I was naïve at the time to think that at some time, I knew that Edward had wanted to be with us, but there was something, someone, keeping him from us. A force, whether it was logical, or naïve, that was controlling every aspect of his life. True enough that force happened to be Emmett, and though ultimately breaking up with me was Edward's decision it was almost as if Emmett was a puppeteer, pulling the strings.

As I got ready I smile at the thought of our plans today. It was no longer about carrying on a tradition between mother and son, it was about bringing our family together, our first outing as a family. A part of me wanted to believe that Edward never wanted to leave me, but at the same time, he made the final decision to leave. It wasn't because he was manipulated, or forced, or anything like that, but somewhere, in his mind, he thought he was doing the right thing for himself, for us. Knowing all of this didn't stop me from asking myself what could have our lives been like if he had stayed? If we had been a family since the beginning; would we be married? Have another baby on the way? But these were questions I would never get answers too, and did I even want those answers?

I walked slowly into my bedroom as I looked around the room. Nothing was any different than it would usually be, except it was now the room where Edward and I had sex. It had been so long since I had been with someone in that way, and I felt like such a giddy schoolgirl because of it. I was quite obviously basking in the glory of the so-called, dirty-deed, but I didn't care. In the few times I had been with Edward we had never as you simply say it, fucked; Edward was the best lover a person could have. Taking his time, driving you crazy with his touches, his kisses, we made love, we didn't fuck, and it was perfect, he was perfect, or well as perfect as I thought a person could be. Edward alone was a man who was kind and compassionate, someone who didn't want you to be uncomfortable around him, and that was something I definitely wasn't, and something my, no our son wasn't either.

Calling Logan our son, just made me smile from ear to ear. For the last six years Logan had been my son, just my son, and now, I got to share him with his father, a dream I have had from the beginning. Almost directly after Edward left Logan ran upstairs to shower and get dress so we could leave as soon as Edward returned. I had done the same, except I spent longer in the shower, dreaming about the night before. Here I was pulling on the first clothes my hands touched, still dreaming about what had happened. A pair of dark jeans, and two crème long sleeve shirts was pulled on as well as two pairs of socks. My rarely used hockey skates followed as I grabbed my belt and hat and gloves as I went downstairs where I could hear Logan playing hockey in the living room.

"You better have shut the TV cabinet." I called as I walked down the stairs. The playing stopped for a minute as I heard the cabinet close.

"It's shut" he called back making me laugh.

"Thank you!" I said as I rounded the corner.

"Where is dad? I want to go now mom, I don't want to wait." He whined making me laugh.

"I'm sure he'll be here any minute bud. He's probably driving down the road right this moment." I said as Logan took a quick peek at the blinds as I walked in to the kitchen to get a glass of water. It was that moment that Logan yelled something else and the doorbell rang. "Logan Charles Masen, don't you dare answer that door without me!" I said as he ran to the door and I ran out of the kitchen to stop him from opening the door.

We grabbed for the door handle at the same time and as I opened the door the person before us wasn't who we expected to see. Standing before us was Emmett McCarty, the bastard who ruined the first five and a half years of my child's life. Before I really knew what I was doing I pulled Logan behind me and tried to shut the door as his foot stopped me from closing it all the way. "Please Bella, just let me explain." He said as I removed my hand from the handle.

Crouching down to Logan's level I looked him in the eye. "I want you to go up to your room, and don't come down unless dad or I come to get you, got that?" I asked as he looked up at Emmett. From the look on Logan's face I knew he was both frightened and threatened, I also knew that he wanted to stay here with me and make sure nothing happened, but I couldn't take the chance, not with how unpredictable I now knew Emmett to be. "Logan, I'll be okay, nothing is going to happen. Your dad will be here any minute, and he'll take care of the problem, I promise."

I glared, not at me, but at Emmett before looking at me. "Fine, but if I hear anything bad I'm coming down here." He said as he stomped upstairs to his room.

"He reminds me of Edward when we were his age." He said as I glared at him.

"You don't have the right to be here in my, no in our home, what are you doing here?" I said sharply, trying to get him to leave.

"I know you don't want me here" I scoffed "especially not on Christmas eve" I raised both my eyebrows, "or at all" I nodded. "But I came to apologize." Another rise of the eyebrows "I'm sorry I screwed up your life, I'm sorry I screwed up that kids life. I never should have tried to keep Edward away from either of you, it was wrong of me, and I'm sure that kid probably could have used a father. I'm sorry for telling Edward that hockey was more important than your relationship, when I first told him that, it wasn't even really about hockey; I was jealous that you guys had something that I had always wanted. I've made a lot of mistakes, and I've lost my best friend because of them, I feel horrible." He said, but the entire time I couldn't help but wonder if he was really being sincere about it all.

"Come in" I said as he stepped in to the hall, "if you knew they were mistakes, why did you make them in the first place?"

"Jealousy mostly." He said simply. "When Edward first told me that he had met a girl, I was really happy for him. Growing up he was always really picky about girls, he never dated a lot, and he didn't use his hockey player status to hook up with girls, not like many of us did at that time. He knew that every girl wanted to be with him so they could say that had been with Edward Masen, eventually make them feel better about themselves; everyone knew Edward would play professionally one day. But Edward, he never allowed that to happen. He didn't have the best home life, sure he had everything wanted, but Elizabeth and Edward Sr. only wanted Edward to pursue hockey to better the family name, it was all they cared about. It took him a while, but he no longer talks to them, hasn't in six years. As time went on, and he started talking about you more frequently, disappear on the off days, that's when I knew it was getting serious; then came that day at the arena when I met you for the first time. It was then that I realized I was loosing my best friend, that I was loosing him to you, I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't let it happen even though I knew that you were his one, so I put my shellfish needs ahead of you. I couldn't loose him to you, you were so young, and we had been through everything together, elementary, middle, high school, college, everything, we were even drafted together, we were brothers. As your relationship progressed I felt more and more like our friendship didn't matter anymore.

One day I finally let my jealously consume me, and I made the point to tell Edward that he was letting some silly teenage girl get in the way of his career. That if he didn't stop dicking around, sooner or later he was going to ruin everything he had worked for, and he would just be another hockey player who never amounted to anything. I knew I was wrong, he had been playing better than I had ever seen when you were together, and the moment he left my apartment I wanted to take everything I had told him back, but I couldn't, what was done, was done. I never thought that he would listen to me that he would break up with you but before I knew what was happening you two had broken up. I couldn't tell him the truth without making him hate me, and that way; he would surely never want to be around me again, I was a coward. The day you came to give him the letter I could tell from the first moment I saw you that you were pregnant. I knew I had screwed up the best think in his life, and I made up some excuse to make you go away because I didn't want him to see you, I felt guilty for doing what I had.

He had just barely started to get over the break up, and if he had seen you, or even caught a glimpse of you, he would relapse, go back in to zombie mode, so I lied. I told you he moved and changed his number, so that you wouldn't try to contact him. After that I panicked, I took the letter and hid it, from him, and mostly from myself, because it was just one more secret that I would have to keep. A couple weeks after I did think about giving the letter to him, I never read it, so I don't know what was in it, but I couldn't. I didn't want to loose my best friend, so I didn't give it to him. When Edward found the letter last week, I was so surprised. I didn't even remember that the letter was in there, I thought that I had taken it out, hid it somewhere, destroyed it. When he confronted me, I had no idea why I said the things I said, maybe because I was embarrassed, but I never meant them, and the day you came, Bella I was so wrong to say that I said to you. I embarrassed myself, but I embarrassed you as well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about everything, and the moment I see Edward, I'm going to apologize as well." He said as I shook my head.

"Apology not accepted" I said as he looked at me bug eyed, unknowing that Edward had been standing behind him for the whole one sided conversation. "Emmett all I heard there were a bunch of you being sorry you were jealous, and you making one to many excuses for yourself. Yes, you were trying to explain your actions, I get that, but an, 'I was jealous' would have sufficed. That day, you didn't just make the decision to take a father away from a little boy; you made the decision to one day loose your best friend. Did you honestly think that you could keep a little boy away from his father for the next however many years? I know my son, and more importantly I know me. Logan is young, and yes I made the decision for the time being to keep my fathers parentage away from him, but did you think once he got older I wouldn't tell him? Logan would start looking, as he got older, and trust me, he wouldn't stop until he got answers. So no, I can't except your apology, because all it was, was a giant excuse."

"I can't either" Edward said as Emmett spun to look at him. Edward had been leaning on that wall from the moment Emmett started explaining himself, he listened closely, but he was angry and sad; I knew he was wondering how his best friend could do that too him. I knew that to Edward, there was nothing they could do to repair the broken friendship they now that, that for Edward, it was done for good.

"Edward" he started as Edward shook his head and walked toward the door to show Emmett out. "Edward, come one, we need to talk about this." He said as Edward pushed him up against the wall.

"You have no right to tell me what we need to do Emmett! You ruined our friendship six years ago when you took that letter from Bella. For the last six years you have basked in the glory of ruining a relationship between two people, from taking a father away from an innocent child. The things you said to me, and to Bella; yes I know everything, Sidney told me; were absolutely unforgivable. If you truly are sorry, you never would have done what you did in the first place." Edward said as Emmett was pushed against the wall, honestly looking scared despite the fact he was a good two inches taller than Edward. At that moment I saw the desperation in Edward's eyes, and he honestly looked as if he was about to punch Emmett.

"Edward, not with Logan upstairs." I said as he looked at me and nodded. He backed away and opened the door motioning for Emmett to leave, and he did. I watched as he walked out and got in his car driving away, as I shut the door and turned around Edward was suddenly no where to be found.

Hearing voices from upstairs I started toward Logan's room, and sure enough that was where Edward was hiding out. "You know Logan, some people do the things they do because they think what they're doing is best, but it's really not their decision to make. And Emmett, we I let him make a decision in my life that cost me so much more than I originally though." He said making a tear fall down my cheek.

"Do you love her?" Logan asked, which I guessed had something to do with their conversation.

"Yes, more than anything, and I love you too." Another tear.

"Are you going to marry her? Are we going to be a family?" he asked, sounding so hopeful.

"Yes, if she wants to marry me. Even if she doesn't Logan, I'm still your father and no matter what, or who stands in my way I will always be there for you, no matter the circumstance." My hand flew to my mouth, right there, that was the answer I had wanted to hear for the longest time. Edward wanted to be with our son, even if sometime in the future that future didn't include me. This right here, his words, were the words that ever child need to hear. I knew then that even if Edward's deal didn't work out he wasn't going to let hockey get in the way of the three of us being a family, and neither would I.

Wiping away the tears I knocked on Logan's door, acting like I had heard nothing and smiled at my boys, my two favorite boys. "So who is ready to go to the city?" I asked Logan looked at the floor and then at me.

"Mom, I know we've always gone skating because it was a tradition with your parents, but this year, can we just stay home, as a family?" he asked me as I leaned against the door.

"You know what Logan, that sounds like a good idea." I said as I pulled him and Edward into a hug. It was that moment that the doorbell sounded again and I looked at Edward. "Why don't the two of you pick out a couple movies and I'll take care of the door." I said, leaning over to Edward to give him a quick peck.

"Ewwwww" Logan called from the movie cabinet causing me to roll my eyes. The doorbell sounded again and I pushed myself up from where I was sitting and went to answer the door. "Ryan, hi, I wasn't expecting you, what are you doing here?" I asked suddenly. It looked as if something was wrong, and Ryan usually wasn't the type of guy who went to another person when he had a problem.

"Can I talk to you for a little Bella, I know you and Logan usually go out, but, it's about Rosalie." I nodded, Rosalie, why the hell would Ryan want to talk to me about Rose? "How about we go in to the kitchen?" I said as he followed me inside.

"I'm sorry to barge in Bella." He said as I looked at him and shook my head.

"No, I know that you would do the same for me, don't apologize. Now what is this I'm hearing about Rosalie? Coffee?" I asked setting a mug and some cream and sugar on the counter.

"You're never going to believe me if I tell you." He said as I rolled my eyes.

"Try me"

"Rosalie, well she's been very careful with this situation." He said quietly looking mostly at the counter while he talked. "She, well she's hasn't told anyone about us, but we've been seeing each other for seven, almost eight months. I've wanted to tell you, to tell everyone, I love her, but something hasn't allowed her to be happy enough to share it with everyone." He said and I could see that he was hurting about it all.

Honestly, so was I. My best friend since childhood had kept one of the single most important details in her life from me, why would she do that? I looked down, trying my hardest not to seem angry, but I didn't know how to act right now. "And now she's pregnant. Pregnant, with twins, we just found out, and I don't know what to do." He said as my hand flew to my mouth.

"Oh Ryan" I said as he gulped.

"I'm so happy to be a father again, more than anything, I love Rosalie. But I don't want to keep us a secret anymore, I want Rosalie and I to be able to love each other unconditionally, without any past lovers haunting our every move. I'm afraid that she isn't ready for all of this, to become a mother, for our relationship to be known. It's a mess, and I want to marry her, but since no one knows about us, I don't know what to do." He said as a tear fell down his cheek.

"You really love her?" I said quietly as he nodded. I had to put my hurt aside for the two of them, they had twins on the way, and a relationship no one knew about, this really was messed up. "Ryan, she's my best friend, and I may not understand some of the things she does, but she's been through a lot. Royce did a number on her, he really screwed her up; knowing Rosalie she didn't want to say anything because she is afraid that one day you aren't going to be there."

"I know she's afraid Bella, but I am too. Love works both ways, Royce hurt Rose in the worst possible way, but I know what it's like to get hurt. When Kate got pregnant, she was always so angry, but I promised to take care of her of the baby. We tried so hard to be together to have a happy life together, but when the baby got here she signed over her rights, each and every one of them so she could go off and act like a nineteen-year-old girl. I had to do everything by myself, and it was hard, it hurt knowing she didn't want to be there, but I'm trying to be the best father for Alex, and trying my best to move on." He said as I looked at him.

"Can you promise her that you will be there for the rest of her life, for richer or poorer, for better of worse? Ryan, she'll take those vows very literally and you may fight and be angry, but you can't leave her."

"Bella, I made a mistake with Kate, but I got my son out of it and I love him more than anything. With Rosalie I know, I know she's the one, she's my soul mate. I trust Rosalie, I love Rosalie, and she loves me, better yet she loves my son; and I know that if anything ever happened to me she would take Alex in and treat him like on of her own." He said as I looked at him.

"Then don't tell me this, tell Rosalie. If you're asking for my blessing, you have it, just make sure that you really want this. I trust you Ryan, you're a good guy, but Rosalie is my best friend."

"Thank You Bella, for letting me vent, for talking to me, for your blessing. It's so important that I got this out, I just hope Rosalie will talk to me." He said as I gave a little half smile, walking him to the door.

As I walked into the living room where the boys were setting up camp I couldn't help but think about everything Ryan had told me. For so long my best friend kept the single most important secret in her life from me, and it hurt, but down deep I was happy for her. Rose deserved more than anyone to be happy, she was an amazing person, and Ryan was a great guy for her. How Ryan explained everything to me, it seemed like they were happy together, but I knew Rosalie was afraid. That aside, I hoped that they could move things aside and be happy, after all, they had twins on the way.

I couldn't help but smile though, somehow, everything was coming together. Sure, it took a lot of yelling and fighting, and lies and deception, to get here, but here we were managing. I knew that things from here could only get better, and I just hoped that they would be better than I could ever imagine.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine  
Bella Swan  
December 25, 2012**

Lying in bed this morning I couldn't help but smile. The last couple days had been so perfect, especially yesterday. After Ryan left the three of us, Logan, Edward, and me, spent the entire day pigging out on junk food, watching movies, and just being a family. It was days like these that I wished could have happened from the start, but unfortunately that wasn't the case. Despite the fact that we hadn't carried out or normal Christmas traditions I wasn't angry or disappointed, I was actually quite the opposite. Doing what we had yesterday, it made it feel as if we were a real family. But lying here, just lying here with Edward, it made me smile.

"You awake" Edward spoke in a husky, I just woke up voice.

"Mhm" I murmured as I scooted in to the crook of Edward's left arm. Opening one I eye looked at the clock and groaned; 6:31, any minute now Logan would come barging into the bedroom to wake Edward and I so he could open his presents from me. Afterward I would make a small breakfast, something to hold us over until we got to Carlisle and Esme's for the rest of the presents and dinner.

Several minutes later as Edward and I laid there, cuddled in each others arms the sound of little feet on the hardwood floor could be heard outside the door. Slowly the door creaked open and Logan's head popped in. "Mom, mom, mommmmmm" he whined as he tried his hardest to rock me back and forth in an effort to wake me up.

"Is there something I can help you with?" I yawned, causing Edward to open one eye.

"Wake up! It's time to open presents!" he chanted, now crawling up on to the bed as he started to jump up and down. "Wake up! Up, up, up, up!" he laughed. Eventually, Edward who had appeared to be asleep the entire time grabbed Logan around the waist, pulling him down on the bed as he started to tickle him. "Dadddd" he whined as Edward continued his tickle attack. "Uncle!"

So Edward lifted his arms from tickling Logan and instead crushed him in between the two of us. "You know, I thin we should go back to bed. What do you think babe?" Edward asked as he winked at me. I laughed then nodded,

"You know, I am still a little tired. Logan, wake us up in a couple hours." I said as he wiggled his way out from in-between us and placed himself on Edward's chest with his arms crossed. "Oh fine, I guess we can get up so you can open your presents." I said as I poked him in the stomach.

A huge smile spread across that kids face and he quickly ran out of the room and down the stairs to the living room where he would wait. Crawling out of bed Edward and I groaned as the cold air hit our legs. Sprinting across the room I tripped over the rug in front of my closet, catching myself on the doorframe and laughing as I went to find myself a pair of sweats and long socks. "You think you would be used to winter here after living here your entire life." Edward joked making me roll my eyes.

"Oh sush, I saw that shiver." I said as Edward yelled up the stairs. "Christ, you think that kid would have a little patience." I said as Edward mumbled, something along the lines of 'just like his mother' under his breath.

Rather than saying something I ignored him and grabbed his hand, dragging him down to the living room where Logan was impatiently waiting. At this moment there weren't many presents underneath our tree. A majority of Logan's gifts were at Carlisle and Esme's, waiting to be opened in front of the family. Then there were his gifts from his grandparents and aunts, from Ryan and Alex (who always spent Christmas with us), and the remainder of his presents from me. Right now, he just had a couple, like a new video game, a couple of new hockey sticks. Logan was growing so quickly and his sticks were therefore quickly becoming to short for him, so I was hoping the three new ones I had purchased would work for just a little longer. There were also a few things under the tree for Logan, from Edward. I wasn't entirely sure when he had the time to buy anything for him though, I mean we (the three of us) had spent practically every minute together since he found out, so I was really confused.

I had always loved these Christmas mornings, stealing a few hours together before the entire family got together, before I was stuck putting toys together and cooking dinner. I loved our relaxing Christmas mornings. As usual there was nothing under the Christmas tree for me. I got what I wanted through-out the year and well, I would have to take Logan to get something for myself, so it just really wasn't worth it. I knew there would be things for me at Carlisle and Esme's, but at home, well it was more so for Logan than anyone else. Well this year, it was about Edward as well, our first Christmas together as a family. I had picked up a few things for Edward, but nothing special; so when he handed me a present, I really wasn't expecting it.

I gasped, there in a square Tiffany's box, I was surprised to see a pair of diamond solitaire earrings. With tears in my eyes and a smile on my face as gave a girlish squeal and leaned in to give Edward a chase kiss. "Oh Edward, this, these, they're beautiful." I stuttered, giving him another kiss.

He smiled, "After everything you've been through I thought you deserved something special." Another kiss was given before Logan went back to opening the rest of his presents.

"Thank you, they're beautiful." I said as I leaned further in to him, his arms wrapping around me. Right now, we were the family that I had always wanted us to be. After Logan finished opening his presents I went into the kitchen and made some muffins, just something small to hold us over.

An hour later the three of us were walking out of the house dressed in our Christmas best. I was wrapped in my white pea coat and as I darted from the house to the car where Edward climbed in the drivers seat and Logan buckled himself in the back. "Alright, now please remember to say thank you to everyone when you open your presents at Nana and Pop's." I reminded Logan as Edward drove in the direction to Carlisle and Esme's.

"I know mom" he said as he rolled his eyes. "You tell me the same thing every year, and every year I tell you the same thing." He said, once again proving to me that he acted much older than he actually was. Edward must have thought the same thing because it was at that moment he started laughing. "I told you that he's five going on fifteen. Maybe by the time he actually is fifteen he won't act like it?" I told Edward as he continued to laugh at me.

"I highly doubt it, it takes us boys forever to grow up." He said causing me to groan. "But if it counts for anything, I love you and our oddly wise five year old son." He said as he rested his right hand on mine.

"I love you too" I smiled as Logan who was looking out the window made a barfing sound in the back, causing us all to start laughing again.

**Edward Masen  
December 25, 2012**

As I continued the drive to Carlisle and Esme's I couldn't help but keep a constant smile on. Hearing her say those words, hearing 'I love you' come out of Bella's mouth, it made me the happiest person ever. I had my family, my beautiful girlfriend, and our son; son, god I couldn't get used to saying that word. I was so proud, so happy to be a father, and though I missed the beginning years, I was here now, and I was going to make these years count. After everything that had happened Bella was so understanding, so willing to try and let things workout between us so Logan wouldn't continue to be confused about why his father wasn't around, and now here I was, spending Christmas with my family.

My family, the word made me smile, but at the same time, I didn't want to leave at the end of next week. I wanted to stay here, with my family. They were the first real family that I had ever really had. They wanted to be with me, love me because I was me, not because of the things I have accomplished, or where I am going to end up, they don't love me for the material things. Since I first met Bella she made me realize that as much as everything in my home life sucked, I had it better than other people. Yeah, my parents never really showed me, or told me they loved me, but they gave me everything I had wanted. I knew they wanted me to pursue hockey because it bettered the family name, but at the same time they pushed me to do something, to continue something that I loved. The subtly behind it was that they were showing me how I could succeed if I just strived for the big goal in life, and years after starting I had gotten just that. My parents, well they did what they had to do in order to get what they wanted, they were compassionate about their jobs and their money and what people, society mostly, thought of them. The way they treated me, well I was just collateral damage I suppose. The relationship I had with my parents, well it had been strained for a long time now, we no longer spoke, and I'm not sure I wanted to speak to them. I didn't want them around Logan; I didn't want Logan to think the same things that I had thought growing up. I want to teach my son that he is loved more than anything and always will be, and if there is ever a point in time that hockey is no longer something he wants to do, well he doesn't have to do it. The decisions in his life are his alone to make.

It was things like these that I had learnt from Bella all those years ago. Bella, well she had been through her fair share, and it was a lot worse than anything I had gone through. Her parents were self-made millionaires, who were killed in a car accident when Bella was a teenager. But they had raised her the way she had begun to raise Logan, that it was okay to make mistakes as long as you learnt from them; that yes, there were going to be bumps along the road and moving past them may be difficult but you have to strive to succeed and try your hardest at everything you do. You have to do this even if you don't want to because getting to the end result is going to make you look back at the difficulties and realize just how much they didn't matter anymore.

It was this that brought my back to my thoughts about moving to New Jersey. Sure I loved Bella and Logan, and I wanted to be with them all the time, but despite what happened I didn't want to leave my team. Coming to New Jersey meant a lot of unanswered questions, where was I going to live, would Bella want me living with them, an apartment of my own in case things didn't work out? I seriously hope that they will though, Bella, well she's the girl that I want to be with for the rest of my life. If I was brought back to six years ago knowing that Emmett wasn't to be trusted things would be different between us. I would have stayed to help Bella, and I would have married her, but were things supposed to be this way? Were we meant to be apart and return to each other despite what and who stood in our way?

"You've been quiet the entire ride, what are you thinking?" Bella asked me, pulling me from my thoughts.

"My parents, the move, what happened. Everything, it's all so confusing." I said as she looked at me.

"Have you talked to them?" she asked me quietly. "Your parents, have you talked to them?"

"No, I haven't talked to them in five years."

"What, why?"

"I'm sick of the way they treat me, sure they pushed me to do something that I love, but they never cared about that. All they cared about, no all they care about is what people think of them. I don't want to be part of that, I don't want to drag you or Logan in to that."

"Oh" she said as she looked down at the floor sadly.

"Bella, don't give me that look."

"I think you need to talk to them. What if something happens Edward, what if something has happened? Life is to short to avoid people, to hold grudges. I wish every day that I had the opportunity to talk to my parents again, to tell them I loved them, to introduce Logan to them, to show them my life; but I can't do that. You can, don't punish them for something that happened in the past, because it's exactly that, it's in the past." She said wiping away a tear that had escaped from her eye. "We're here." She said, I hadn't even notice that I had remembered the way to Carlisle and Esme's, and now here we were, for Christmas.

"What is everyone going to think of me being here? How are they going to react to me just suddenly being back in your life? I mean, I know Esme doesn't hold a grudge against me, or at least I don't think she does, but what about Alice or Rose? They're your best friends, they probably hate me Bella, they think I broke your heart." I said after Logan climbed out of the car and ran in to the house.

"You honestly have nothing to be worried or nervous about Edward. They understand that what is in the past is in the past. And honestly, they more so blame Emmett for what happened than you. Though I think all three of us are guilty, but they blame Emmett."

"But I did break your heart Bella, you were pregnant when I left, you were only a teenager, and I should have realized what was inevitable, I should have been more careful. I feel horrible everyday."

"Don't!" she said pointedly. "Look, it's Christmas, lets talk about this later."

I nodded and looked up at the house for the first time in six years. The house looked grander than I remembered it, maybe it was because it was covered in snow, or maybe it was because I didn't remember it correctly, but I was happy to join them for this holiday. I followed Bella up the shoveled path and into the house; rather than ringing the doorbell she walked straight inside, making me smile. I've always wanted to be comfortable to the point of just walking in a house rather than knocking, but it had never happened. As I looked around the inside I smiled at the house, every inch was decorated for the holiday, or well every inch that I could see. A huge Christmas tree at least eight foot tall sat in front of the wall of windows at the back of the house, decorated in burgundy bows and gold beads with an angel at the top, a ginormous pile of presents sat around the tree and stockings were stuffed full. The large house just had the homey air to it, unlike my parents house which was decorated to the nines making many people realize that if you touched anything it could breath.

Bella, like me, was taking everything in, and smiled as Rose and Alice made their way toward us. "Hey guys, Merry Christmas!" Rose said as she drew Bella into a quick hug. Logan ran out of the kitchen with a cookie in his hand with Esme close behind chasing after him.

"Merry Christmas" Alice and Bella both said at the same time as Rose picked Logan up. I saw Bella's eyes go wide before she grabbed Logan from Rosalie, making Rosalie look at Bella funny.

"What's with you?" she asked Bella as she shook her head.

"Nothing, nothing, are Ryan and Alex here yet?" Bella asked her quickly, trying to change the subject.

"Um no, not yet" she gulped nervously, "We're just waiting for the two of them to arrive before we open the presents" she said as the doorbell went off. She hurried to the door as Alice looked at us, obviously oblivious as to everything that had just happened.

"Oh Bella, Edward!" Esme said as she came out of the kitchen, Carlisle following right behind.

"Merry Christmas" they said pulling us each in a hug as Ryan, Rose, and Alex came around the corner. Yup, today was about to get interesting.

**Bella Swan**

When I first saw Rose I couldn't help but be a bit awkward, I was the only one other than Ryan who knew, I didn't know what to say around her, not with knowing their secret. And when she picked up Logan, well maybe taking in from her arms wasn't the right things to do, but I didn't want her to get hurt. I needed to calm down and hope that Ryan's plan was going to go accordingly, because I knew how Rose could me. All I wanted was for her to be happy, and after Royce it's exactly what she deserves. As Rose went to get the door the six of us made our way in to the living room, Esme had a try of cookies and nine glasses of hot chocolate sitting there waiting for all of us, and it was then that Rose, Ryan, and Alex walked into the room. I smiled at Ryan as he gulped nervously, Carlisle smiled at Esme and gave her a chaste kiss when he thought no one was looking, making me smile. Twenty years from now, I wanted Edward and I's relationship to be like that.

"Merry Christmas" Ryan said as he looked at Edward, his eyes widening.

"Oh Ryan, Alex, this is Edward, Logan's dad." I said as Ryan shook his hand and Alex blatantly stared at him.

"You play for the Penguins!" he said to Edward before his eyes turned in to slits. "Wrong team! The Penguins are cheats!" he said causing everyone to bust out laughing at the little boys disregard for manners.

Edward opened his mouth in a way like he was about to say something important and then shut it. "I like to think we're opportunists." He said causing Alex to shrug and walk off in Logan's direction.

"Sorry about him, he's a little brash" Ryan apologized as Edward waved him off.

"No apology needed, it's fine." Edward said as we all found somewhere to seat.

"PRESENTS" Logan and Alex yelled at the same time causing all of us to laugh again.

"Alright, I think it's time to open some presents." Esme said as Carlisle started handing presents to everyone. When everyone had a gift we tour the paper off and continued this until it was time for the boys last presents.

"Alright boys, these are from me." Rose said as she handed each of them a large gift-wrapped box.

The boys were quickly surprised with signed jerseys from each of their favorite Devils players, making their faces light up. "No way!" was all you heard from my son's mouth as he pulled out his Volchenkov jersey. I smiled, it was nice of Rose to do this for Logan, especially because it was something I had wanted to do but wasn't able to.

I looked at Alex, whose eyes were wide, there in the box was the same present as Logan's expect a signed Patrick Elias jersey. "T-th-thanks Rose" he stuttered as he got up and gave her a huge hug. I saw tears from in Rose's eyes and Alex held on, and from this exchange I could tell that Alex already saw Rose as a mother figure, but was conflicted as to what he could call her. Rose always got the boys something similar, but never had she gotten him something like this. As he sat back down Alice handed the boys each an envelope, I knew that she had gotten the boys tickets to the February game against the Penguins, I just wish I knew where we would be at that time.

But in true Alice fashion the envelopes had large bows on them and a tag with their names. As they opened the envelopes they smiled, knowing exactly what they were, two tickets to the game. "Why are there two tickets?" Logan asked making her laugh.

"Well you very well can't go alone can you?" she laughed as they shrugged with smiles on their faces.

"Thank you Auntie Rose and Auntie Alice!" Logan said as he moved to give each of them a hug with a reciprocated kiss to the cheek. Alex followed Logan's lead with the thank you's before he whispered something in Rose's ear.

"Um, I have something to tell everyone, or well we do." She said as she linked hands with both Alex and Ryan.

"What is it dear?" Esme asked as Rose looked at Ryan and swallowed nervously. It was another moment before she took a deep breath and continued.

"Um, I don't know how to say this. I don't want anyone to be mad at me for not telling you this, but after everything that happened in the past, I was nervous to know if it was going to last, but it did." She said causing everyone except for Ryan, Alex, and me to give confused looks. "I've been dating Ryan for the last seven and a half months. The most wonderful seven and a half months of my life." She smiled lovingly at both Ryan and Alex before continuing. "But that's not all." I hadn't realized that she had meant to tell everyone that she was pregnant right now. I mean, getting a confession about her dating Ryan had to be difficult.

She smiled at Ryan, and then rested a hand on top of Alex's long blonde hair. "It, well, they weren't something that we had exactly planned for, but the last couple weeks I haven't been feeling my best. No one but Ryan knew I was under the weather, it was easy to hide because I only felt odd at various times, but I went to the doctors earlier in the week, and found something out."

From the moment she mentioned that she hadn't been feeling well everyone knew what was going to come out of her mouth. I had said almost the exact same words to everyone when I figured out I was pregnant with Logan; as much as Rosalie thought that everyone was going to be disappointed and angry with her and Ryan for keeping this secret I knew the babies were going to mask the anger. Esme would have two new grandbabies to dote over, Alice would have new babies to shop for, and me, well I would just be the doting Aunt. But Rose, Rose would finally be happy, actually happy. She would have someone who she could love and cherish unconditionally, and would love her just the same.

"Well, I found out that I was pregnant." She said as everyone started to talk loudly, giving their congratulations. "With twins." She said louder. It was in that moment that the talking ceased. Twins, well they were a big deal, especially in Rosalie's family. Rosalie's mother had a pair of twin brothers, and her great-grand mother was a twin as well. Everyone knew that this was going to be a responsibility, a challenge, but if anyone could do it, well it was Rosalie.

"Congratulations Rose, Ryan." I said to each of them as I leaned in to give the pair a hug.

"Yes, congratulations sweetie." Esme said, as she pushed her self up from where she was sitting. "Alright, well this is something that calls for celebration" she said as she moved in to the kitchen and quickly came back with seven wine glasses and a bottle of champagne. "Of this is such a good Christmas." Esme said as she poured, handing everyone except for Alex and Logan a glass.

"Umm, before we all toast, I have something else to say, or more so something to ask." Ryan said as I smiled at him. "Rosalie Lillian Hale, when I first met you all those years ago I wasn't sure what to think of you. You were outspoken, brash, cocky, but beautiful, smart, sarcastic, and I quickly found myself crushing on you. To you, it didn't matter that I had a son, and that his mother wasn't around, it just mattered that I was a good person, or so you told me. The past seven months have been the most exciting, the most special seven months I can remember, and I can't wait for the arrival of our twins. I love your so much Rosalie, and I promise that everyday for the rest of our lives no matter what happens I will continue to love you because you mean everything to me. So what I'm trying to ask you, is Rosalie, would you do me the incredible honor of becoming my wife, of becoming Alex's mother?" he said as he got down on one knee and pulled a velvet box out of his pocket.

Rose's eyes were watering, and she was biting her lip in nervousness, and the moment he opened that box she gasped. I gasped in all honesty. When Ryan came to talk to me the night before he hadn't shown me the ring, actually he hadn't mentioned ring; and now that I was looking at it I could see that it was the absolute perfect ring for Rosalie. Three ovals, the one in the middle slightly larger than the other two, suddenly she opened her mouth, "yes, yes, of course" she said as tears fell down her face and she nodded repeatedly. He slid the ring on her finger and leaned in, giving him a kiss, I knew know how happy Rose really was.

It was only a moment later when Alex tugged on her shirt, looking up at her with those big blue eyes of his. "Rose, does this mean that I can call you mom?" he asked quietly.

Bending down to his level she brushed a piece of hair out of his eye. "This means that not only can you call me mom, but that I love you and your father mom than anything." She said as he smile.

"Good" he said as he paused "I love you mom" he whispered, causing Rosalie to start crying again. Hugging him closer to her body.

A couple hours later, after we had put the boys toys together and they had a couple hours to play with them the girls had moved into the kitchen to talk and finish up Christmas dinner. "I hope you know how happy we are for you Rose." I said with a smile on my face as I tied an apron around my waist. "Your children, well they're probably going to be some of the most beautiful on the planet; if they're girls, god forbid them when they're teenagers, Ryan will be chasing every damn boy away from them." I said as Alice, Esme, and I started laughing, causing Rosalie to start chuckling with us.

"Ryan and I actually had this conversation last night, he's praying that they're boys, and so is Alex. I think Alex just wants someone to play hockey with, Ryan, well he says that he makes boys." She laughed.

"It's really sweet, the relationship you have with Alex." Alice said as Rose smiled and placed a hand over her heart. "You're his mother, more so than that bitch is." She said, talking about Kate, Alex's biological mother.

"He wants a mother, Kate has never been around. From the moment she found out she was pregnant with him she didn't want a single thing to do with him, with Ryan. Ryan had to beg her to not abort, and the moment she gave birth she signed her rights away to Ryan, promising to never come around. Alex, he's a good kid, the best kid I've ever known, and I love him like he's my own. It doesn't matter to me that we don't share the same DNA." Her answer made me smile, Ryan had told me how much Rosalie loved him and Alex, and now, well I got to hear it with my own two ears. The love between them was amazing, and I just hoped that someday Edward and I could have a love like that.

**Edward Masen  
That same day**

Listening to Ryan propose to Rose made me want the same for Bella and I. All those years ago, when Bella and I first started dating I had thought a lot about what our future would hold. I thought a lot about marriage, about children, and even though things got ruined I still wished for the same things, and I hoped that Bella would be the one I would share all that with.

Hours later as the nine of us sat down for dinner I looked back on the past twelve hours and inwardly laughed. Now, I hadn't an idea why I was nervous about coming here. These people, somehow it was easy for them to forget the past, to forgive me for all that I had done, and to treat me like family. They were Bella's family, and now, through her and Logan, they were my family too. Sitting on the large formal dining room table was an amazing dinner cooked by Esme and the girls. A perfectly cooked honey ham, stuffing, potatoes (both mashed and salt), cranberries, vegetables, green-bean casserole, everything that you could possibly imagine, we were going to be stuffed for days. Through-out dinner conversation was made, but it wasn't until dessert that people started mentioning the important things. Bella had talked with a few of the girls at her shop and they had decided to start opening her shop up for a larger variety of customers. Starting this summer they would be making specialty cakes, birthdays, wedding, bar mitzvah's, and others; she wanted to make the best of her culinary degree, and hoped that things would work in her favor. Then the conversation came to Alice.

"Do you two remember how I talked about the woman that came in from Manhattan and wanted me to send her samples of my clothes?" Alice asked Bella and Rose. While the girls nodded, her parents looked on at her confused. "About a week ago, give or take a few days, a woman came in to my shop, she had heard about it through the grapevine and was intrigued. Well she was fascinated by my designs, and gave me her card with her address on it, asking me to send her in a sample of my designs, so she could show her colleagues." She explained to her parents, filling in the blanks for not only them, but everyone else. "Well I got a call the day before yesterday, and it was her. After showing her colleagues my designs they showed the same fascination in them that she had. They talked to Cosmo, Vogue, Seventeen, Glamour, and they want to do a photo shoot of my clothes, then help me franchise; New York City, Chicago, Los Angeles, they want me to start a line. Fashionable clothes at a reasonable price, they think that I'll make a steal at it." She said as her parents showed nothing but pride in their features.

"So, on Monday I'm going in to Manhattan to meet with Carol O'Riley, the woman who basically discovered me, and we're meeting with a real estate agent who will take us to different properties within the city, I'm talking about Times Square, Soho, all the major shopping districts. Then we'll head back to her office and take a look at different properties across the country. So I'll spend a majority of the year traveling, overseeing the opening of different shops, training and hiring new people, they think by next spring I'll have six new locations open. Two in New York, one in Los Angeles, Chicago, Pittsburgh, and Miami."

"Oh honey, we're so proud of you!" Esme said as her and Carlisle offered a congratulations.

Today was filled with an endless amount of good news, with a toast already having happened earlier, Esme passed everyone an extra slice of pie with a scoop of ice cream. "I know we already toasted, but there are so many congratulations that deserve to be said. Rosalie, Ryan, you two are going to be amazing parents, Ryan you already are. These twins are a blessing from God and I know the two of you will take good care of your growing family. Alice, your mother and I cannot ask for a better daughter, you're an amazing, compassionate young women, and you've always worked your hardest, and now it's paying off. Going in to fashion design was a risky career choice, but after opening your own store and working so hard on your designs everything is starting to pay off. And Bella, lovely Bella; these last six years have not been easy on you, but in just the last couple months, and mostly the last couple years, its been a joy to see you truly happy again. You deserve the best for you and your family, and I couldn't be prouder. Edward, thank you for making our daughter, though it may not be biological, and our grandson happy, I can already see how amazing of a father you are and will continue to be. To our family, though it may be large and dysfunctional." Carlisle said as he took a giant bite of his chocolate cake.

"To family" we all repeated, biting in to the cake, in our odd, but completely clever way of toasting. As I rested my arm on the back of Bella's chair and looked between her and our son I couldn't help but be happy, one of these days, I was going to make Bella as happy as Rosalie and Ryan were.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten  
Bella Swan  
January 3, 2013**

"I don't want you to leave," I said to Edward as he traced circles on my arm. "The house is going to be so empty without you." I said as I rolled over so I could face him. In just a couple hours Edward would be making his way to the airport where Logan and I would say goodbye to him for a couple weeks, but right now, Logan was at school, and Edward and I were lying in bed in post coital bliss.

"I'll be back in a little over two weeks, and you are Logan are going to come up for that weekend after the Ottawa trip, then we'll pack everything up, and after that last road trip we'll move everything here. Then we can finally start our life together, for real this time." He said as he positioned himself over me, kissing away the tears that had started to fall. "I love you Bella, and that's all that matters." He said as he kissed me again.

It was the night before Edward was due to leave, or well early morning in this case since it was two o'clock in the morning, and his flight left at six. It really sucked that Edward had to leave us, even if it was just a couple weeks. The more and more we talked about him coming to live with us, here in New Jersey, I felt guilty. Why should Edward have to give up his team, his friends, his house, everything to come here? Why hadn't I offered to move Logan and myself to Pittsburgh? I felt horrible. The days following Christmas were absolutely amazing. Since Logan hadn't gone back to school until today Edward and Logan spent most of their time playing hockey and visiting me at work, since I couldn't exactly neglect my business. It was nice for Logan to have Edward around to give him pointers, and just ask hockey related questions that I couldn't answer. But every night I was home by six, meaning that the evenings, until Logan went to bed, were designated family time. Alternating with Logan's practices, three nights a week, and games, which could happen in the middle of the week or on weekends we were on top of things. One night Edward even surprised us with tickets to the Devils vs. Rangers game and we made our way to Madison Square Garden to watch the game, I think Logan liked that night the most.

In the days leading up to Edward's departure we spent a lot of time talking, and had decided that once he moved in we should start looking for a new house. A place large enough for the three of us, and maybe in some time, a growing family; it wasn't like the townhouse was that cramped but with Logan getting older, and more toys and hockey gear, I just didn't have enough space. And with Edward moving in in just a couple weeks, and all his belongings, well more space was definitely needed.

"So, Logan and I had a chat today" Edward said as we continued to lay there, cuddled in each other's arms. "When I picked him up from school today we went to get some ice cream, and, well he's afraid that I'm not going to come back from Pittsburgh." He said as I closed my eyes and gulped.

"What did you tell him?" I asked quietly, I knew that Edward was coming back, but after everything that had happened, in the back of my mind I was still afraid that Edward was going to disappear. That all of this, was just a cruel dream, a trick of fate.

"The truth. That there was nothing in the world that could stop me from coming back to be with my family; nothing that could stop me from being with my amazing son, and his beautiful, kind, caring, compassionate mother." He said as he leaned over to kiss me. "Maybe not in those words, but it was something like that." I laughed. "Hey! I mean it! You're the most beautiful women I have ever seen in my entire life Bella."

"You're just saying that." I said as I rolled my eyes.

"No, I'm not. There are no other girls, other women, that I have seen that compare to you. You're beautiful inside and out, you're ambitious, caring, sympathetic, and most of all, you took me back when you thought I had committed the worst crime possible; leaving behind you and our son. You hold a grudge, and you're hard headed, and sometimes you make me so angry, but I could never leave either of your behind, because it's these things that have made me fall in love with you all over again Bella. After everything we've been through, there is nothing and no one that can make me stop loving you."

I smiled, as much as this sounded like a proposal I hoped that it wasn't. It was way to soon for either of us to start thinking about getting married. After spending two weeks together we had just started to figured out who each person was again, we had our son to take care of, and as much as some of the things we had been doing reminded me of the old us, it didn't make me want to go back to that time. I liked the person I was today, and from what Edward just said he liked the new me too; and I liked the new him, but we needed more time to get used to each other. Moving in together was a big step, but we needed to in order to raise our son. Living together full time meant getting used to the other persons idiosyncrasies, and most of all, for Edward, it meant getting to known every little detail about our son. We were moving quickly, and I knew, no I hoped that marriage was on our horizon, but right now, well it was just too soon.

"Bella, are you okay? You look like you're going to be sick." Edward said as I looked at him. "Bella, baby, tell me what's wrong."

"I just, for a moment there, I thought that you were going to propose to me." I said quietly as he stared. "Not that I don't wand you to, but it's just to soon." I said, hoping that her understood.

"No, I wasn't going to propose" he said chuckling. "You're right, it is way to early, but I would like to live with you before I ask you to marry me. But, is marriage something that you want, in the future I mean?" he said and I looked at him smiling. "I mean, get married, have more babies, if you want, a big house, all of that?" he asked as I nodded.

"Yes, it is. But not right now, I want us to have some time to be just the three of us before anything else happens. I mean marriage and babies, it's what every girl dreams about, but right now, well I think the timing is all wrong." I said and he nodded, smiling at me. "I love you Edward."

"I love you too. Trust me, we'll talk about all of this plenty of times before I actually do ask you to marry you, and anyway the timing is all off. I'm in the middle of a hockey season, trying to get a trade, transfer, whatever, to work, you have a business that you're trying to run, and we have Logan to think about." He said, just making me happy that he understood where I was coming from. "And I really don't want to steal Rose's thunder, or have to work around Alice's work schedule, I think we'll get married when we have time, and when it's the right time, for us."

I took a deep breath, relieved that Edward understood where I was coming from. So maybe Edward and I moved fast, but right now the most important thing was making sure Edward and I were in a position to raise Logan and just be together. I wasn't ready to get married yet, right now I was content in being in a relationship with him, figuring out how to raise our son, together. I smiled, and snuggled closer in to Edward as he kissed my head, right now, I was happy lying here just like this.

Just a couple hours later Logan and I were watching Edward through the gate and on to the plane. The distance between the three of us was going to suck, but in a couple weeks we would going down to Pittsburgh to help him pack, and then soon after, he would join us here in New Jersey. But as he walked away, I couldn't help but think back to the day he left me, six years ago.

_Flashback_

_As the doorbell sounded I ran from the living room to the door where Edward was. His car was parked in the driveway, and he was standing on the stoop, waiting for me to open the door. It had been just a few days more than two weeks since I had seen Edward, and I was possibly more excited than I should be. It was hard, dating someone who was older than you, especially when said person lived in a different state, oh, and was a professional hockey player. With Edward's schedule getting pretty crazy these days, it was hard for us to see each other, sometimes even talk; so when he called, asking to see me today there was no doubt in my mind that the answer was yes. As I opened the door with a smile on my face I flung myself into his arms. The last couple days had sucked, I almost always felt nauseous, and seeing him would definitely take my mind off of being sick. _

_Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me tight to his body before he leaned his head down to kiss the top of mine. "We might want to shut the door, Esme will kill me if I let the heat out." I said as he nodded, picking me up and moving us forward as he shut the door behind us. As Edward slipped his shoes off and followed me in to the living room and I couldn't help but wish that one-day, this was him, coming home, to our own place. Our conversation flowed like it usually did, but there was something else, something that Edward was focusing more on, and though he was trying to be happy I knew he wasn't. _

"_Edward, are you alright? It looks like your brain is going to implode from thinking to hard." I said, and when he didn't answer for a minute I got confused, it wasn't like him to ignore me. "Edward?" I said a little bit louder this time as he jumped and ran his hand through his hair, he was nervous about something. _

"_What, oh sorry, what were you saying?" he asked nervously as I looked at him quizzically. _

"_Is there something wrong? Something that you might want to talk to me about?" I asked him as he took a deep breath. _

_The room was full of silence for a couple minutes before his sad eyes, full of forgiveness looked at me. "I think we should break up." He said as my eyes widened. _

"_What?" I asked as tears quickly flooded my eyes, "What are you talking about? I thought that everything between us was good, what did I do?" _

"_You're so young Bella, you should be dating boys your age; ones that you don't have to schedule time to be with. I'm so much older Bella, we both need someone our own age, and right now, I just need to focus on my career." He said as tears just poured down my cheeks. _

"_I DON'T want to date boys my own age Edward, I want to date you. Can't you see that I love you Edward? I thought that you loved me too, but apparently I was wrong." _

"_Bella I'm twenty years old, it's time that I need to use to focus on my career, so I can move farther, quicker." He said as another tear fell. I should have known that eventually hockey was going to get in the way; he promised that it wouldn't, but I knew it was. I was right; hockey changes everything. _

"_Then just go Edward" I said as I closed my eyes, and when I heard the front door close shut I opened them, he was gone, another person had left me. _

_End Flashback_

I shook my head, I didn't need to be thinking about that day. It had been six years since then, and as much as I hated to admit it, the six years I spent hating Edward and everything he had put me through, allowed me to become the women I was today. Asking questions about the past wasn't something that I wanted to do, I wasn't getting answers, so why bother. Edward and I were together now, through all the roadblocks, and people, we still found our way back to each other, and I was stronger, we were stronger, because of it. Years from now, I wanted us to be married with more kids, happy, and each and everyday thanking the fates for allowing us to find our way back to each other. Wiping the tears away I picked Logan up and walked to the car, taking him home to get ready, then off to school. I didn't have to worry about Edward, because I loved him, and he loved us, and I trusted that no matter what we would be together.

Later that morning as I walked into the café, I noticed Rose and Alice already sitting at one of the tables, munching on some cookies. I remembered that Rose and Ryan had had an appointment earlier this morning. Since Rose was 18 weeks along she would be able to find out the sex of the twins, well if they wanted to. I figured they would, Rose wasn't the type for a surprise, she often got frustrated and ended up ruining them, so if the babies allowed for it, I figured they would find out. So now seeing both Alice and Rose here, I figured that they did, especially because Alice looked like she was ready to pounce.

"There you are! What the hell took you so long? Rose was making me wait for the news until you got here!" Alice said the moment she spotted me, pulling me to the table where they were sitting.

"Sorry, leaving the airport was a little harder than I expected, then I had to get Logan to school, and I cleaned a little bit." I said with a shrug. "I didn't think you would come here right after, that's all." I said as they both nodded.

"Well what are they?" Alice asked impatiently, throwing her hands up in the air.

"Alright, before I tell you, I'm letting you both know, mostly Alice, that we already had the names picked out, so there is zero persuasion allowed." Alice groaned but nodded, agreeing to the terms, and wanting to find out the genders of the new babies.

"Alright, alright, now what are they?" Alice asked as Rose rolled her eyes and continued.

"Well, alright. We're having two daughters, two little girls." She said as Alice squealed. "Avery Madison and Naomi Rae Taylor. They're going to be absolutely perfect, I just know it." She said as we awed at their names.

Those little girls were going to be some of the most beautiful out there, especially with their parents genes. As they got older, well Ryan was going to have his hands full, the boys were going to be chasing after them. Rose was going to be an amazing mother, and the more I thought about babies, I realized how much I wanted another one. I knew there was plenty of time left, to have more kids, and that Edward and I still needed time together, but I really wanted another. I loved taking care of Logan when he was a baby; cradling him, rocking him, singing him lullabies, they were all things that I wanted to do for another baby. So maybe right now wasn't the perfect time, but eventually it would be.

So for the next hour Rose, Alice, and I just talked. It was nice to have a little time to sit down with them, without boy friends or children interrupting us. But like all good things, they ended up having to leave, and I had to actually do some work, just what I actually wanted to do. The last couple days I had taken to looking over the finances, seeing how we would be able to continue if we found ourselves living in Pittsburgh, or even opening another café down there. Before I knew it, it was three o'clock and I had to leave to go pick Logan up from school. Tonight was one of the nights that I sorely disliked, a night where I would have to rush to get him home, get his homework finished, and get him fed, all before he had to be at the rink by six o'clock for a game.

As much as I disliked these days I was glad for the distraction on Logan's part. I didn't want him to think about how Edward had gone back to Pittsburgh, so it was nice to have something to keep him busy, even if it was just for tonight. So in order to help me, Esme and Carlisle would be joining Ryan, Rose, and I at the game, giving Logan a chance to show off. I just hoped that he wouldn't try to show off too much; they were playing one of the best teams in the league, and I really didn't want Logan to get hurt. The kids on that team were really big, and I knew many of them were trying to impress their well-to-do parents, so there was no telling what would happen.

Making sure to dress warm for the game, I changed in to a pair of jeans, and a tan long sleeve shirt paired with a navy blue hooded vest and a pair of Ugg's, the average Bella uniform. Throwing on my glasses I grabbed my bag from where it sat on my bed and made my way to Logan's room where he was getting ready. "Logan, it's time to go!" I called as Logan ran out of his room and down the stairs. Before I even reached the bottom step Logan was out the door, waiting to load his hockey bag in to the back of my car.

Ten minutes later we were at the arena, after getting his bag out of the trunk, Logan carried his belongings in to the locker room, leaving me to find Rose, Ryan, Esme, and Carlisle all on my own. Sitting there in the bleachers, Rose and Ryan were holding hands, hands that were rested on top of Rose's growing bump. Esme and Carlisle were next to them, already in conversation, and the moment they spotted me they waved me over.

"You okay honey? You look a little green." Esme asked as I shrugged.

"It's just been a long day, Edward leaving this morning and all, not to mention I've been feeling nauseous all day. I don't know if I'm stressed or what, I think I might be coming down with a cold." I said as Esme put the back of her hand to my forehead.

"You don't seem warm." She said as I shrugged, then yawned. "Tired too? Maybe you've caught something, I mean with this time of year it's possible." Shrugging again I took my seat in between Esme and Rose.

I couldn't help but wonder why in the world I was tired. It was barely six thirty, and I hadn't been that busy today; maybe it was just the stress of running around today. As the game got going things quickly became heated. Logan's team had thankfully gotten the lead early in the second period, thanks to a nice goal by Alex and assisted by Logan, but it was just the beginning of the third period when shit hit the fan. Logan made his way off the bench and towards the goal when a kid from the other team checked him in to the boards. This kid was huge for his age, tall and chubby, and for Logan who was small and fast, this kid was a brick wall. The hit, clearly illegal, threw Logan to a ground with a groan, and from only a few seats away I could hear the kids mother yell. "Good job James! That'll do him in." my jaw dropped as I looked from her back to the ice where Jake and the team doctor had joined my son. Standing up and making my way toward her Rose tried to grab me as I pulled my arm away, her kid had deliberately hurt my son, and to top it all off they weren't even supposed to be checking like that, who the hell did she think she was?

Logan wasn't moving from where he had fallen on the ice, and Carlisle quickly joined in down on the bench and out on to the ice where he was checking Logan over. Lifting my son up, gear and all, I could see everyone stop, and the stupid mother was still cheering as everyone else was silent. "Excuse me, but who the hell do you think you are? Cheering when a child is clearly hurt?" I asked as politely as I could muster.

"Oh honey, that's hockey. It's in the nature of the game for the boys to do as they see fit, and that includes checking." She said with a duh town as I looked at her pointedly. "I'm sure he's fine, the coaches just took him into the locker room to give him the once over."

Was she fucking kidding me? I seriously wanted to pounce on this women. "Yes honey, it's clearly in the nature to check, in professional, or even juniors hockey, not in a little league. And that boy who they're giving the once over, is my son, and he clearly isn't fine. Your son threw an illegal check and you're saying that's okay? For being a mother, you clearly don't express any concern regarding anyone but your son, and even though he deliberately hurt my son, I wouldn't wish the same on him." I said as the women's eyes narrowed.

"Look, I don't know who you think you are, but my son did nothing wrong."

"So hurting someone is just a slap on the wrist? Clearly your priorities need to be sorted out lady, because if you would have been paying attention you would have noticed that the puck was no where near my son who was going from the bench to the goal, alone. The only checks allowed in this league are poke checks to the puck, which you clearly don't know. I seriously hope that you've taught your son that hurting people is never the answer, because if you think what he did was right, you've clearly been raising your son with some foolish views of life."

"Are you questioning how I raise my son?" she asked me in disbelief.

"Yes I am!" she scoffed at me. "You think hurting someone to get what you want is the answer, and I can see just the type of person you are by the clothing you have worn to a child's hockey game." I said as I gave her the once over. A perfectly put together outfit, not a single strand of hair out of place, enormous diamond ring on her finger, pearl earrings and matching necklace. "You're the type of mother who made it a priority to marry in to a wealthy family, likely coming from a wealthy family yourself. You make it a point to flaunt that money in front of every person you come in contact with, especially the other parents on your child's hockey team because you think you're better from them. Your clothes tell me you're only here because you want everyone to know who you are, what you do, and who you're married too. And mostly, your actions tell me you're the type of mother that signed her child up play hockey so one day he might be good enough to play professional hockey, so he could better the family name. You're the mother who doesn't want what is best for her children, you care about what and who can better the family name." I said as I looked quickly to the women sitting beside her. "And another thing, that women beside you, isn't another mother to a boy on the team, she's the nanny. She's the one who makes sure that his homework is done, that he eats his vegetables, who gets him to and from school, and the women who makes sure that he is always on time for practice, because you clearly have more important things you can be doing. She's the women who brought him here today, and will reprimand him for his actions after the game, not you, because I know exactly who you are."

The snooty women rolled her eyes then took a glace at me. "You may think you know who I am, but I can tell who you are. A teenage mother, high school drop out who doesn't know who her son's father is. You're being supported by your parents and probably don't have a job because they pay for everything you, and your son needs. A nobody, who only has her son, and nothing else to live for." She said as I raised my eyebrows and laughed.

"Wrong, to almost everything. Yes, I had my son shortly before I turned seventeen, and no I'm not married to his father, but we're together. I finished high school, on time, and went to college, worked part time to support us despite the fact that I had my trust fund. As for my parents, they died when I was fourteen years old, and I lived with my best friend and her family until after I graduated college. I live in a town house that they helped me purchase as a graduation present. I run a successful business right here in Hoboken, the Eclipse Café. I support me, my son, and my business with no help from anyone; and heaven forbid I need to help, I pay them back, every single penny, plus interest, but I don't need the money, I have plenty of my own." Which was true, when my parents died, I inherited every single penny.

"So maybe I was wrong about all of that, but as for the father, what do you have to say about that? Let me guess some big dreamer who is the same age as you, trying to make his dreams come true. If it hasn't happened by now, it never will, he's clearly not here with you." She said with a roll to her eyes and a flick of her nails as I smirked at her.

"You ever heard of Edward Masen?" I asked as she laughed.

"Honey I don't live under a rock, he's a household name." she said as Rose handed me her phone, a picture, of the three of us on New Years, pulled up.

"Right sorry, I forgot it's something more grand, probably a bolder or a cliff. But if you would have been paying attention to the news lately you would have figured out that Edward Masen hasn't played in a game in just over two weeks. You would also know that he's been spotted in various parts of New Jersey with an unknown woman and a little boy, and lastly you would have known that he's been with his girlfriend, and their son, my son." I said as I flashed her the picture, he jaw dropping. "So maybe you thought you had me pinned, but you were wrong, and I know who you are Kate Denali. Your father Eleazar, works with my son's grandfather, Carlisle Cullen."

She opened her mouth and said nothing, as she grabbed her jacket off the back of her chair before storming out of the arena. The nanny, and a little girl with red hair followed behind her.

Turning around I looked at the faces of Rose, Ryan, and Esme who were clearly amused. "Look, I know I shouldn't have made a seen, but you don't cheer when my son is hurt." I said as the three of them bust out laughing. Jake was standing behind all of us, mouth wide open as he rolled his eyes and then motioned for me to follow behind him. Walking behind Jake with Esme we came in to the locker room where Carlisle and Jake's wife Olivia tried to comfort Logan. A bone was sticking out of his left arm and I winced as Carlisle looked at me.

"A clean break to the right radius, we're going to take him to the hospital where I can set the bone and put in a cast. Eight to ten weeks in the cast, and then physical therapy, he won't be able to play the remainder of the season." Carlisle said as Logan groaned from where he sat on the bench.

"Pooooops" he whined causing us all to laugh.

"He'll come in the car with Esme and I, so I can get him straight in to set the bone. As for you, meet us there, call Edward, and let him know what happened." Carlisle said again as I nodded. Jake picked Logan up and out of the locker room where he followed Carlisle and Esme to their car.

I followed behind them before I was stopped by Rose and Ryan, "What's wrong?" Rose asked quickly as her eyes followed Logan being carried out to the arena.

"Clean break to the right radius, Carlisle is taking him to the hospital to set the cast the bone. Eight to ten weeks, plus physical therapy, he's out for the season." I said as she nodded. "I'll talk to you later, I have to call Edward, let him know what happened, and get to the hospital." I said as I turned, almost running in to the little girl with red hair and the nanny.

"I'm sorry about what happened to your son ma'am" the nanny said in a thick foreign accent. "Our little Victoria actually wanted to tell you something."

"I'm sorry for what mommy said. She only wants us to be perfect, I never wanted that little boy to get hurt. I hope that he's okay, James only did it because he wants to make mommy happy." She said as she looked at the floor the entire time.

Bending down to her level I smiled. "I a couple weeks he'll be perfectly fine sweetheart, and you tell your brother not to feel bad, but to not hurt someone like that no matter what, ever again." I said as she nodded. As horrible as it was that Logan had gotten hurt, I felt worse for those two little kids. Logan had Edward and I both to take care of him, while those two children were spending their time trying to impress their mother, what a crock of shit that was.

As I climbed into my car I took a deep breath. Once again I was nauseous and tired, but the night wasn't over; I still had to call Edward, and had to go to the hospital to make sure everything was okay, this was going to be a long night. As I started my car, I had never been more grateful for my Bluetooth being hooked up through the stereo system, it made things so much easier.

"Hey babe, is the game over already?" he answered after just one ring.

"For us, yes, but no not for everyone else."

"What do you mean? Is everything okay?"

"Yes and no, I'm on my way to the hospital." I said as I heard some noise in the background.

"What happened, what's going on?"

"Some little boy was trying to impress his stuck up pain the ass mother and sent a boarding check at Logan. Logan had just skated off the bench and was going toward the goal, no puck, no nothing. The kid came out of no where as fast as he possibly could and checked Logan." I said as I heard him groan, and the laughing in the background ceased.

"How bad is it? Or do you not know?"

"A clean break to the right radius, tore right through his skin. Carlisle was at the game and diagnosed it as best as he could. Carlisle and Esme took him in so they could get right in, I'm following behind; Carlisle will x-ray and set the bone when we get to the hospital, and the cast it. He said eight to ten weeks in a cast, and then mostly likely some physical therapy, so Logan won't be able to play the rest of the season."

"Dammit. Do you want me to come down there? I mean, I can leave now and be there by early morning."

"No, no, everything will be okay. I just wanted to let you know what's happening, I'll call you with the rest of the news later." I said, and when he said nothing back I knew he was still contemplating coming here. "Edward Anthony Masen, promise me that you're going to stay there. We'll be there on Friday night, and you can see us then. You can't miss anymore time, you've missed enough already."

"Alright, call me when you know more."

"Planned on it, alright I'm pulling into the ER now, I'll call you later."

"Love you"

"Love you too." And we hung up. Despite that he had just left, I missed him so much, but talking to him, despite the circumstances, well it made me feel better.

**Edward Masen  
January 5, 2013**

After what had happened the last couple days I was needless to say, stressed. Between having to leave my family behind, despite it being only a couple days, or weeks, and then what happened to Logan, I just wanted to go back to being with them full time.

Walking in to the locker rooms two days after being back was surreal. I was going to miss this place so much once I left, I really hated that I had to leave. As I brought my hockey bag from the trunk of my car to the locker room it was nice to see the familiar faces, Jordan Staal, Kris Letang, Ben Lovejoy. Marc Andre Fleury was walking off the ice in full gear, smiling at me. "Nice to have you back Ed."

I nodded, and of course since I wasn't paying attention, I ran in to the one person I was trying to avoid at all costs. "Oh hey Edward" he said nervously as I nodded. "Well it's nice to have you back." He said as I turned around to look at him.

"Haven't you heard that I'm not back for long?" I asked, I thought most of the team knew that I would be leaving for New Jersey in a couple weeks. "Bylsma and Lamoriello struck a deal, in order for me to be closer to my family I'll start playing for the Devils. I play in the home game against the Senators, and the last on the road trip, then I have a week to move my things to New Jersey." I said before walking off to Bylsma's office.

"Edward, come in" he said as I shut the door behind me. "As you know most of the team has figured out that you'll mostly likely be in New Jersey in a couple weeks." Quirking my eyebrows I looked at him.

"What do you mean most likely? I thought this was a done deal?" I said, quickly becoming angry.

"I just got off the phone with Lamoriello, apparently it isn't." he said as I looked at him pointedly. "Apparently he agreed to sign you without discussing it with anyone. It was basically a stunt to get some good publicity for New Jersey, and the other coaches and G.M. aren't happy about it. Nothing was run through the people it needed to be run through, and well basically, it looks as if you'll be stuck here in Pittsburgh for at least another few months." He said as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Does New Jersey still want me, or not?"

"Right now, I don't think so Edward. It sounds as if he's backing out of the deal. He doesn't want to upset the wrong people, and he's sorry about the trouble he's putting you through."

"He can't do this!" I yelled as I started to pace the room. "Don't get me wrong, I love it here, and I don't want to leave, but my family is more important. We can't be a family when I can't go back home, home is with them, and they're in New Jersey! Lamoriello said it was a done deal, he told me, he told you, it was a ton deal, he can't back out!" I continued to yell.

"There was never a written contract signed Edward, it was a verbal agreement, I would never stand, they mean nothing, because you never know who was telling the truth. Your best bet is to let your contract run out, and when it does try getting signed to the Devils."

"Fucking hell. I just singed a new contract in October. I'm here for another five years! I'm twenty-six years old, I'll be thirty-one by that time. And I know people can play well in to their late thirties, but what if they don't sign me? What do I tell Bella? That I was an idiot for believing what Lamoriello told me was true, that he's a douche and until my contract runs out I'm stuck here in Pittsburgh? She won't be happy, she has a life there, a business, family!" I yelled. I turned, this office wasn't exactly sound proof, so there was almost the entire fucking team, watching my break down. "Call Lamoriello and tell him that he made an agreement, and he better fucking stick to it."

"Don't you think I've tried that Edward? I've done everything I could to try and get this deal to stick, but the man won't budge. Their players and G.M.'s are pissed about this deal so it's highly unlikely that they will make room for you. So call your girlfriend and tell her what happened, I can't help that they changed their minds. Who knows, maybe she'll move down here with you." He said raising his voice.

"Son of a bitch!" I yelled, storming out of the office and slamming the door behind me.

"Edward, what happened?" Sidney yelled, followed by Kris, Chris, Jordan, and Marc.

"Lamoriello pulled out, I'm not going to play for the Devils, I'm staying here in Pittsburgh, fucking Bella is going to be so angry." I said as I plopped my ass on the bench, resting my head in my hands.

"Shit, you need a drink." One of the girls said as I looked at them.

"I might need more than one."


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven  
Bella Swan  
January 9, 2013**

After the terrible week that had unfolded before my eyes I was ready to get out of New Jersey and just visit Edward, things hadn't been the same since he left, and I knew that both Logan and I were ready to see him.

In the few weeks that Edward had been part of our family he made me realize how much easier things are when you have two people caring for a five year old instead of just one. I was so happy to finally have Edward around, to have him me helping out, sharing the burden, carrying the load; but now that his deal fell through, I didn't know how much longer we would have to be apart. I could tell he felt horrible about the whole thing, but there was nothing we could do about it, so in the last couple days I had put some serious thought into the moving idea. I knew that with Esme's and the girls' help, and checking in every once and a while on the bakery and financials, I would be able to keep my business here in New Jersey, which meant that I would be fine to go to Pittsburgh. But the only thing holding me back was the thought of taking Logan away from everyone that he had ever known.

It was a decision that was going to have to be made by both Edward and myself after a lot of thought. For Logan, there would be a lot of explaining, and probably some tears once he realized that Alex wouldn't be coming with us, and he would have to leave his team behind, but with promise to find Logan a good hockey team, some other extra curricular activities, and hopefully some new friends, I figured we would eventually be able to get him to agree. Getting Logan to agree would mean so much to Edward, to me, to us as a family, and hopefully it meant moving from Edward's apartment to a house, and growing as a family, it would mean something permanent.

For the last five hours this had been my thought process, over and over again. It had been an early morning for the two of us, and thankfully Logan had spent the last five hours sleeping, but in all honesty, I was thankful for the quiet. The last five days had been hell, in the span of five days, my boyfriend/father of my child/love of my life had left to go back to his very time consuming job in a different state, my child had broken his arm during a children's hockey game, and had been whining about the pain non-stop, and same boyfriend/father of my child/love of my life had been denied the deal that would allow him to be closer to his family; needless to say, the last five days had been hell.

As I pulled into the Consol Energy Center I was elated that Edward was just beyond the doors several hundred feet away. "Mom" Logan yawned sleepily from the backseat, making me realize that he was awake.

"Yeah, buddy?"

"How much longer till we get to see dad?" he asked as I realized how thankful I was that he slept the entire way, so I didn't get that question every ten to fifteen minutes.

"We just pulled into the parking lot, the arena is right there buddy. As soon as we get you out of here and get inside we should be able to see dad." No more than a minute later, as Logan threw off his seat belt and waited for me to opened the door we rounded a corner and walked into the building.

As we walked into the building I quickly had an idea as to where we would be spending most of our time in the next couple months. Pittsburgh was a bustling city, and I just hoped that if we did end up moving, like a figured we would, we would be able to find a safe neighborhood to live in.

Having to wake Logan up early this morning in order to get him dressed then out to the car, I hoped and prayed that he wouldn't be cranky today. Thankfully it seemed, so far, that he had made up for the sleep in the back seat, but who knew what would happen. I just hoped that him getting to see Edward would guarantee a positive mood for the entire day.

The farther we walked into the locker room the more I realized how important this place would become to me, to us, to our family, and it made me excited. Here I was automatically confronted with the scent of hockey player, it was familiar, and as odd as this sounds, its comforting. "Bella!" someone called as I turned around to see Sidney coming my way. "Hey how are you?" Sidney said to me before looking down at Logan. "Hi buddy, I'm Sidney."

Logan in some random bought of shyness buried his face into my neck so he couldn't be seen. "I'm good, and sorry about him, I'm not really sure why he's suddenly shy. He's usually very outgoing around new people" I said as he shrugged. "Have you seen Edward around?"

"Yeah, last I saw he was out on the ice, follow me." He said as he led the two of us through the locker room. "I'm sure he'll act himself once he see's his dad." He said motioning to Edward.

"Oh how I hope, all I need is for him to want to be carried around all day." I said as he laughed. "I mean, I've never really seen him get shy around new people, he usually warms up really quickly. I have to think that it's the broken arm, he hates that cast, and I know that he wants it gone." I said as he brought me to the bench where a majority of the guys were standing around talking, or watching the two guys in the middle of the ice jokingly fight.

"Oh not again" Sidney said as he rolled his eyes and started to laugh. "Masen, you might want to stop looking like an ass in front of your kid" he called as Edward stopped what he was doing mid-stride, giving whoever he was fighting with the upper hand, allowing him to tackle him down to the ice. "Yeah that didn't help." Sidney laughed as Edward skated over and grabbed a water bottle, squirting it in Sid's face before leaning down to give me a chaste kiss.

"Hey babe, hey bud." Edward said as Logan peered out from my shoulder to look at his dad. A smile automatically broke out on Logan's face as he reached his arms out to Edward who took Logan from me and settled him on his hip, before signaling that he would be back in a minute, as he took off on the ice, skating around in a circle to make Logan laugh.

I couldn't help but smile at my son and his father, they really were quite the pair and it made me realize how happy I was with my family together. "Hey Bell, does Logan have his skates with him?" Edward said as he skated back in front of me. Being the hockey mom that I am I raised my arm where his skates were already rested in my hand. "You're the best," he said as he sat Logan on the side of the bench, tying his skates on for him.

I leaned back against the boards, watching as Edward tied his skates, as the two of them skated around, playing, laughing, really acting like father and son, and a tear slipped down my cheek. I had always wanted this for my son, for our family to be whole, for Edward to play hockey with him, teach him, but reprimand him at the same time, but so, so good to him; and after years of waiting it was finally happening.

"What's wrong? Sidney asked me as I looked up at him shaking my head.

"Nothing, I'm just happy." I said as he looked at me with little to no expression. "After I left that letter and didn't hear anything back, I got it through my head pretty quickly that the three of us would never be a real family. Now here I am, looking at the one thing I thought was impossible, and I couldn't be any happier."

"Even with the deal falling through? I know how much you two were relying on that."

"I've been looking into things with my shop more and more, and as long as I get everything settled, we should be able to move here. I know its a lot, asking Logan to leave his friends behind, me leaving my family, but I know Edward would never let us leave, not for too long; and we're close enough for visits, I just, I hope that's enough for Edward."

"It is" a forgotten voice behind us said as I turned to look into the eyes of Edward. Logan was in the middle of the ice with Geno, laughing, with a hockey stick in his hand, as I looked into the eyes of my sons amazing father.

"Why don't you two go find somewhere to talk, I'll watch the kid." Sidney said as we nodded.

Edward set his stick in the rack, his gloves on the bench, before taking my hand and leading me in to the locker room. "Why didn't you tell me you were planning on moving here?" he asked me quietly as I looked up at him, he was about three inches taller with skates on.

"Because I didn't want to make any decisions without talking to you. We're a team now Edward, I can't make a decision without including you in this. We also have to think about Logan, I can't just uproot his life, he's five, this needs a lot of explaining, understanding for him; which means the two of us need to work together."

"I know that we had talked about this a little before I left, and I just want you to know that I've started to look for a house. I wanted to buy a place with more room. Where I could build Logan a practice rink in the back yard, where we had room to grow. I know its premature, but I love you Bella, and I want us to be a family."

I couldn't say anything, but a large smile spread across my face, and I literally jumped him. He didn't say anything as he wrapped his arms around my waist, picking me up so my face was level with his. I squealed as he kissed me before he stopped, looking up to the faces of his teammates and our son. "Alright, alright you two, enough of that." Sidney said as Edward picked up a puck and chucked it at Sidney.

"I just need to shower and change, then we'll go out for a late lunch?" Edward asked as I took Logan from Sidney.

"Fine by me" I said to Edward before turning toward Sidney. "Do you happen to have his shoes?" I started to ask as he held them up to me, making me smile. "Awesome." Handing Logan his shoes he walked over to sit in Edward's little area, tying his work boots on.

I couldn't help but smile, and take pictures, iPhones were the best inventions ever. Taking Logan and his skates I walked out to my car to add Logan's skates to the rest of our things as we waited for Edward. I was excited to get to drive around the city, to get used to the idea of where we may be living within the next couple months, and maybe scout out a couple areas to live, but this all depended on how Logan took the news.

I knew that Edward and I would have to make the best decisions for our family, and we couldn't let Logan dictate them, but he was the whole reason we were together, and this did affect him.

Edward walked out into the parking lot where Logan and I had decided to wait for him, and I smiled. He donned a pair of jeans and work boots, much like Logan, and then had a flannel shirt, a guys cardigan, and then a winter jacket on top, complete with a snap back hat. I had to admit that I was beyond happy to have this wonderful, gorgeous man, to look at every day, I loved it, and it wasn't something I would get sick of quickly.

Leaving Edward's car behind the three of us piled in to my Audi, this time with Edward driving, zooming around Pittsburgh. My hand sat in Edward's on the center consul; we had taken to driving through the suburban areas in Pittsburgh, when I saw it, the perfect house.

The bottom part of the foundation was made entirely of pieces of stone, next were pillars that help but the porch that wrapped almost the entire way around the house. Complete with beige/grey siding, and plenty of windows, and a second or maybe third floors, the house looked absolutely stunning from the outside; and it just had to be for sale. "Edward stop!" I said as he pulled over to the side of the road.

"What's wrong?" he asked as I looked into the backseat where Logan had fallen asleep again.

"The house, it's perfect." I pointed, as he turned to look at the house across the road. "Can we please, please go in and look? It say's it's an open house!"

"Sure, why not." He said, taking the keys from the ignition, and picking Logan up out of his car seat, resting our sleeping son on his shoulder.

As we walked through the front doors of the house, I was immediately amazed. Dark hard wood floors, an open floor plan, the stairs were curved with an intricate design on the railing, and the same dark wood. "Hello there, how are you?" the female real estate agent said as we stood there in awe.

"Hi" I said as I shook her hand. Edward held his out afterward, trying his best to not rustle Logan around too much.

"I'm Maggie Olsen"

"Bella Swan"

"Edward Masen, and our son Logan."

"The hockey player Edward Masen?" she asked as Edward blushed, then nodded. "My son is a big fan." She smiled before she started showing us around. "The house is a new build, the original owners didn't get the chance to move in, as sudden move and a new job, and so they're selling."

"How much is the house selling for?" Edward asked as we stood in the kitchen.

"The asking price is set at half a million, but the owners are willing to negotiate." She said as I stared at Edward with wide eyes. "I'll let you explore on your own for a little, how about you come and find me once you're finished?" she suggested as the two of us nodded.

As I looked around the room more I realized how exquisite the kitchen was, it was a bakers dream. The hard wood followed into the kitchen, with an island in the middle with marble countertop. The wall behind the oven with made entirely of brick, a staircase following behind, leading to the second floor, and below. Two tall cabinets sat on either side of the oven then again on the wall where the sink, dishwasher, and fridge sat, the marble countertops following. All the appliances were stainless steal, a window was directly over the sink, and another farther up on the wall.

We made our way from the first floor downstairs. The basement was finished entirely complete with a bar. Another door led us to the laundry room, where another door held a downstairs bathroom. Out in the main room french doors were off to the side, and as we opened them we found an indoor pool. There were another three sets of French doors on the back wall that opened us to the fairly large back yard as Edward smile.

"What are you thinking?" I asked him as we looked out to the snowy yard.

"Homemade rink for Logan over there, and maybe a place for a dog." He said as I smiled, I could picture it too.

Closing the French doors we walked back through the bar/entertainment area, and up the stairs to the second floor. Once again the hardwood followed us all the way upstairs, there was a catwalk over looking the main floor, then a set of six doors. The first door we opened was a moderately well sized bedroom with an en-suite, the same with the next two doors. There was a linen cabinet, a door with another set of stairs hidden behind it, then the door to the master.

The master was what you would call perfect. The first thing I noticed was the balcony that looked out over the yard, then the wall of shelves. There was a fireplace on the opposite wall, and a part of the room that was set back where there were two doors, the first, leading the en-suite. It was absolutely amazing, the back wall held his and her sinks, then a set of drawers/shelves, and then a vanity on the other side. A large, Jacuzzi tub sat in the middle of the floor, and then clear double doors led to a ginormous marble walk in shower.

"We could have a party in there!" I said as Edward started to laugh, leaning down to kiss me.

Walking out of the bathroom opening the second door I became confronted with the perfect walk in closet. Two floors, with indents into the wall perfect for clothes, shoes, bags, a island in the center with drawers made for jewelry, scarves, hats, gloves, anything and everything I could imagine. And upstairs there was more of everything. "Is this a closet, or heaven?" I asked Edward as he rolled his eyes. "I think we would be able to find a space for some of your things." I laughed.

Pulling me away from the closet Edward pulled me to the door in the hall that held the stairs. As we followed the winding staircase up, I was surprised to see that the attic was completely finished, and saw it as a play area for Logan, or an office space for me. This house was absolutely perfect.

We stood in the attic for a couple minutes before Edward looked at me. "Well what do you think?" he asked me.

"I love it, but half a million dollars is a lot of money Edward." But he just waved his hand at me. "No, I know what you're thinking, and you're not paying for this house, not by yourself." I said as he started to protest.

"Bella, I make more than enough money."

"And I have plenty of money to my name Edward. I have my inheritance, there is plenty there for the two of us to split the price."

"Let me do this for us. You've spent the last five years taking care of our son by yourself, it's the least I can do."

"Edward you need to stop apologizing for that, you didn't know."

"Bella, please, let me do this for you, for us."

"Okay" I said after a few minutes. "You do realize that we haven't talked to Logan yet. That we don't even know if he'll agree to this?"

"Bella, you do realize that he's five. He'll have plenty of time to make new friends, to find a new team to play on, and he can visit his old ones, New Jersey isn't that far." He said as I looked at him.

"Alright, I'll start planning for a move." I said as he smiled.

Agreeing to this it was life changing, but I knew that it was something that I needed to do in order for our family to grow. Edward and I walked hand in hand down the stairs and into the main area. At that time Maggie was walking out of the kitchen with another couple that ended up walking right out the front door.

"So what did you think?" she asked us as we waited for the couple to walk out the door.

"I think we'll take it." Edward said as he shifted Logan from one hip to another.

"Really, price and all?"

"Yes, the price isn't a problem." Edward said as she smiled, grabbing her card from the table in the middle of the room.

"Here's my card. If you give me a call on Monday I can conference you in with the owners. I'm sure when they find out that you're offering the asking price it won't take long to close." We talked to Maggie for a while longer before Logan started to stir, making a quick decision to leave before he really woke up, making the new house a surprise.

We found ourselves back at Edward's apartment half hour later, after stopping back at the arena to pick his truck up. Then, we had to talk to Logan, oh, this would be fun.

**One month later **

I had to admit that telling Logan we were moving to Pittsburgh was a lot easier than I thought it was going to be. He understood that things hadn't worked out with Edward getting to play for New Jersey, and that he really wanted to be with us all the time. So while he continued out his contract we would be moving to Pittsburgh, I have our chance at being a family.

One stipulation was that we had to find a good hockey team for him to join once he got his cast taken off, and that we had to visit New Jersey at least once a month so he and Alex could continue to be best friends.

As the days came closer and closer to our move date, we would be moving during Logan's February break, I saw my friends and family as much as I could before we left. Esme agree to help with managing the bakery, and the girls promised to call me twice a week to let me know how everything was going. I had passed on the family recipes that I used to Angela, who would be taking over as head baker once I left. Since I had agreed to let Edward pay for the house, and my bakery here was doing so well, I was budgeting some money to rent out space in Pittsburgh to try and open another branch of Eclipse Café there. With Logan being in school a majority of the year, and Edward training, or playing September through June, I needed something to do with my time, and opening another bakery would be perfect.

Rose was getting large by the day, at now six months pregnant she was struggling to get to her classes on time, and often wondered how she would walk at graduation in just a few months time. I knew that she was relieved graduation was a week before her due date, and even though these we're her first children and most arrive late, she was having twins, and they, well they almost always arrive early.

The last couple weeks had been beyond stressful with everything happening all at once, but somehow I was getting through it. Today I would be joining Rosalie at her doctor's appointment, seeing that Ryan was on a business trip, and she wanted the emotional support. She was six months along, and glowing, and I just knew that she would make the best mother. Logan was at school until four o'clock, so with luck Rosalie and I could swing by and pick him up on the way back from the doctor's appointment.

"Hello beautiful, don't you look lovely today." I said as Rosalie climbed into my car.

"Oh stop, I'm huge." She said with a huff as I laughed at her.

"You're growing to make enough room for those lovely twin girls you have inside of you. You're a lovely kind of huge, not a whale kind of huge." I said with a roll to my eyes and a laugh in my voice.

"Thank you for telling the truth. If it was Alice she would tell me that I was in no way shape or form huge, and I know that I am, I don't want to be lied to." She said as I laughed.

"Point taken Rosie. How's Alex doing with the whole pregnancy thing?"

"So far so good, he doesn't want to be an only child anymore. We're trying to explain to him that the twins are going to be really small, and that he won't be able to rough house with them. We're also trying to explain that they're girls, and once they get a bit older, they still might want to do that with him." She explained. "I think he's secretly hoping that either the doctor is wrong about one of the girls genders, or that there is a third baby inside of me, and it's a boy." She said with a smile.

"Urgh, three babies at once? No thank you, you'll have enough trouble trying to handle the two and make sure that Alex is happy."

"Oh thanks for the vote of confidence Bella" she said as I laughed.

"Hey now, I never said that you weren't going to be able to do it. I just said that it was going to be tough."

"Yeah, yeah. So how is the move going? You getting excited, it's next weekend isn't it?"

"My house is a complete mess. Between trying to figure out what I do and don't need to take with me, and boxes everywhere, I think I'm going to go insane. Every time I try and pack away some of Logan's toys, he ends up wanting something that I packed. It's the reason why I'm happy that Edward and I are letting movers take care of everything, and that we bought all new furniture to go with the house. They're taking the things I want to keep to the storage unit I have, and I'm only bring down clothes, books, toys, and kitchen accessories."

"I'm just happy that we don't have to deal with finding a big enough place. How are you feeling by the way, any better?"

"I mean, I feel better than I did yesterday. But there still are some days where I don't feel the best. I honestly think that it's just stress, once the move is over, I think I'll be just fine."

As I pulled into the parking lot I let Rosalie get out before I parked, it would take her longer to get out, and some of the spots were really tight, so it was best to let her out now. After that I found the closest spot that I could and parked, before sprinting into the building, and magically catching up to Rose. "Why the hell do they have the office on the second floor, and no elevator?" she asked me as I started to laugh. "It's not funny."

"Oh, no, it's hilarious. I have a kid remember? I had to do this too, and I was only seventeen."

Eventually, the two of us made it up the stairs and into the office where a nurse was already waiting for Rosalie. "I figured you were just having trouble with the stairs," she said, as I noticed it was one of our old friends, Jessica. "Haven't seen you in a while Bella, how's that little boy of yours?"

"Good, really good. Currently has a broken arm, but still a happy kid."

"How have you been?"

"I've been good. Getting ready to move, but asides from the stress everything is good."

"You're moving? Where to?"

"Pittsburgh actually, Logan's father and I are back together, so we're getting a place for the three of us."

"And you're moving the little boy there? I thought you had a business here, and he has all his friends? Shouldn't his father move here?" she said as she started to get a little too nosey.

"Well, he was supposed to, but something fell through and he can't leave his job. So Logan and I are making the move there, with promises to find Logan a good hockey team, and to visit here once a month so he can see Rose's step-son."

"Well Rose, Dr. Volturi will be with you in just a couple minutes." She said as Rose nodded, then rolled her eyes the moment the door shut.

"Gods, she's such a nosy bitch."

I just laughed, what more could I say, people were nosey and sometimes there wasn't anything you could do about it.

Dr. Heidi Volturi joined us a couple minutes later, and smiled at me as she welcomed Rose. "Bella Swan, I remember you. How is your little guy?"

"Perfectly healthy, just like you promised me about a hundred times after the birth." I laughed.

"See, I told you there was nothing to worry about." She said before she turned back to Rose.

"Alright darling, we're just going to do the simple things today, make sure that there isn't anything wrong with these lovely twins, then get you on your way."

It was as Dr. Volturi was taking Rosalie's blood pressure that I started to feel that something was wrong. Trying to take deep breaths, and show that nothing was wrong, I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again, the world was spinning. The last thing I saw before I blacked out was sick spinning versions of Rosalie asking me if I was okay.

**Authors Note; Okay guys, sorry about the wait. I've been really blocked on what to write for this chapter, and finally figured something out. I'm going to do my best to finish the story within the next sixteen days seeing that I want it finished before I leave for school, and it will be. **

**There are pictures going up on my profile of the new house, so you all can have some sort of visual. **

**Happy Reading, Love Lauren **


	12. Chapter 12

**AUTHORS NOTE: Alright my lovelies, I know what you're thinking, FINALLY AN UPDATE! And you would be right! I know I said that I wanted to finish the story in August, but between working, packing, and leaving for school I haven't had time. Now I'm going to try and finish before the year is over, but with school I make no promises. **

**ENJOY LOVELIES **

**Chapter Twelve **

**Edward Masen**

This week happened to be a particularly stressful one. The team was on the road until Wednesday, and then had two games that weekend. Then the following week we would be in Buffalo for a game against the Sabres, and then back to Pittsburgh to play the Islanders. We had that weekend off, and that was the weekend that Bella and Logan were finally moving to the Pittsburgh house.

The team had landed in Chicago earlier today and happened to be resting during the intermission of the second and third period when the assistant coach came running into the room. "Edward something is wrong, the Hoboken University Hospital has called your phone six times." He said handing me my cell phone.

"Hello?" I said in a panic throwing my gloves on the bench as I started to pace.

"Mr. Masen, this is Nurse Jones from Hoboken University Hospital. I see that you're a one Ms. Swan's emergency contact?" the woman said as I sat there in angst.

"Yes, is my girlfriend okay?"

"Ms. Swan was brought in earlier today. She had fainted at a friend's appointment; we're just getting around to contacting you. You're a very hard man to reach Mr. Masen."

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, we ran some diagnostic tests and there isn't anything seriously wrong with her. We're keeping her over night while we wait for results, but she'll be fine."

"She's not," I said before the nurse cut me off.

"Mr. Masen you're girlfriend is perfectly fine. Doctor Cullen, who I know is a good family friend, is her attending daughter. His wife, and daughter, her friends, and her son are with her, you have nothing to worry about."

The nurse hung up the phone not a second later as I started pacing back and forth, how the hell would I be able to focus now? "Edward what's going on?" Sidney asked me as I placed my phone into the cubby where my equipment was sitting.

"I have to go, I have to get to the airport."

"What do you mean, you have to get to the airport? We're in the middle of a hockey game?"

"Bella's in the hospital. She fainted at Rose's appointment, Logan has to be worried out of his mind."

"Holy shit, there is no way you can play out the rest of the game? Leave afterward?" Sidney asked me.

"Not unless you want me unfocused. I'll play, but there are no promises that I will perform my best. If I play, I leave as soon as I'm showered and packed away."

"Family comes first Edward, go." Bylsma said without looking to any one else for conformation.

**Bella Swan**

Slowly blinking I opened my eyes, confronted with the harsh light. "Bella" a mans voice breathed as I came face to face with Edward.

"What are you doing here, where am I?"

"You're in the hospital, you collapsed at Rosalie's appointment, and you've been out for hours. And the moment I found out you were in the hospital I took the first plane to New Jersey." I nodded as he looked at me. "Carlisle wanted to wait until you woke up to talk to us." He said just as Carlisle walked into my hospital room.

"Bella, nice to finally see you awake." Carlisle said as I nodded. "Well we got your blood tests back, it's actually quite funny, we found traces of human chorionic gonadotropin in your blood."

"I'm sorry, what's that?" Edward asked.

"HCG, better known as the pregnancy hormone." Carlisle said as Edward's eyes widened, whether it was in happiness or fear, I don't know, but I knew at this moment I was beyond happy, yet kind of scared. "I had a tech do an ultrasound while you were out, before Edward got here, and I'm happy to confirm that you are indeed pregnant Bella. About six weeks along, your due date should be somewhere toward the end of September, beginning of October. I'll leave you two, to talk." He said walking back out of the room as I turned to Edward.

"Okay, you have to tell me what you're thinking." I said quickly as he looked at me, his eyes sparkling.

"I'm going to be a daddy." He said quietly, a huge smile spreading across his face. "I'm going to be a daddy, and this time I'll get to see your big round, pregnant belly, a smile on your face. I'll get to change diapers, and teach him or her to play hockey, I'll get to be there, for everything." He said as he leaned down to kiss me, tears now falling down my face.

"So you don't think this is the wrong time at all?" I asked as he shook his head.

"When do we ever do anything at the right time?" he asked me, now crying tears of joy.

Hours later after I was finally discharged, with a promise from Edward to look after me, Edward and I returned to my crazy mess that was my house. Logan was spending the night at Rosalie's with Alex, and would be brought over tomorrow around noon, when Rosalie, Alex, Alice, and Esme would join us for a brunch. I knew that the only way I would get everyone off my back over what happened would be to tell them the truth, so we would do that tomorrow, rather than put it off a couple more weeks.

Edward had plans to meet the team in Pittsburgh on Wednesday, carrying out the rest of his road trip here with Logan and I. Then after the game against the Islanders he would be driving here to aid in the move, before we all drove back to Pittsburgh. I was excited to move, to be a family, and to really start growing. I was excited to be expanding upon our family; sure it may be to quick, but like Edward said, when have he and I ever done something that was perfectly planned.

Rather than getting really dressed up the next morning I decided upon a pair of jeans and a hoodie. I didn't want this to be turned in to some big, elaborate, celebration, which it likely would be; I mostly just wanted to let everyone know that I was okay, that we were okay.

Last night had turned out to be really good, Edward and I had our own celebration, giggle, and then afterward we talked about what we wanted for this new baby. Edward had mentioned that he would be fine with either a boy or a girl, but I was desperately hoping for a little girl. Sure, I'd be happy either way, but I really want a little more estrogen when surrounded by a sea of testosterone.

**Edward Masen**

For the last twenty-four hours I a permanent smile had been etched on to my face, I was so excited that I was going to be a father again. That I would have the chance to get up with this baby in the middle of the night, to shape the way it would grow up; I may have only missed the first five years of Logan's life, and there was still plenty more to help him grow, but in my opinion I missed the crucial ones. I hated that I didn't get to hear Logan say his first word, to watch him turn on his tummy, to crawl, walk, jump up and down, or run around the house, I wasn't there for any of that. Yes, I get to watch him grow up, to help him become a man, but I won't ever be able to look back and remember seeing him first riding a bike, leaving on his first day of school, none of that.

After our celebrations last night, I had said to Bella that I would be fine with either gender, but like every guy out there, I want a boy. Sure, we have Logan, and I love him more than anything, but this time, a little boy who looks like me. It would make me ecstatic. I smiled into the bathroom mirror, Bella was downstairs getting brunch ready, and I was doing my best to not distract her, by showering. And all I could think is; am I supposed to be glowing? Isn't that for the one who is actually pregnant? But I didn't care, I don't care.

I walked back into the bedroom just as my phone started to ring, and as I picked it up noticing the caller I.D. I had to groan. My mother, why did she always pick the worst possible times to call, why did they always have to ruin everything? Clicking the end button I stormed back into the bathroom to brush my teeth, "Your parents again?" Bella asked from the doorway to the bedroom, I hadn't noticed that she was standing there.

"Yeah"

"You really should talk to them you know. I'm not trying to guilt trip you or anything, but think about how I feel, my parents are gone, I don't get to talk to them anymore. I wish everyday that I could talk to them, just once, to show them everything I've been through and how I've over come that, show them my, no our, wonderful son, and the best boyfriend ever. I'm just saying one day you're going to wake up and they won't be trying anymore, and I don't think you want that. Just, talk to them, give them a chance." She said before turning and walking back downstairs.

She had told me this before, on Christmas day, I wasn't open to listening then, but now, after thinking about how this could affect the new baby, Logan, our family, maybe I was starting to listen. Grabbing my phone from where I had thrown it on the bed, I saw that I had one new voice mail. Maybe hearing what they had to say would make me understand, would make me want to talk to them.

"_Edward sweetie, hi, it's mom. Your father and I were at the game last night; you were playing so wonderfully, and had us actually rooting for the Penguins. We haven't seen you in so long, and wanted to surprise you after the game was over, but you never came back out after the second period. Are you okay? You're not injured are you, or hurt? Sweetie we're worried. We know that we aren't the best parents in the world, but we miss you, and we want to try and fix things. Please Edward just give us a chance, we love you, we don't want to loose you. We can't loose you." _

Groaning I flopped on the bed taking a second to the message a second time, and then a third time, before I decided to call them back. The phone rang only twice before someone picked up; what was I expecting, that's what people do, they pick up phones.

"Edward, Edward sweetie are you there?" my mother asked in a mothering tone that I had never heard before. She likely thought I was going to hang up it was a good guess.

"Yeah, I'm here" I said quietly, finally breaking the five-year silence between us.

"Oh sweetie, you don't know how wonderful it is to hear your voice." She said as I heard my father in the background, asking whom she was talking to. I didn't say anything to her about her last comment, it was awkward, and I couldn't think of any words to express. "How have you been?"

"I've been good, really good actually."

"We've been watching you play, your father bought a special channel on the television that allows us to watch all the Penguins games. You've done splendidly over the last five years, but you disappeared the last part of December and beginning of January, then again for part of last night, is everything okay, you're not injured are you?"

"No, I, I um just had some stuff to deal with." I said quietly, not knowing how to approach this, or how to even talk to them.

"Well everything is okay, isn't it?" my father suddenly asked. I hadn't even noticed that he had gotten on the line.

"Edward, everyone is going to be here soon, just so you know!" Bella called from outside the door, as I called back a response to her.

"You, you live with a girl?" my mom squeaked as I gave a little chuckle.

"Not yet no, my girlfriend, well she collapsed yesterday while she was at an appointment with a friend. I was in Chicago for the game, but flew back when I got the call. So I'm in Hoboken with her until Wednesday, then I'll go back to Pittsburgh for the game against the Islanders, then come back to Hoboken that weekend to help her move."

"She's moving to Pittsburgh to be with you?" my mother asked with an obvious bought of happiness in her tone.

"Yes, we bought a house together. When the deal for me to move to New Jersey fell through we ended up buying a house in Pittsburgh and the three of us will live there."

"Edward, time to eat!" Bella called again as I suddenly realized all the noise that was downstairs, so before either of my parents had time to say anything I signed off.

"Look, we have company, so I have to go. But I'll call later, I promise." I said as they both told me they loved me before hanging up. Quickly throwing on a pair of jeans and a button up shirt I walked downstairs where Logan automatically threw himself into my arms.

The house was noisy, and not to mention cramped, but as we all sat around the table laughing, and enjoying each other's company I couldn't help but notice that this was how life was supposed to be. A big family, all joined together laughing and smiling, I couldn't ask for anything more.

**March **

**Edward Masen**

For the last month, Bella, Logan, and I had been successfully living under one roof together, full time. Bella's first order of business was to get Logan's bedroom painted and decorated so we could move him in. We left it simple, since we had chose the split level bedroom for Logan, Bella had had us (meaning Sidney, a few other of the boys, and I) build a desk that sat caddy corner, and a set of shelves for shoes, skates, and other various items. Let me tell you, there was a reason we were hockey players and not handy men, but we ended up figuring it out (meaning finding someone to build them for us). Then on the upper level was a full bed, with a headboard made of older hockey sticks; sticks collected from ones that the team had broken, or didn't use anymore. We had also had his old hockey jersey's framed, and one of mine from my days in college, before hanging them on the wall. Complete with a closet filled completely with clothes, and a navy blue bathroom we were finally finished.

Our room was next, and thankfully, since Bella loved the way it already was, we only added the new furniture, pictures, and decorations before filling the closest and bathroom. The rest of the house was actually fairly easy to decorate since we had the entire team, minus Emmett, who had been scarce lately, helping us.

Bella took care of the kitchen since it was her domain, and the boys and I took over the basement, which had been turned into the man cave. The attic was turned into a combination guest bedroom and office, and the two bedrooms on the second floor were left empty. One for the impending baby, which the guys still didn't know about; we wanted to keep it a secret from them for a little while longer, and the other, because we simply didn't know what to do with it.

The indoor pool had been very popular with Logan, who had finally gotten his cast off, and his new friends, as well as my teammates, who seemed to like my house better than their own.

Today was Bella's first appointment with the new OBGYN, and I knew that she was nervous, but excited at the same time. The future was still a mystery for us, we didn't know where we would be months from now, all we knew was that we had just been brought together to be a family, and now, that family was expanding.

It wasn't just expanding in the, oh Bella's having a baby, way either. For the last month, I had been actively working on improving my relationship with my parents. There was a lot of explaining, a lot of talking, that needed to be done, but it was getting there. My parents were very proud people, and to have to apologize for the way they've acted toward, me treated me, it took a lot out of them, and I knew that they meant it. It's hard to be forgiving after so long, but Bella, well she's been great, and I know she's looking forward to getting to meet my parents in a couple of weeks.

After realizing that they had a grandson, the effort to get to see me, was more important than ever. Spoiling a grandchild, doting over them, in their eyes, spelt redemption, for the way they used to treat me, and maybe it would mean that. They hadn't a clue about they new baby yet, but a lot of people didn't. The team didn't, that made up a good part of our friends, and other than people outside of Bella's immediate friends and family, knew nothing, for now, our secret was safe with us.

My parents really had been great over the last month, since the second phone call, it was really nerve wracking, and it took me almost a week before I called them back, but when I did, I remembered why this needed to be done.

_Flashback_

"_Edward, we were beginning to think that you weren't going to call us." My father, Edward Sr. said as he answered the phone. "Elizabeth, your son is on the line if you want to join in the conversation." My father called to my mother as I gave a chuckle. I heard a clatter of a pot in the background before my mother, though short of breath, picked up the other phone. _

"_Edward" she breathed happily. I drew my arm out from behind my head, resting it around Bella as she snuggled into my side. _

"_I just needed to build up the courage, make sure that it was something that I really wanted to do. I hope you understand." _

"_We do Edward, we understand." Mother spoke. _

"_So how have you been son, the last time you called you left us with a couple questions." My father said bluntly, making me laugh loudly, causing Bella to elbow me in the stomach as she pointed at Logan and Alex who were fast asleep on the floor. _

"_Did I now? I'm sure you have a lot of questions considering it's been five years." I said darkly as my mother said something along the lines of 'Oh Edward' while Bella told me to not be an ass. _

"_Is that you're girlfriend next to you, she sounds like she can put you right in you place." My father chuckled. _

"_Yes, Bella is right next to me, reminding me to be a good boy." I said as he stuck her tongue out at me, turning back to the hockey game. _

"_Bella, a beautiful name." my mom mentioned. _

"_Her name is actually Isabella, but she goes by Bella. We only call her Isabella if she's in trouble." Another sarcastic comment earning me another elbow to the ribs, "you know if you keep doing that I won't be able to play due to an upper body injury." I whispered, causing her to snort. _

"_Yeah, I'm sure Bylsma and Sid would love to hear how poor Eddie-poo got injured by his 5'4" girlfriend." She laughed. _

"_Sorry I'm not really paying attention. I don't get to see Bella that often considering we live in different states." I said to my parents as they assured me that it wasn't a problem. "So you said I left you with some questions, fire away." _

"_You said that you had a deal with New Jersey fall through, what did you mean by that?" my father asked as I ran a hand through my hair. _

"_Honestly, exactly what it sounds like. Lou Lamoriello approached Bylsma about bringing me to play for the Devils. I had a situation come up, that would make a transfer, not really a trade, perfect for the situation; but Lamoriello and his guys pulled out, making the situation really messy." _

"_What do you mean a situation? Is it something to do with what happened between you and Emmett?" my mother asked as I sat there saying nothing for a moment, how the hell? _

"_How do you know something happened between Emmett and I?" I asked loudly as the boy's stirred on the floor. "Son of a bitch" _

"_Dad?" Logan groaned as my eyes widened, hoping that my parents didn't hear him. I didn't want to keep him a secret, but I wanted the chance to tell them first. _

"_Alright you two, up and at them. Teeth brushed and into your room, you don't need to stay up any longer." Bella said quietly as she followed both the boys upstairs. _

"_Um, Suzie McCarty told me." My mother said hesitantly, it was then that I knew she heard Logan. "Did someone just call you dad?" she asked. _

"_Yes, my son." Two identical gasps sounded through the phone, yeah, they weren't expecting that. _

"_You have a son?" my father asked_

"_Yes, Logan. He's five." _

"_Is he, he's not, that's not why you stopped talking to us, is it?" he asked slowly. _

"_No, Logan, well I didn't know about Logan until December, it's why I was gone for those few weeks." _

"_She kept him from you?" my mother said shrilly as I groaned. _

"_No, this is why I wanted to tell you, instead of you hearing him playing or something. Mother you said Suzie McCarty told you that something happened between Emmett and me, but she didn't say what, is that correct?" _

"_Correct." _

"_Well, the reason Emmett and me aren't talking is because he knew about Logan, but he didn't tell me." _

"_But if the girl kept him from you, then you surely can't blame Emmett."_

"_Bella didn't keep him from me. I don't know how to explain this properly." I said, taking a minute to run my hands through my hair again. "I met Bella six and a half years ago, she was in Pittsburgh with her friends for the weekend, and we hit it off. She was sixteen at the time, I had just turned nineteen, and we exchanged numbers and started talking, and didn't officially start to date until after her seventeenth birthday. Things got pretty serious pretty quickly, and Emmett didn't like that. He's admitted that he was jealous, that he thought I was replacing him, and he put an idea into my head; that my relationship with Bella was ruining whatever chance I had at becoming a great hockey player. It was narrow minded of me, but I believed him, and broke up with her shortly before Thanksgiving." I paused for a minute, before continuing. _

"_Somewhere in-between, Bella found out she was pregnant with our son. We hadn't intimately been together more than a couple times, and it took her a little to decided what she really wanted to do. So, she wrote a letter. A letter explaining everything, a letter telling me how hurt she was, telling me that she missed me, and giving me a chance to be a man and do the right thing. So one day, she drove from Hoboken, where she lives, to Pittsburgh, to hand me the letter face to face. She met Emmett in the lobby, and he said that I didn't want to see her, that I had moved, and changed my number; she asked him to give me the letter, but he never did. _

_Emmett knew that Bella was pregnant, not because she told him, or because he read the letter, but because it was noticeable. No one else saw her in the locker room that day, so no one had any idea of what Emmett was planning on doing. He stuffed the letter into the bottom of his bag, with plans to get rid of it, but he forgot about it. So six years later, when I was digging for stick tape in his bag, I found the letter. The letter that was yellowed but had my name on it, so I read it; I found out on the 16__th__ on December that I had a child. Sidney googled her, and led me back to Hoboken. It took a little convincing, but Bella finally heard me out, and practically jumped Emmett, before agreeing to let me have a relationship with Logan, then slowly, a relationship with her." _

_End Flashback_

Needless to say my parents hadn't been happy with Emmett, I mean, no one really was, but slowly, we were all coming to terms with everything.

It had taken a month of long conversations, of talking about our feelings, about everything that had happened in the last five years or so, but they were taking a week off from whatever they did in Chicago to come visit Bella, Logan, and I. Mostly because Bella wanted to get the house furnished before anyone came to visit, and now, I would be spending a week straight with the parents I hadn't seen in more than five years.

"Will you stop fidgeting?" Bella asked me, poking me in the side.

"I'm sorry, I just, my parents are going to be here later tonight, and I haven't seen them in five years, I'm nervous. Why aren't you nervous?" I asked her as she rolled her eyes at me.

"Edward I'm more nervous that something is going to be wrong with the baby. Your parents, they're going to be a piece of cake."

"The baby will be fine, you've been taking perfect care of yourself. Nothing will be wrong."

"I don't know, I just feel like there is something that we don't know."

"Honey there are plenty of things we don't know, but that doesn't mean that something is wrong."

We didn't sit in the waiting room for long before the nurse called us into the back. After checking Bella's weight, and taking measurements a confused glance quickly crossed her face before disappearing. "Alright Bella, Dr. Denali will be with you in just a couple minutes."

"Something is wrong, she looked as if something was wrong!" Bella said as the door shut behind the nurse.

"Nothing is wrong!"

We argued back and forth for a few minutes before the doctor stepped inside. "Ms. Swan, nice to finally meet you, and you, you must be the dad? Tanya Denali" she extended her hand outward, shaking both our hands before sitting in the chair in front of Bella.

"Now just a couple questions before we get this show on the road. Any other pregnancies, abortions, anything, I should know about?"

"No abortions, but a prior pregnancy yes. Our son, Logan, will be six in August."

"Perfect, any complications while you were pregnant with him?"

"No, everything went perfectly."

"Alright, that should be enough for now. How far along do you think you are?" she asked us, writing what we previously told her on Bella's file.

"Um, about ten weeks, I think?"

"Perfect, perfect. So you're just finishing up your first trimester. Lets take a look at this baby. Now when Jane was taking your measurements she noticed that you were a little bit large than you should be at ten weeks, now the baby could just be developing quicker, or your farther along that you thought, it could even mean that you have more than one bun in the oven."

Oh great, we might have twins.


End file.
